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Witnessed something horrible!!


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  #1  
November 16th, 2012, 01:32 PM
BlessedMommyx's Avatar Stephanie
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Location: Orange County, California
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Sorry I just have to vent!! I'm so angry and speechless at what I just saw!!

I was at the mall with my LO and another LO I was babysitting and we were in the play area. The little girl I was watching was playing with another little girl. they are both around 1 1/2 years. Anyways, me and the mother were chatting and then all of a sudden we look across the little play area (its not that big) and all of us including other mothers around got up so fast! a 3/4 year old boy had her daughter (A 15 MONTH OLD!) pinned against a wall and was choking her!!
The mother screamed and ran over there and was able to get her. But the dad just grabbed him yelled at him and strapped him into the stroller and left him there while the sibling played. I'm sorry but for something like that you leave!! And another thing, hitting, pushing and kicking are all normal developmental behaviors (obviously you correct these when they happen) but choking is definitely not normal!! What an aggressive child! I am just horrified at what I had wittnessed! Some people should just not have children!! I get some children are aggressive but that father did nothing to discipline that child for what could have been a really bad outcome.
That poor baby girl was just terrified.
ugh sorry I just really needed to vent! Shook me up a bit.
Little girl is fine. After a few moments and cuddles from her mommy she went back to playing. Tough little cookie.
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  #2  
November 16th, 2012, 01:50 PM
SuperMartianRobotMom6's Avatar Proud Mama & Happy Wife
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I think your over reacting. My little brother 18m accidently gave my 5month old a black eye by kicking him. Its not that theyre aggressive, theyre boys. They do what they see. He shouldnt of been choking the little girl but my guess is he saw it in a movie. And some father's dont discipline their children. My MIL wouldnt allow her husband to discipline DH. Its just the way it is.
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  #3  
November 16th, 2012, 01:54 PM
BlessedMommyx's Avatar Stephanie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DukesMommy12 View Post
I think your over reacting. My little brother 18m accidently gave my 5month old a black eye by kicking him. Its not that theyre aggressive, theyre boys. They do what they see. He shouldnt of been choking the little girl but my guess is he saw it in a movie. And some father's dont discipline their children. My MIL wouldnt allow her husband to discipline DH. Its just the way it is.
Kicking, hitting and pushing all normal behaviors of children. But choking is definitely not one of them.
I don't feel like I am overreacting. I've seen aggressive kids doing normal naughty behaviors. I've never seen a child so blatanly just stand there pinning a baby to wall with both his hands wrapped around her neck steadily shaking and choking her. That is not normal.
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  #4  
November 16th, 2012, 01:58 PM
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That would upset me too, unfortunately, discipline is a dying thing...people are so afraid to say no to their kids these days. It is sad. If I were that mother, I probably would have left the play area if that little boy was still there, I also would have said something to the father, like hey, your kid should apologize or you should apologize...something! A 3-4 year old should know better and discipline works at that age, maybe not at 18 months, but if he was 3-4 years old, he should most definitely NOT be choking or anything else without a consequence. Sure, he is a boy and may have seen it in a movie, but that behavior should be corrected. That kid will grow up to be a bully if he isn't taught any better, because he won't know what is right from wrong. Now, if they find that the way he handled it works the best, so be it, but he should have checked on the little girl to make sure she was okay.
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  #5  
November 16th, 2012, 02:38 PM
Amchelle's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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That is horrible, and you are NOT over reacting! Spencer is my 3rd boy, I have 4 brothers and been around mostly little boys, and I agree boys are rougher than grils are, that being said I agree at 3/4yrs old that is NOT acceptable behavior. Ds2 has ALWAYS been more aggressive than ds1, but he also KNOWS that kind of behavior will NOT be accepted, and he has known from a very young age! Not allowing the little boy to play may work for that child, but the father could have at least checked on the girl and made the boy apologize and as a parent apologized as well.
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  #6  
November 16th, 2012, 09:07 PM
The Lesha's Avatar Avada Kedavra
