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OT: why do I do it?


Forum: April 2014 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By mommy2b43
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  • 2 Post By mommy2b43
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  #1  
March 24th, 2014, 06:43 AM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Does anyone ever post something to Facebook innocently and then get some judgy remarks? Lol I'm always doing it- I don't know if it's because I have lots of older and/or catholic friends on my list but really? Just keep the negative thoughts to yourself. I'm way too post-y on Facebook though so it's my own fault but I posted a picture of my kids' very disorganized, cluttered, unwalkable playroom yesterday. So, half the people are like "yeah I feel ya" but then I get the "you have too many toys" bunch. Admittedly, we have too many toys. But, really? I often feel like I just need to get rid of Facebook because no matter what I do I always feel like there's someone out there waiting to say "you're not doing it good enough." I think it's my own issue because I *know* I'm overly sensitive. At least I've learned my lesson and when posts like that happen I just delete them and move on instead of trying to argue about it!

Am I the only one who gets like that? Ugh. I need to get a life so I don't waste so much of it online!!! Being sick for 8 months on and off doesn't help though!
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  #2  
March 24th, 2014, 07:04 AM
MrsPalumbo's Avatar Super Mommy
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I'm with you. There are only a few choice ppl on my friends list that are like that and they just so happen to be family. FB has caused a couple of family fights, but these are ppl that I would tell to their face exactly what I'm telling them on FB or texts. It's a shame you can't pick your family sometimes
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  #3  
March 24th, 2014, 08:35 AM
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YES. This happens to me ALL THE TIME and makes me crazy. I post things that are only positive and upbeat in nature. We have so much crap going on in our lives but family and community members are on my Facebook and we don't need more of our family drama going around town. So, like I said, happy positive things only.

A few weeks / months ago, I was joking about being pregnant and married to a dairy farmer, and some other farm wives pitched in joking about their husbands the midwives as well. Somebody else went own to say something about milk production and I responded with "don't worry, DH will have me on a seventeen percent protein ration and 2.7 litres of water a day -- I'll be the highest producer in the county!" CLEARLY this is a joking conversation and some other preachy person posted "well, if only breastfeeding was as easy as producing milk"

Really? Like, come on. Clearly we are all farm wives, and clearly we are JOKING. Ugh. I hate it when people do that.

Anyhow, all this to say, I hear you and I'm irritated by it too! It really makes me censore what I say!
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  #4  
March 24th, 2014, 08:40 AM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Oh I feel ya- family and Facebook may be the worst combo ever sigh. I try. It's funny though- you'd think with all the complaints people have of Facebook presenting an unrealistic "perfection" people would appreciate a picture of reality
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  #5  
March 24th, 2014, 08:51 AM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
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Most of mine center around my choices for induction or pumping or car seats. It drives me nuts. I don't post articles , these are fights on my pictures. I posted a picture of a text conversation with DH when I got my new pump thinking it was funny how he reacted and all the sudden a FTM with a 4 month old had all the "answers" when I exclusively pumped for over 6 months with DD and partially pumped for over a year. I posted a picture of DD falling asleep in her car seat and people were asking why I chose that seat over others and other safety things...it was in my front room not even in the car and it was obvious. I post that I am getting induced and all the sudden everyone is asking for my personal medical history as to why I would do that. It drives me nuts.
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  #6  
March 24th, 2014, 08:51 AM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I try to censor and I still get it lol. I joked about how I wished I could share the miracle of child bearing with men (during my pukiest time) and I get a couple "oh it *is* a miracles" (which I rolled my eyes at because I love the fact that I carry my babies but it isn't fun) but the one that really got me was when someone said "well then next time you should adopt"...so because I spend 9 months nauseous, miserable and incapacitated in one way or another- I should adopt? No, I love my babies- there's a reason I do this over and over. I'm thankful for my ability to get pregnant. But I hate being pregnant and there's nothing wrong with me saying that on Facebook lol
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  #7  
March 24th, 2014, 08:55 AM
NehaT's Avatar Super Mommy
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I totally understand! These days I visit facebook, check the things posted by others and log out. But even if I posted something and some one comments idiotically, I totally ignore that person rather than deleting my post. Its a free country..i hardly care if any outsider comments negatively. I normally get pissed off only when someone tags me to any sort of pics or comments which are not related to me. I mean come on, if I want to see your post, I will see. No need of tagging. I made change in setting for tag review and people started asking me why.. I just said..my choice of privacy!!
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  #8  
March 24th, 2014, 09:06 AM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Oh the induction conversation and breastfeeding...I said in passing I hoped I had time for an epidural (personal choice) and someone goes "well if your labors are that fast, do you need an epidural" weeeeell if we have to get technical none of us *need* an epidural but I want one. So...what was the point of that comment??? Lol

