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help im having my first freak out!!!


Forum: March 2014 Playroom

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  • 2 Post By jes81878
  • 1 Post By Alaska Baby14

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  #1  
October 3rd, 2013, 10:10 AM
madis-mama17's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Utah
Posts: 411
I'm totally having a nervous panic moment!! I have my 2 yr old DD and with her it was easy!! She got 100% of my attention and taking care of her was a change but it was manageable!! How do I add number 2 to the mix?? How do you split your time?? Moms with more than one please help me calm down!!!!!!!!!
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  #2  
October 3rd, 2013, 10:36 AM
jes81878's Avatar Jennifer
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Burlington, KY
Posts: 613
I have been feeling very overwhelmed this week over the same issue, but I have a 14 year old, 10 year old, and we are having twins. My 10 year old plays select soccer, and he has practice 4 days a week and games on the weekend...that require a lot of travel and weekends in a hotel at times. I'm not sure how we are going to manage that; it should be interesting to say the least,lol.

My boys were 4 years apart, and there was some jealously from my oldest in the early months, but it worked out fine. I would suggest you include your oldest in as much as caring for the baby as possible. Make her feel needed and brag on what a good job she does. Also, this will be a big adjustment for her, and you still make time for mommy and her alone time....be patient and understanding.
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  #3  
October 3rd, 2013, 05:13 PM
Alaska Baby14's Avatar Gonna be a family of 4!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Eagle River, Alaska
Posts: 1,390
I'm kinda feeling the same way. Kayla will be 16 months when this baby is born and I loved being able to give 100% of my attention to her!!! She's becoming more independent now tho and my husband is awesome at helping.. So I hope it's not TOO overwhelming!
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  #4  
October 3rd, 2013, 10:08 PM
Sarah:Marie:IVF:Mommy's Avatar Proud mom of Leiland
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Southern CA, Born and raised in MI
Posts: 10,196
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Same fears here. I don't have any family around either so I know my son will have a big adjustment when its not just him and I anymore. I think he will do ok since he is easy going. I am terrified about handling the lack of sleep. And that hubby will deploy when baby is just a couple months old. Blah. I know it will all work out, but it scares me a little too.
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  #5  
October 4th, 2013, 06:17 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Southwest Chicago 'burbs
Posts: 278
When you are faced with no other option but to make it work, you find a way to make it work. That is the beauty of being a mother! When the baby comes, things will fall into place. You will have some beautiful chaos- that comes with every family whether 1 or 6 babies. Just with all things in life, you settle in and do what you have to do and it becomes the new norm before you even can blink an eye. At one point, I had a son just starting half day kindergarten, I worked nights, I had a 23 month old, and just gave birth to twins,(three in diapers and I was nursing the twins!) and was in a failing marriage. Something switched over into survival mode for me for a few years, and I made it through the craziness. Now I have one in college, one in high school, two in middle school, one in elementary school, and a baby on the way, and a new husband ... I wonder how I can be everything to everyone, but I know I will just make it work. You will do great!
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  #6  
October 4th, 2013, 06:29 AM
Regular
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 76
I'm absolutely crapping myself about the prospect of a third. But then I'm happy with the two I have and this pregnancy was a shock. I don't want to get up during the nights or breastfeed for another year or feel like everything is going backwards when my youngest is finally becoming so independent. She will be starting school next Sept and at nursery whilst I work currently. Everything feels so smooth for the first time in years and it's like I'm reaching another hump in the road. I guess I am totally overwhelmed and have been suffering a lot of anxiety about starting back at square 1 with another newborn. My 2 are 6 & 3 and will be 6 & 4 by the time I give birth. Jumping from 1 to 2 children did not worry me that much, but you are jumping into the unknown and so I understand there must be some feelings of anxiety with this. Three for me seems impossible, not in the sense that I cannot take care of three children, but more of the fact that I think I will struggle emotionally. I wish you all the best, I know what it's like to worry and panic about a new addition!
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  #7  
October 4th, 2013, 08:42 AM
madis-mama17's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Utah
Posts: 411
Thanks ladies!! I'm feel a lot more calm today! I just had a day yesterday!! My house was a wreck! My DD has 3 new teeth coming in (she got them way late but they are super healthy) my husband was so crabby and I realized when I go into labor I have no one to take my DD!! All of our family lives 2-3 hrs away! So I talked to my hubby about my fears and his attitude completely changed!! He really calmed me down and said it will all work out. I still don't see how but everything will be ok!! Thanks for all your kindness!! I LOVE JM!!!
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  #8  
October 4th, 2013, 12:28 PM
maybethistime's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 631
My boys were 4 years apart, and there was some jealously from my oldest in the early months, but it worked out fine. I would suggest you include your oldest in as much as caring for the baby as possible. Make her feel needed and brag on what a good job she does. Also, this will be a big adjustment for her, and you still make time for mommy and her alone time....be patient and understanding.

I agree ^
I put my older one in charge of "keeping baby safe" and made it alot about him. I also tried to never blame not being able to do things like going to the park on the baby and his schedule so that my older one wouldn't resent the baby. My first 2 were 4 years apart so it was fairly easy to negotiate. This time there is 2 years, so I'm not too sure. I'm hoping the independent streak will kick in for my soon to be 2 year old and he won't be so clingy by the time baby is born...
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