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Girls I need some serious and honest advice re: breastfeeding!


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  #1  
October 6th, 2012, 09:47 AM
ElizabethS's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ok so I have exclusively breastfed Brayden this whole time. He has started on cereal and vegetables per doctor's orders (he's a big baby so we started him at 4 mos on cereal and 5 mos with baby food). I wanted to exclusively breastfeed (no supplementing) for a year.

Well I started my new job on Wednesday and got my itinerary. I will be flying out on a Sunday and not coming back until late Friday night...in November for a week, and again in December and again in January. I have found a daycare that WILL take him for a large fee. BUT I'm going to have to fly with him and all of his stuff, put him in a strange daycare with strangers, and try to get back to my flight in time (the airport is 2hrs from my training and hotel) on Friday. I can pump during training and nurse him and cosleep at night.

OR I can leave him at home with daddy, with his regular routine, except he will have to sleep in his cosleeper and not in bed (daddy sleeps too deep) and DH will have to supplement him with formula because I simply dont' have enough milk stored up...I only have 15 feedings because he's a piglet and eats all the time. I am thinking about cutting out one of my 2 daily pumpings at work, so that I only have to pump at lunch while in training, and then pump overnight and bring it all back with me for the next time I have to leave (a month later).

OR I can wean him completely and put him on formula (which I REALLY REALLY REALLY would be heartbroken about). I'm bawling my eyes out about this whole situation. There are NO family members that can come and I simply can't justify pulling my older 2 out of school for a week a month especially when my son is struggling in school this year already with his ADHD and Aspergers. That's the only way that I could have DH go with me we'd have to bring all the kids, and then it would cost $800 EACH time I go up JUST for the plane tickets. If he drove to NC it would take probably 15hrs one way and lots of stress on if he would make it in time for my training class to begin on Monday.

I am going to be heartbroken if I have to leave him. Probably slip into a deep depression (seriously) if I have to wean him. What would YOU do? I know the UNSELFISH thing to do would be to leave him at home where he's familiar and with daddy and on his regular routine. The SELFISH part of me doesn't want to leave him behind and would move heaven and earth to bring him with me...but at what cost?

I know in a way it would be a lot less stressful to go to manager training only having to worry about myself. I will miss him terribly but the breastfeeding issue is what has me so confused on what to do. I LOVE nursing. I DON'T want to stop. I bought a can of formula today and am just staring at it on the counter. I know it's not poison and I know he probably won't even care. It's me who has the issue!

I am LEANING towards leaving him at home with dad, cutting back over the next month to only pumping once during the day and supplementing him with formula the other feeding, and then when I go to NC I will continue to pump once in the middle of the day and then overnight of course...and just hope that my supply stays up. I am afraid being away from Brayden for 6 days though is going to kill my supply, pumping or not. And that then I'll be forced to completely wean him.

I need some outside objective opinions please...because my brain is all muddled. It would also be better if I weaned due to my job...going to meetings halfway across the state and trying to find somewhere to pump is stressful enough..and I'm going to be working longer hours with the management position at the bank.

Le sigh...
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  #2  
October 6th, 2012, 10:35 PM
pr1madona's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I personally would not wean. Your supply may dip during the week, but it should go back up. If you're concerned, you can supplement during the week or when u get back, with fenugreek and blessed thistle. As for leaving/bringing him. Is he usually in daycare or would it be completely new? How often would you see him during the day? Could you have a nanny come with you instead? Those are some things I would be thinking about I also just noticed you're from FL too. I'm in North Florida
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  #3  
October 7th, 2012, 05:29 AM
ElizabethS's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I wouldn't be able to see him at all during the day. I don't trust a random nanny..I mean he is awful cute and one of my major fears is him being kidnapped lol. He is normally at home with daddy. Never been in daycare or with strangers.

I think I will just start him on formula during the day so that DH can supplement him while I'm gone. I'll continue pumping and just bring the milk back with me. I hope to have a freezer in the hotel room!
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  #4  
October 7th, 2012, 11:19 PM
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I cannot imagine having to do that. I would prob leave him at home though... i think it would be a lot less stressful. Then I would pump and bring back what you can....id read up on TSA rules and stuff though...no telling how dumb they are going to get about it.
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  #5  
October 8th, 2012, 09:16 AM
shanirah's Avatar Mommy Strawberry
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Yeah, I would check TSA's rules on boob milk. I think they allow it if you have the baby with you, but not if you don't. Unless you are checking luggage, then I would put it in a ziplock baggy (the container) and check it with your luggage.
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  #6  
October 9th, 2012, 07:06 AM
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Ok- this is what I would do personally. My first option would be bringing the baby but that DOES sound very stressful and hard. So my next option would be leaving him and pumping. Though I would NOT try to bring the milk back with me simply because of logistics- I would look for the Human Milk 4 Human Babies in whatever state you're traveling to and find someone to donate the milk to. There is a big need for donor milk. Then when I got home, I'd continue nursing as much as possible.
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  #7  
October 9th, 2012, 08:05 AM
JenJen3574's Avatar Super Mommy
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I know it will be really hard to leave your LO, but I would leave him with daddy where you know he will be taken care of best. I would not start supplementing with any formula now though. Keep giving him your milk as you have been and then your DH can supplement with formula while you are away if you don't have enough stored up.