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okay first of all wow... if either of my boys did that to a little girl or a boy for that matter, we'd be leaving the area and he'd be in for it when he got home. That is NOT OKAY. No matter how old the child is, that is something to be dealt with, he should have been reprimanded immediately, at least with a lecture. then he should have been taken from the area. If it were my boys, the misbehaving one would be sent to his room while the other allowed to do something fun like craft or what not just to show what you get if you behave properly.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DukesMommy12 View Post
I think your over reacting. My little brother 18m accidently gave my 5month old a black eye by kicking him. Its not that theyre aggressive, theyre boys. They do what they see. He shouldnt of been choking the little girl but my guess is he saw it in a movie. And some father's dont discipline their children. My MIL wouldnt allow her husband to discipline DH. Its just the way it is.
I totally disagree with this. You are not overreacting. If this happened to your child you would feel the same way. This isn't just boys being boys. As a mother of two boys, that is not how mine behave. I wouldn't allow it.
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  #7  
November 17th, 2012, 05:26 AM
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You are not overreacting at all. As for punishment, who knows.. he might not had it all yet. I think strapping him in a stroller is a good punishment at the moment. It shows him that kids who behave get to play ( like his siblings ), it would be unfair to punish everyone in the family and leave the play area because of one kid's wrongdoings. He should have had the kid apologize though. This is my opinion,and everyone has their own opinions.
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  #8  
November 17th, 2012, 09:40 AM
Celry's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I don't think you are over reacting either. My girls are super rough, more so than a lot of boys, but even at 3 they know that kind of behavior is just wrong. The father may have bee super embarrassed and not sure how to handle it. Hopefully he handled it once he was gone and did not ignore it. The kid may have aspergers or be autistic. You never know what is going on. I would be shaken just like you though.
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  #9  
November 17th, 2012, 02:09 PM
LindseyE117's Avatar Wookie's Girl
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I agree with Cary, discipline is a dying thing. You are not over reacting at all. I would be livid if that happened to my child and the father didn't even apologize. If the father would have seemed sorry and apologized, then I might have let it slide. Common courtesy and kindness is few and far in between now a days.
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  #10  
November 17th, 2012, 03:24 PM
LJD3Tdance's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Idk if I'd gone as far as to say he shouldn't have children, but he may just not have known what to do, or he may be the kind who'd rather deal with it in private. Which to that end, I think I totally agree, that's when you LEAVE.
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  #11  
November 17th, 2012, 05:29 PM
BlessedMommyx's Avatar Stephanie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LJD3Tdance View Post
Idk if I'd gone as far as to say he shouldn't have children, but he may just not have known what to do, or he may be the kind who'd rather deal with it in private. Which to that end, I think I totally agree, that's when you LEAVE.
I was just venting because I was really just nerves were shot didn't mean that. (he really had that baby girl in a death grip.) Just meant like if he is going to have children he needs to learn to to teach them right from wrong.

-----
And personally, if my child EVER did something that extreme I would be too embarrassed to even stay around. All the other moms were just glaring at him it was that bad.

And yeah no apology or acknowledging the child he just hurt. After the dad put him in the stroller the dad just sat there and whipped out his phone and carried on like nothing happened.
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  #12  
November 21st, 2012, 04:37 PM
LJD3Tdance's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Men show embarrassment differently, maybe that is how he shows embarrassment? (Hiding in the phone.) Or maybe he's just clueless lol.
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  #13  
November 21st, 2012, 05:39 PM
Mommy-to-2's Avatar Veteran
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WOW!! Totally not over reacting!! at the age of 3 or 4 you know exactly what you are doing! This sounds a lot like my cousins boys. They are so rough (ages 3 and 6) kicking, punching and hitting each other because their dad "plays" rough with them. They do not discipline at all and if one of them EVER did something like that to my babies I would come unglued!!!! At the age 1-2 ok, they are just playing, i'm sure but by 3 years old, no, that's just way too aggressive!!
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