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You know I used to be close with my mom for a long time. We had so much in common, but now things that she says just drive me crazy. These days I just want to cut short any conversations I have with her. She was away on vacation the past few weeks, she came back yesterday and asked me if I called some relatives while she was away. I told her that I didn't because I don't really feel like calling anybody and that I'm not in the mood. She was like "you're still not in the mood?" I just couldn't beleive she said that and I told her " it's only been 3 months, what do you expect". I still don't get it. It's like she waits for certain amount of time to pass for things to get back to normal. I was gonna tell her that whether it's 3 months or 3 years, it'll still be here and nothing's going to change how I feel. Ogh... just makes me so mad. I actually was at work when this happened, and I just went outside 'cause I needed to cry so bad.
Thanks for reading, just makes me feel better to get it out of my system.
I'm sorry honey. It's hard for people to understand that this is a permanent part of our lives now. Life isn't going to "go back to normal," because that normal is completely shattered and gone. You have to learn how to live with a part of you gone. No amount of pretending is going to make you whole again. And someone who has never been through it won't get that (and some people who have, too )
She needs some lessons on grief. I am sure there is a book that you could get her that talks about the normal grieving process and how long it takes, etc. When we were in teh hospital they actually had literature that they gave us, it included one for grandparents. I wonder if there is a hospital near you that orders stuff like that and would let you have one. I suppose if you contacted a support group you could get information.
And what Brittanie said is so darn true, even people that have been through it don't always 'get it' either.
When they persisted in questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "Let the person among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." John 8:7 Sail Back to Me