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Who else still hasn't told???

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  • 1 Post By acchickpea

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July 15th, 2013, 07:05 PM
Cyn's Avatar
Cyn Cyn is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: East Coast, USA
Posts: 883
Is anyone else still keeping being pregnant a secret? If so is it harder or easier as time passes? When are you planning on telling (How far along will you be?) and who first? Any ideas on how you will do it? Have any of you had to lie in order to keep it a secret?

For those who have told...Who have you told? How was your news received? Has it helped it to feel more real?

I'm just really interested and I'm not sure this question has been asked.
ME, 39 - wife to DH, 39 (3.18.2001) & mommy to DS (4.2006) & DD (2.2014), BEAN (9.12.2017)!

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July 15th, 2013, 07:17 PM
Cyn's Avatar
Cyn Cyn is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: East Coast, USA
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As for me...

We have only told our son, who's 7. It was just too difficult to keep talking in code and we knew that no matter what happened, we wouldn't be able to hide it from him. Not too mention he has wanted a sibling so badly for so long. Other than him we have told no one except the new ob I am using, the pharmacist, and my dh had to tell his employer bc he knew we were going through fertility treatments.

For me it seems to get easier to not tell as time goes on, but unfortunately we have had to white lie at times when asked when we were starting our ivf process and when asked why I wasn't drinking. That part was kind of hard.

We are planning on telling when we are almost to the 2nd trimester right before we go on vacation. We'll tell our parents first and then I think we are going to have a pool party / bbq to tell the rest of the family and our close friends. Still don't know how we are going to come out with it though. I'm kind of nervous about it, but I still have like a month before then so there's still lots of time. I'm the most nervous to tell my mom, dad, and lil sis who are not having an easy time lately.

So that's me! How about all of you?
ME, 39 - wife to DH, 39 (3.18.2001) & mommy to DS (4.2006) & DD (2.2014), BEAN (9.12.2017)!

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July 15th, 2013, 07:25 PM
melaniek85's Avatar Frankie and Ronin's mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: York, pa
Posts: 4,231
Dh's dad and sister, his close two friends, my parents and sister and one friend all know, we told them about 2 weeks after we found out. Dh also had to tell his boses today, so they wouldn't schedule dh to go out of town on the day of my ultrasound next week. My mom also told my aunt (her sister), I don't know why really, I am not at all close to my aunt. Everyone else we are waiting a little while, if everything goes well at our ultrasound next week, we may tell everyone else then. With my son, everyone knew at 8 weeks but I just haven't felt comfortable telling people yet, I've been worried about the baby being ok and also about comments people will make, so I'm in no rush.
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July 15th, 2013, 08:14 PM
caliroo34's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 580
I haven't told yet. I want to know for sure how far along I am first. I also want to at least get past the next ultrasound and possibly even the one after that. I'm just too afraid of something happening and having to tell people I lost the baby. I'd like to minimize the risk.

I'm finding I want to tell pretty badly now! It's getting hard to keep it in. There is one person who knows though-my best friend. I called and told her before I told OH! As far as telling people-I'll call my immediate family members individually and tell them (I live away.) For OH's family we'll probably announce at a get together if there's one coming up. If not, then I suppose we'll just go around and tell them individually too. I'm nervous about everyone's reaction as I'm pretty sure they'll all assume it was an accident. But we'll set them straight and hopefully they'll see how happy we are.

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July 15th, 2013, 08:25 PM
Jibby's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Hell, also known as Arizona ;)
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Well if my US tomorrow is all good my moms side of the family will know Thursday! We are going on vacation with them Wed and no way can I hide it! Ill be almost 10 weeks. We will wait until week 12 to tell everyone else! If it weren't for this trip we would wait until then to tell everyone. I am excited though ....got my mom and her soon to be husband grandma and poppy tshirts as wedding gifts. I'm going to make them open their gifts early because our gift is just SO extravagent it cant wait

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July 15th, 2013, 08:27 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Nebraska, USA
Posts: 1,021
I'm finding it SOOO difficult not to tell certain people... we'll announce on FB and to our students when school starts (a little less than a month away...).

Right now, our parents know, our 3 best friends, siblings, and one grandparent. We're planning to mail u/s pictures to my two sets of grandparents tomorrow (as long as everything is ok), and then tell the last set at our family reunion the first week of August. We've also told our principal, landlady, and the woman helping us with our children's play.

I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to tell the girls on our speech team. At camp a few weeks ago, they kept asking when we were going to have a baby so they can babysit... but I held strong!