I delete for my own sanity because otherwise it annoys me and I am tempted to start arguing- I'd rather not argue...lol
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  #9  
March 24th, 2014, 09:09 AM
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  #10  
March 24th, 2014, 09:21 AM
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I have no filter on my mouth or typing fingers any more, so if someone says something rude or out of line I call them on it. Lol...it's probably a good thing I'm working for our family business or I might have been fired by this point . My fb seems like it is filled with a bunch of internet educated yuppies who think they have the answer to everything cause they read an article about it. Don't get me wrong, I am all about educating ourselves, but I also thing we should talk to experts etc rather than taking the word of a mommy blogger with an opinion. This is another reason no one knows baby's name yet lol...people don't think about how their comments affect us, or they simply don't care. What ever happened to just smiling, saying bless your heart and then waiting to gossip BEHIND the persons back???
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  #11  
March 24th, 2014, 09:38 AM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
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Ame, yes! I have siblings that I really hate the kids names. They don't know it because I choose to be nice and not tell them. I got a lot of "oh like Dorian Grey" comments when we announced his name. SMH.
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  #12  
March 24th, 2014, 10:06 AM
isawastar's Avatar Super Mommy
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YES. I have even had comments to my face, with my MIL talking about things I have posted as though it was someone else who had posted them. I get frustrated because it seems like everyone else can post whatever they want but anything I could post about is complained about.

One friend even went on a rant about how pregnant people would mention their being pregnant, and if she saw one more status about pregnancy or one more ultrasound she was going to vomit. I try to avoid posting anything with any sort of view point because my views tend to be a little different than the majority of my friends, which is fine with me and I just ignore their posts on certain topics but as soon as I say something I get jumped because evidently respect of difference in opinions is rare. People can't just discuss things, it has to get heated.

All in all, I end up censoring myself quite a bit. I really wish I had that ability to just not care, but I'm far too sensitive. I love facebook though, and how it lets me keep up with people I'd not otherwise get to (my cousin who's moved to Japan, for example, or those out of state) - it's an amazing tool that allows my over-anxious self to socialize and keep up with people in a way that is comfortable for me. The people who are annoying to me I hide from my news feed and check on periodically... and I really wish that others would do the same instead of complaining about what they're reading. Then there's also always the "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" idea that more people need to adopt!
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  #13  
March 24th, 2014, 01:39 PM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I do the same thing with hiding- that's what it's there for! If I complain too much or my thoughts/comments/postings about my kids whatever annoys you- use hide!! Or unfriend me for that matter lol. I'd rather have someone unfriend me than write me a nasty message!

(Granted the comments were not nasty just kinda unnecessary...I mean don't judge me because I'm not good at giving away toys lol)
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Last edited by mommy2b43; March 24th, 2014 at 06:54 PM.
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  #14  
March 24th, 2014, 04:36 PM
Jessimaaka's Avatar Pink in a house of Blue
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Yeah, I share very little on FB because I don't want to read judgy comments. I just send links via PM to those I think might be interested if something shows up in my newsfeed. One of the few things I will share is car seat safety information...but I also never post any pics of DS in his seat anymore since everyone is an "expert". I hate posting much at all because MIL is an odd duck and makes the most inappropriate comments...I try to catch them all and delete them and she doesn't seem to get the hint!
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  #15  
March 24th, 2014, 06:38 PM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Oh man- car seat safety is one of my pet peeves lol not because I don't agree but because it's another issue for everyone to comment on- I don't post car seat pictures either unless it's just a head shot and you can't see how my child is buckled (which I'm pretty anal about so they are buckled properly). Ah man, but I don't discuss rear facing/forward facing etc. I keep mine rear facing as long as we can both stand it lol but when I have to wrestle the 2 year old into the car every day I figure a forward facing child is better than a distracted mama because all said 2 year old does is scream and scream and scream (I listened to justin beibers baby on repeat for like 2 weeks straight but eventually even that failed to stop the screaming lol).
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