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Your SO's time off

Forum: 2014 Playroom


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November 18th, 2013, 03:22 PM
Sarah Marie's Avatar Mom to Leiland and Owen
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Middle TN, Born and raised in MI
Posts: 10,454
How much time are you hoping to have your SO off work when baby comes?

And those who have 2 or more, what do you think is a good amount of help???

This is baby #2. DH took the week before and the week after my son was born. He was a week late and induced. I didn't think I needed him much longer than that. But this time I am worried I will want him home more since we have a toddler too.
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November 18th, 2013, 03:51 PM
jes81878's Avatar Jennifer
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Burlington, KY
Posts: 613
I will be scheduled for a c-section at 38 weeks (praying I make it that far). My husband will take two weeks off and then, work from home for another 2 weeks. Then, he plans on only going into the office 2 or 3 days a week for the next 6 months or so. We don't have other family around, and even with him here, I'm worried about caring for two infants.
Jennifer 34 (tubal factor and lost my left tube from ectopic)
Andres 34 (perfect SA)
My Son 10
My Son 13
Husband no bio/children (but the best father ever to my two boys)
TTC for 4 years
IVF in June 2013 (BFP)
1st Beta (10dp5dt) #761

Boy/Girl Twins

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November 18th, 2013, 04:25 PM
Schofield06's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Missouri
Posts: 2,364
My DH probably won't take any time off. He has a new job, and works 2 or 3 days at a time and has 2 or 3 off. So, I'm sure he'll leave work if I'm in labor, but he'll keep working his normal schedule. I might have to have my mom come help me the days he's working.
Aug. 21 2012
Mar. 31 2013
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November 18th, 2013, 04:47 PM
Melissa.Anne's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Burlington, Ontario
Posts: 139
My husband is taking 3 weeks off when baby comes. I will be taking 35 weeks of maternity leave and then he will be taking 17 weeks of parental leave after my 35 weeks is up
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November 18th, 2013, 04:55 PM
Nicole1481's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,219
My DH gets 10 days. He probably won't take additional time. Considering he was gone and I did everything by myself, 10 days should be ok

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November 18th, 2013, 04:56 PM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 138
No time off for him here. but he will be in for a rude awakening if he thinks he'll be getting off lightly at night. I'm sure he will be able to sleep at work hahahaha.
Sarah Marie and maybethistime like this.
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November 18th, 2013, 06:13 PM
Sarah Marie's Avatar Mom to Leiland and Owen
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Middle TN, Born and raised in MI
Posts: 10,454
We have no family around either. We did the one week he was off with Leiland, my mom and little sister came out. This time we will have my MIL come out, but not sure when she will be here. I want to time it so she can be here for the birth but obviously we don't know when that will be. Hubby works 12 hour shifts 6 days a week. He has Sundays off. He leaves at 430 and is home at 530. Plus he is in school. I know I will be doing a lot but I just want him home that first week plus a little more just to help with Leilands transition.
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November 18th, 2013, 06:56 PM
Alaska Baby14's Avatar Gonna be a family of 4!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Eagle River, Alaska
Posts: 1,390
Army will give DH 10 days off,,, but he might be going to school in April. So depending on when I have the baby and his date if departure, he may or may not get the full 10 days :/ but my mom is going to come up in April if he does leave, so the help will be nice!
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November 18th, 2013, 09:55 PM
maybethistime's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 631
For my last two, my Mom and one sister flew out to help while I was in the hospital and with older siblings. They always have to leave shortly after I get out of the hospital so I havne't had a tonne of help. Since I"m self employed, my husband might take paternity leave for 15 weeks
************************************************** *********************************
Married to DH - 11 years
DS born 2007
2009/09/07 - Angel #1
2010/05/18 - Angel #2
DS born 2011
Baby #3 EDD March 3, 2014

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November 18th, 2013, 10:00 PM
Sarah Marie's Avatar Mom to Leiland and Owen
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Middle TN, Born and raised in MI
Posts: 10,454
Maybethistime when do you purchase their tickets?
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November 19th, 2013, 02:01 AM
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 104
Hubby is military so he gets 10 of leave but we are planning to take more leave when my parents come to visit in May, so I think we'll be okay. No family here either (we're in Germany) so will just have to learn to do things on my own, lol.
Sarah Marie likes this.
Me - 31, Hubby 35 - together for 6 years, married since 2011, TTC 2.5 years

April 2013 - referred to RE due to failed reverse vasectomy

June 2013 - Hubby has TESE / Egg retreival and transfer (IVF/ICSI)

July 9, 2013 - BFP!
July 31, 2013 - 1st ultrasound, one baby bean with heartbeat!

