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I know...its so hard. My family is throwing me a diaper shower this weekend and part of me wants to give all of the diapers I get to my cousin who is 17 and just had a baby....I hate that I always think in What if's....
I feel you ladies. The girls in my DDC are talking about all of the things they are going to buy their babies. I'm thinking about what i can buy Squirt that will fit in a memory box in case we lose him/her too.
Hugs, Its so hard. I never had any baby showers for my last two since I was so against having one for Owen. I didn't want to sit there and ohh and ahh over gifts I thought at the time I might never be able to use. I did have one after Owen was born but that's it.
Owen, Avery, Samantha and forever missing Jake born still 08/01/99.
Oh gosh, that's hard. I't hurts my heart that you even had to have those thoughts go through your head. I'm sorry this is our "new normal".
My friend threw us a baby shower on Saturday, July 19th 2008. On Monday July 21st 2008, the doctor couldn't find Noah's heartbeat. I had the haunting thought go through my head that he was already dead at the shower and didn't hear one word I was saying to him and Julia during the shower. All those twin gifts we had received ... and on the Sunday evening before that Monday, we had set up the play yards in our bedroom, side by side, awaiting their arrival ...
What memories. The following week, we were returning things to Babies R Us, explaining why we didn't have receipts for these things we were returning that also didn't have their original packaging. It was horrible.
I wish I could tell you to think positively, but then I'd have to take my own advice and that's so hard to do
Thank you to Jaidynsmum for my beautiful siggie!
I'm Barb, Mom to Angel on Earth Julia Rose (7*22*08), her twin brother Angel in Heaven Noah (7*22*08), and rainbow baby Sydney Noelle (12*4*09).
*a special 'thank you' to all the blinkie creators for their talents*
I am so sorry you are feleing that way. I can only imagine.
Sometimes I think I want everything if I get pregnant again. I want to do all the baby/pregnancy stuff because I want to celebrate the life, but then I think about stuff like this, and how maybe I won't need it, and it is so sad I jsut can't think about it again.
When they persisted in questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "Let the person among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." John 8:7 Sail Back to Me