So far, everyone has been excited. I don't think the rest of our announcements will be any different... I'm ready for week 13 to get here so I can be a little more lax about keeping the secret!
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July 15th, 2013, 08:57 PM
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 339
We've only told family, no one else, my first u/s is tomorrow, so if that all goes well, i'll tell a few close friends and probably no one else until we are passed the first trimester. It is getting harder!
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July 15th, 2013, 10:29 PM
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KAB KAB is offline
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Location: California
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We haven't told anybody at all, and it's gotten easier with the time to keep it a secret. We'll wait until about 15 weeks to tell, and we're going to make a photo card and mail it to family first. Hopefully I can still hide my belly for another month or so.

Can't wait to meet our new baby GIRL!

Never forgetting all my sweet angels: Twins 10 weeks 1/2010 Baby B 8 weeks 8/2010 Angel 5 weeks 3/2013
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July 16th, 2013, 05:46 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,409
We haven't told anybody yet. It's not that hard for me to keep it a secret. When I had my loss we had told everybody and it was terrible having to tell them all that we had lost the baby so I just don't want to ever have to go through something like that again.

We have our first ultrasound tomorrow so as long as everything looks good we will go ahead and tell our family and close friends. We won't announce on facebook until after we know the gender which will be around 20 weeks.

Thank you *Kiliki* for my beautiful siggy
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July 16th, 2013, 06:30 AM
lovemyleah's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 6,387
We told immediate family and a few close friends after my ultrasound at 8 weeks. We are waiting for FB, simply because I'm paranoid. My 5 year old knows, because I am so sick. With time it gets easier not to shout it to everyone.
Hi all! I'm Lisa
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July 16th, 2013, 06:54 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,386
We haven't really told anybody. Dh told his boss at work because I am so sick. Oh and dh told his best friend but that's it. I have an ultrasound on Thursday so we will probably tell my family after that. And I don't know if/when we will tell dh's family. They live 30 hours away and we don't get along with them. I probably won't announce on facebook for awhile. Its not hard for me to keep it secret honestly this was a huge surprise and I'm still trying to process it.

Thank you so much AlexAiden Mommy for my beautiful siggy!
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July 16th, 2013, 08:42 AM
victoria0294's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,083
I've told 3 people at work (my boss, the leave admin, and another co-worker). I work in HR with them so I knew I'd tell them all first because of needing time off.
I also told my best friend, and we told our really close group of friends (3 other couples who are also pregnant!)
We have to wait until August to tell family because DH's family lives out of town and that's the soonest we can get everybody together. I wouldn't dare tell my family before his, even though they live in the area, because that would cause A TON of drama lol.
So far everybody we've told has been very excited for us, and I'm sure our families will have the same reaction.
I've already had 2 ultrasounds and everything looks good, so I really wish I could tell my family sooner!

We will probably hold off on fb until we find out the gender(s).

expecting identical twin girls!!
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July 16th, 2013, 10:02 AM
acchickpea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: new jersey
Posts: 3,311
I wanted to wait till I was about 12 weeks before I let the family know... Of course my DH found out when I had my DS sit on his alpha mats spelling out "Ma IS PREGO".... (took a while for him to realize but he did eventually)

told my parents when I was about 6 weeks and their reaction wasn't too amused but more on the precautionary stage... I think because when I announce my first angel baby they took the news close to heart.. it's tough... so I guess they wanted to make sure that this pregnancy is safe.

My DH wanted to tell my In laws.. told them at 7.5 weeks and the father in laws reaction???? no words or emotions... (whatever...)... Mother in lAw thought we were lying... then she was excited.... told the sister in law.. she said congrats..

Told my sister but didn't want her to tell anyone else because it still was early... then she told our mutual friend...

Brother in law found out from Mother in law... and the grapevine has now started.......
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July 16th, 2013, 10:30 AM
mBABYe's Avatar ♥ Life with BOYS ♥
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: South Florida
Posts: 2,753
We haven't really told anyone. We're waiting to find out what happens with babyB before making any type of announcement. Just the girls from my two previous PR's know for now. & one friend that has been babysitting my boys while I have OB appointments. I actually didn't tell her the first week but the second week when I finally spilled the beans she was like "I know... I go to someone else in that practice and as soon as you said your guys name I knew he was the OB of the group.. He doesn't even do GYN appointments." HAHAHA. Whoops! Can't believe she kept that secret from MEEEEE for a week! LOL

Oh wait! I did have to tell my stepmom on July 4th. She made these awesome strawberry margaritas jello shots (inside of strawberries) specifically for ME sooooo I had to have her help me with a cover story. HAHAHA. Everyone kept bringing me them all day and I would just pass them off. By the time the fireworks started.. she was WASTED!

Wife since 2004. ♥ Mom since 2008.

♥ TTC #1: 4 yrs, 2 months ♥ TTC #2: 1 yr, 5 months ♥ #3: Surprise twins lost at 7 & 10 weeks.

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July 16th, 2013, 12:02 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,109
We haven't told and won't until 12 weeks.
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