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OT - prayers needed


Forum: 2014 Playroom

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  • 2 Post By VallyD
  • 1 Post By ZeeWP

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  #1  
July 11th, 2014, 11:15 AM
laleighpop's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Austin, TX
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My mom is having an all out break down and we are considering whether she needs to be on suicide watch.There has been major drama from the moment I went into labor and we finally got her back at our house to spend some time with her grandson and she hasn't held him once. Things have come to a boiling point this morning and we have the family scrambling to get her a ticker back to GA tomorrow but in the mean time DH, MIL & BIL think we should get out of the house and give her some space (we WERE walking out the door to lunch - an invitation she refused).
My MIL took the baby out to her to kiss him good bye since she was talking about going to a hotel, and my mom lost it. I went out to tell her to calm down and give her a hug, ask (again) for her to stay, tell her she is not alone and she is loved etc etc and she hollered something about knocking the (expletive) out of MIL and her smug attitude. I lost control and slapped my mom. ***.
I know she isn't well and is having a breakdown but we really do not need this here right now - I JUST HAD A BABY. Where is this white trash BS coming from?!
My cousin had a complete breakdown and had to leave the house at midnight to watch a movie and cried through the whole thing just after having my mom there for 4 days. I can't send her BACK there - my cousin has been a freaking saint through my entire labor as our doula and in helping us get this house together. We joked the only way to repay her would be to give her our 1st born, I thought the least I could do was to get my mom out of her house and let her have a break from the mental case.


I am worried to leave the house only to return and find her having attempted suicide. Right now she is hurting and she blames me and wants me to hurt with her. MIL was worried about her doing something to the house but I know the ultimate goal would be to hurt ME. I just cannot go there right now - I have new priorities and my ability to not completely give in has only been seen as lack of compassion in her eyes.




My cousin just called and they booked her a flight at 7am tomorrow. She thinks she is fine for now so we are going to take her to a hotel by the airport when we get back from lunch.


Right now I want to pat myself on the back for not letting this screw with me (entirely) but who knows with my hormones lately - it might just come back with a vengeance at 2am while I am breastfeeding my son in the glider like it did the other night. UGH. FML.
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  #2  
July 11th, 2014, 11:32 AM
Dishersgirl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Oh how terrible. You really dont need that. Is there someone for her back home? I hope she finds someone to help her with this.
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  #3  
July 11th, 2014, 12:21 PM
razzledobe's Avatar <3
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holy crap how stressful!! What is she blaming you for? Why is she so upset with you? ugh so sorry for this...
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  #4  
July 11th, 2014, 12:23 PM
Earthy.Mama's Avatar .*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.
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I shudder reading this, sounds exactly like my mother ((hugs)) I hope this is figured out SOON and you're at peace ♥
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  #5  
July 11th, 2014, 12:23 PM
VallyD's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Time to say, EVERYBODY OUT.

What the hell is wrong with her?
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  #6  
July 11th, 2014, 04:24 PM
laleighpop's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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It started with everyone and I mean EVERYONE showing up at the hospital Sat morning before the doc had even checked me to see if the cervadil had helped me progress at all. When I found out I hadn't I had a room of 8 ppl ready for baby & it made me feel pressured. I wasn't having any notable contractions yet so I casually mentioned that I didn't want everyone hanging out all day waiting... I knew then it was going to be a long haul. I told my mom that my BIL was bringing my car up so she'd have a vehicle to come/go as had been discussed in the wks before her arrival. She flat out said "I'm not going anywhere" in a very confrontational manner. *** I had said for mos that it would be open door unless I decided otherwise when I needed to focus.When I wanted time to focus & was trying to make progress before pit my cousin helped me get everyone out. My mom proceeded to the 1st floor lobby where she didn't return until 24+hrs later when I was about to push after I had asked for/about her 5x throughout my labor only to learn she was *****ing every person out that went to talk to her on my behalf. She refused to come up until I CALLED HER MYSELF. While I was in ****** labor!!!!!!!
When I was laying on the table holding Lincoln & hemorrhaging to the point "surgery" & "blood transfusion" we're being discussed by the doc, I actually APOLOGIZED to her & repeated that the invitations had been from me, she actually waived me off & warned me we would be discussing my behavior when it was all over.
I didn't see her for a few days & my cuz said she felt she needed an INVITE to come see her grandson. So again I took the time to call her & invite her. She basically scoffed at me. Next day my cuz was ready to load her up & drive her back to our house but such a tantrum ensued by my mom that required ANOTHER invite to prove she was wanted here.
So she arrives a day late & I show her Lincoln & said the midwife suggested she just hang a shirt on the porch to wear when she smokes so her clothes don't smell when she holds baby.
After that my moms attitude just spiraled as every invitation to conversation was met with a snide remark & she has yet to hold the baby.


She is supposed to be leaving for a hotel soon & flying out tomorrow.


The woman is nucking futs.
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  #7  
July 11th, 2014, 06:20 PM
Earthy.Mama's Avatar .*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.
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Nope. My mom pulled that same crap at my sister's wedding and on the day my grandmother died. Like literally, she was pissed that she couldn't call and get info from the hospital but my sister was allowed to (POA) so when I said we had to go NOW because she was dying my mom threw a fit and blah blah blah all the attention wasn't on her blah blah blah, then things got physical later that day and I hadn't seen/spoken to my mother since, she's passed now from suicide. Serious mental illness there.

Sorry you're going through that ((hugs)). Family is family, but sometimes it's best to cut bad ppl off....
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  #8  
July 11th, 2014, 08:01 PM
VallyD's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I agree with Jackie, some people need cutting off. I'm so sorry that happened to you Laura.
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  #9  
July 11th, 2014, 08:18 PM
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Wow, that is all insane. I'm sorry she's acting like that!
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  #10  
July 11th, 2014, 08:42 PM
ZeeWP's Avatar On to the second!
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Location: Las Vegas, NV
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I am so sorry Laura. My mom (and dad) tried pulling **** like this before... and although , mental illness can explain some of it, it does not excuse her selfish behavior at all. This is how she shows her daughter and grandson she loves them?

I am selfishly glad my parents have shown their cruel side years ago... they will not be able to ruin my moments with my child or show her their assholeness.


Put yourself, your DH and Lincoln first. Your moms needs and rants come second to that. I know... its hard when someone is so out of balance from normal, but all you can do is take care of yourself!
::: off of soapbox::::
Earthy.Mama likes this.
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