I would be worried about supply issues too, which is why I wouldn't start supplementing before the trip(s). The higher your supply going in, the better it will be afterward, even if there is a dip. Pump as much as you can (or is practical) while you are gone and hope for the best. When you get back you'll hopefully be able to recover from any dip in supply after a week or so, but always give baby breast milk first, and formula only if no breast milk is available.

You have to do what is best for you and your family, and I'm so sorry your job requires you to be away - that must be really hard. All of us can only do what we can do though. Just do the best you can and know that is all there is to do. ((hugs))
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  #8  
October 13th, 2012, 03:33 PM
ElizabethS's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ok well we tried supplementing with one bottle of formula during the day (but I kept pumping 2x at work and wanted to try stocking up the one feeding of BM so while I am gone he will get more BM than formula).

He refuses it. Gags, cries, keeps his mouth shoved shut so you can't get the nipple in. We've tried warming it, mixing it with breastmilk, and two different types of formula. He refuses it all. And sucks down the BM like there is no tomorrow. He held out for 8 hours on Monday and DH finally broke down and gave him BM.

So NOW what do I do? Do I bring him with me and have him possibly scared during the day with strangers in a daycare? Or do I leave him at home and have him possibly starve himself? I don't want to get to NC and him go on strike and refuse to drink anything. I have only 12 feedings of BM stored up and he eats so often that I can't get in any extra pumpings to try to stock up before November 4th.
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  #9  
October 14th, 2012, 07:12 AM
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I personally would figure out a way to take him with me. I wouldn't be able to leave him that long, plus he sleeps with me at night so I don't know how he would sleep, along with refusing to eat formula during the day. I don't know what's best for you, though. Tough call.
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  #10  
October 14th, 2012, 08:59 AM
ElizabethS's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Yeah he sleeps with me at night too. And wont' drink formula. So I'm thinking I'm left no choice...I think it will be stressful but I would honestly SELFISHLY want to bring him with me. I havnet' left him more than just during the workday. And that's hard enough. But I didn't want him to get sick from the airplane germs or be scared with strangers. I do have a daycare lined up just in case. The money isn't an issue I'd pay a million dollars a week to keep him with me I just want HIM to be happy!
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  #11  
October 15th, 2012, 08:33 AM
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I would try to up your supply now. start taking fenugreek (i saw results in about a day) and any other suppliments you can. drink plenty of fluids too. do you feed him on only one side each feeding? if so, try pumping after each feeding - you should be able to get at least a little bit out of the side you didn't feed him on, and it will encourage the side you did feed him on to produce a bit more. also try to pump as soon as you get up in the morning especially if you aren't doing night feedings - if you are worried about having enough to feed him, just pump off one side in the morning and leave one for him to eat off of.
hopefully you can get at least a few more feedings stocked up before you have to leave...have you considered overnighting milk back to florida to him? maybe on tuesday or wednesday you could pack some in a cooler with some dry-ice and overnight it (if money isn't an issue for you - cause i bet it would be expensive). then maybe he will have enough milk to get him through the rest of the week.
how many food feedings is he having a day? could you add in another snack or meal to make the BM go further the week you are gone?

I had to make a similar choice with my babies...luckily our son was not in school so everyone could come with us with no issues. We drove 16 hrs with a 3yr old and 2 four month olds...so it can be done! we broke it into multiple days though - best decision ever!
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  #12  
October 19th, 2012, 06:46 PM
ElizabethS's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well this is what we are doing....

DH has finally got him taking 1/2 formula 1/2 breastmilk. Which makes the feedings I DO have stored go TWICE as far. I have about 70oz stored (15 feedings, 30 feedings if he does half and half). I am ordering an online breastmilk shipping kit..comes with the cooler, the box, and the dry ice. Called the hotel and they have a freezer I can use in the kitchen to freeze the milk before shipping it.

I can ship the milk on Tuesday or Wednesday and he should have enough until I get bakc on Friday. We also upped him to eating 4oz of baby food 2x per day because the BM and formula just hasn't been doing it and he's been acting like he needs more solid food.

Now, if I can make the final decision and actually leave him at home...dunno. LOL. BUT I do have it all planned out, located a UPS only 2 miles from the training facility I will be at with the bank and everything....just don't know if I can walk away and actually do it (leave him behind).

As for sleeping on his own....I'm going to try to get DH to get him sleeping in his pack n play during the day for naps now so that when it comes time for me to go its not such a shock from him to go from sleeping snuggled up next to mom to sleeping on his own...right now DH lets him nap in the swing, but I refuse to let him sleep in the swing overnight or for longer periods!
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