November 7, 2013 - It's a GIRL!

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November 19th, 2013, 05:06 AM
StephanieMitchell's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 586
I don't think DH will be taking any time off. He is a new attorney at a law firm he has only been working at for about a year. They keep him really busy, and I don't think that they offer him any time off. Like lots of you other ladies, I will probably have my mom come up and stay with me for the first week, especially if I end up having to have a C-section! I just wish I lived closer to her so I didn't feel like I was putting her out or anything, but I know she will be happy to help and love all over her first grandbaby.
Sarah Marie likes this.
Welcome baby Lily!! 3/9/14 <3

We were going to have a baby, but we had an angel instead
Feb. 2013 at 8wks
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November 19th, 2013, 06:05 AM
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 208
Hubby gets 10 days and may/may not have training in April >.< either way my mom wants to come up around my sons birthday (5th of March also 3 weeks before edd) and is going to stay 1-2 months (depending on if my dh leaves for training or not) the 10 days if we get that will be all the time dh takes until July/August.
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November 19th, 2013, 06:41 AM
Mrs. D's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 626
My DH is also military, we get the standard 10 days.
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November 19th, 2013, 08:17 AM
momma2cupcakes's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: California
Posts: 66
If anything my DH will probably take a week off and my mom will probably take the week after like they did with my last daughter. DH only goes into the office 3 days a week as is and works from home the other days so that's a big help.
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November 19th, 2013, 08:26 AM
madis-mama17's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Utah
Posts: 412
My DH took 5 days off with DD and it just depends on how busy his work is. They are so busy now and I'm hoping he's not in Vegas on delivery 3hr away when I go into labor lol his work is awesome though so he can really take as much as we need. But my mom and sister are coming to help with DD and new baby. They stayed for 10 days last time and it is super helpful to have them here. We decided that my brother in law with take my DD until they can get here.

***proud mama***
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November 19th, 2013, 08:33 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Henderson, NV
Posts: 1,721
SO will probably just take off for labor delievery (if I give birth on a Wed or Thurs he would probably take off the rest of the week). But we specifically timed this pregnancy (yes it is weird but I get pregnant that easily), so his summer break (he is a teacher) would start right toward the end of my maternity leave to he will be home with the baby 2 months after I go back to work.

I did just find out this weekend that he has to go to a conference Apr. 9-12 which makes me really nervous because since I have a March 26 DD and will not be induced unless medically necessary, my OB will let me go until Apr. 10.... aka that could be very close if not ovverlap with when I give birth, and then I would have all 3 kids...
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November 19th, 2013, 09:14 AM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Southwest Chicago 'burbs
Posts: 278
My husband is not taking any time off- but he will be dead center of busy travel season so he has requested one week prior and 3 weeks after to not travel. once the baby comes, he will take vacation time to stay home for a week or so. I am pretty confident this will be enough. My biggest fear is January 1st is when busy travel season starts and I live in Chicago, so winter is awful, and I commute up to 3 hours a day. I feel like I will not be able to handle being pregnant, having other kids and working full time with a husband who is gone every Monday - thursday. And I will also dread when he starts traveling again because I feel like I will get lonely, being home with the baby and not having adult interaction much.
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November 19th, 2013, 10:14 AM
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 161
Ill have no income by then, and any of his time off is completely unpaid, so he wont take any (except when im in labor). So thats the downside, but the upside of that is he is allowed to take as much time off, whenever he wants. So if there are any unforseen problems, i know we have an option at least. Of course, we have our teens to help out a little too.

Thats great that your husband will be there for that first week. But to answer your other question, how long is optimal really depends on how youre feeling, and your confidence. I know i was also worried coming home with my second newborn and already had our first son. But looking back now, it seemed pretty easy. And in fact, i actually got to just enjoy my two-year-old more than ever, because our daily routines had to slow down, and the three of us were couped up playing at home together so much more in those early days. I remember it being the most peaceful time in my life, really.

And, i actually worked harder when my husband was there. Think about it, when he came home to help with the kids at night, i was 'free' to catch up on housework and anything i didn't get to all day. When he left the next morning, i gave myself more permission to relax, haha!
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November 19th, 2013, 10:15 AM
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Media, PA
Posts: 345
My DF isn't taking any time off. He will have that week off from classes if I go in on my due date. But he only work 20 hours a week so he will be home plenty.
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