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How to break the news...


Forum: 2014 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By Missymoos

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  #1  
February 28th, 2014, 10:05 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,283
So DH has been planning a spring break a trip down to San Francisco which is 9 1/2 hours from us. It would be nice to have a family vacation before the twins but he's included his grandmother. Well last year she went on spring break with us...her and I got into and DH and I many times. I also was still bleeding from a missed miscarriage d&c. Plus the lady lives with us. I feel like we can't take a family trip without her. Within this last week DH and I had a huge hour or so long fight due to her. I told him I didn't want to go because of her. Which he says I'm being selfish over. I don't feel I am..I don't want to subject myself to a week of inescapable stress. I'll be around 30weeks hours away from home and can't risk going into labor due to high stress. So I have decided that I am not going on spring break since I don't want to end up so far away and having contractions due to stress. So how do I break the news that I won't be going???
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  #2  
February 28th, 2014, 10:14 PM
PoppetsMom's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 168
Wow! That's a tough situation... Maybe if you approach it from the angle of not wanting to risk going into premature labor so far from home rather than the stress you feel around his grandmother, it might not be so harsh to hear. Don't even suggest she is a factor in your not wanting to go. Suggest that you need some down time, and with the baby being so close, and the trip so far you just aren't comfortable with the stress of travel so far from home.
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  #3  
March 1st, 2014, 07:42 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2013
Location: CA
Posts: 2,130
Blame it on the pregnancy. Say you will be 30weeks and cant handle the stress of traveling. (And no I think you are right on point about his grandmother/ family vacation. She went last yr. You should be able to go on vacation with just your immediate family (doug&kids)) Anyways if you really dont want to go, thats what I would say
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  #4  
March 1st, 2014, 10:07 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,283
It might sound harsh but she's the big reason I don't want to go. We don't get along and I know that wouldn't be good on the babies. Has it is they are already tracking my Braxton hicks that are getting stronger each time I have them. I almost couldn't get them to stop one day and they were about to send me to the hospital and they finally stopped. My uterus at my last appt was almost full term and I've reached the point that they are having me come in bi weekly and an ultrasound once a month that probably will go down to bi weekly or weekly very soon as I hit the third trimester.
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  #5  
March 1st, 2014, 02:04 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,283
He doesn't get it!!!! I'm just going to have to get a no travel order since he doesn't get what I am saying!!!
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  #6  
March 1st, 2014, 02:26 PM
Missymoos's Avatar 1st time Momma!
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Ontario (Canada)
Posts: 1,090
I was going to say - why don't you have a private talk with your doctor/MW and enlist their aid. If they back your desire to not travel at 30wks, esp. travel that will no doubt cause a lot of stress, then there is nothing that DH can really say about it. Doctor's orders!
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  #7  
March 1st, 2014, 08:49 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,283
That's what I'm going to have to do. He wanted to try talking again tomorrow about it and doesn't understand my point of view. He said"what are you afraid CA doesn't have any hospitals?...your going you didn't have a problem a month ago." One I'm an adult no one is going to tell me what I am going to do! Plain and simple I don't want to go now so I'm not and if I have to get my OB to back me up I **** well will!!
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