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  #1  
May 13th, 2009, 05:39 PM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My family has been great and understanding, our friends too. But, Iw as looking at some responses on my husbands flickr site. And some of the comments sounded like bereavement cards, and then I wondered, will I get them in the mail? I will appreciate the gesture, but it might make me not want to check the mail. So I wanted to know if people send cards? I am not sure how I feel about it.
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  #2  
May 13th, 2009, 05:45 PM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think it depends. A lot of people did send me condolence cards... but then personally I really liked getting them, and saved them all, and my friends knew that.
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  #3  
May 13th, 2009, 05:47 PM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think I will like having them. I just don't know if I want to keep seeing them in the mailbox. So knowing that they might be there will help me. If I saw them before I thought about it, I might have been sad.
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  #4  
May 13th, 2009, 05:48 PM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I know what you mean.... things that caught me off-guard were the hardest.
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  #5  
May 13th, 2009, 05:59 PM
SimplyJenalee's Avatar Super Mommy
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I had a really hard time with the cards I received because it was around Christmas time and I was EXPECTING Christmas Cards...but then I would open it up and it would not be a Christmas Card... It got to the point that I just had my mom open my mail for me (she stayed with us for a month afterwards).
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  #6  
May 13th, 2009, 06:47 PM
BellaBellski's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I only got one, from my mom. No one else even really acknowledged that it happened, which I think was alot worse I wanted people to acknowledge what happened.
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  #7  
May 13th, 2009, 06:56 PM
Mom 2 Avery's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I got three cards with Avery and was touched by them all.

I have to warn you about other mail that will catch you off guard. If you've signed up for any baby-related catalogues, insurance, etc... I still get Gerber Insurance offers...

God bless and give you peace!
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  #8  
May 13th, 2009, 06:57 PM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My friends and family have all been very supportive. My mom bought David and I both prayer lockets, we have a small piece of his christening gown to put in it. She also bought stuff for the kids to make a card for him to put in with his stuff. She has been so good, and I know that this is so heard for her, not only because she lost a grandchild, but because you can't imagine seeing your children suffering. For the most part our family has not had much tragedy. She has not had to see us go through such hard things in her life. We have been so blessed, so I know this is hard for her to cope with too.
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  #9  
May 13th, 2009, 07:31 PM
littlebeansmommy's Avatar Super Mommy
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I got a ton of cards in the mail. Of course, we now live in a different state than our families and so my family posted the obituary in my hometown newspaper. A lot of people from there sent cards. I liked getting them at the beginning. It helped to know people cared.
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  #10  
May 13th, 2009, 07:37 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
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I got maybe 10 or 12 cards. When I was too upset, I left them and opened them later. I love them and saved them in Ethan's memory box.

I'm very sorry you have to be here, but I'm glad you found us.
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  #11  
May 13th, 2009, 11:37 PM
claire1979's Avatar mummy to a special angel
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i got quite a few cards and i liked them, i liked eading the verses although i was very sad but i have kept all of them they are in he memoy box which i get out and read
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  #12  
May 14th, 2009, 04:44 AM
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I got 3 or so and at the time it was a bit hard to see them but I appreciate them now.
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  #13  
May 14th, 2009, 05:15 AM
heathernoel's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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The cards mean SO much. The plants (which I prefer to flowers) are growing, and make me smile. I've received a scant few with Jonah, which actually hurts, because those cards mean that someone recognizes the pain our loss has caused, and that someone recognizes that the world lost a saint.
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  #14  
May 14th, 2009, 05:21 AM
BakingMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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We got alot of cards, but they all came the first two weeks after. Beyond that time period, there were no more. They were from our family and church; a good number of people from church sent cards, so I think that is why we got so many.
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  #15  
May 14th, 2009, 07:20 AM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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We also got a lot of cards. I loved them. It meant people awknowledged my loss. I also found out about a number of others who had had stillbirths and I wouldn't have known had they not sent me a card. I still have them all and look at them every once in a while.
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  #16  
May 14th, 2009, 08:09 AM
AliciaF's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I got a lot of cards too and they helped. I have them all saved in Clark's memory box.

As another poster mentioned, be prepared for the mail that will come in the next few months. The formula samples and diaper samples and the like. They will catch you off guard
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  #17  
May 14th, 2009, 08:37 AM
Gayle's Avatar Veteran
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I only got cards from my side of the family. They all were so wonderful. His side doesn't even acknowledge her. I've saved them all. They were so wonderful to get for me. My mom was here and got the mail most every single day so she hid all the diaper samples and formula samples. I never even knew that had come until one day I went and got them and she told me she had been throwing them out.
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  #18  
May 14th, 2009, 08:54 AM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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I got a lot of cards too. I am a member of another (non-pregnancy-related) online community, and one of the sweet ladies there took it upon herself to have everyone who wanted to send a card to her and she forwarded them on to me. They're all in Cora's scrapbook. I still pull them out and look at/read them sometimes.
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  #19  
May 14th, 2009, 01:54 PM
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I received quite a few cards, two potted plants, a music box, a locket with her name and birth date on it, and a beautiful lilac tree which I am watching bloom for the first time. None of these things hurt me because I was already hurting, but they made me feel like other people acknowledged our loss. What I mean is that it was still fresh, so it didn't catch me off guard. I agree with everyone else, the baby updates, formula samples, baby bumps, and off-handed references to pregnancies are worse. I will be honest, seeing her lilac tree bloom makes me cry, but I am happy because it represents her to me.
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  #20  
May 14th, 2009, 02:19 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
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I delivered so early, that is probably why I never got diaper/formula samples. But the parenting magazine I had bought a subscription to arrived on the day Ethan was diagnosed - DH took it from me and hid it somewhere.
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