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That in about 27 days it's going to be 2 years since I've lost the girls. What a freaking journey the past two years have been. It hurts so much so sit here and think it took me this long to get pregnant and finally believe that I get to take home a baby at the end. I just miss my girls so much. I was so looking forward to all the joys and upsets of having twins. I feel like I still have no answers as to what happened and why I went into labor so early. I'm so mad at the perinatologist for being so heartless.
I'm so mad for my m/c's. I know nothing could have been done to prevent them, but why couldn't I have a subsequent pregnancy that went with no issues. My friends can do it, why couldn't I? Why was I punished for 2 years for just wanting a baby?
I am thankful that I am pregnant now. Regardless of the sex, I want this baby to spend the next 6 months baking in my uterus and pop out only when s/he is ready too. I am going to enjoy this pregnancy and not be bothered by any ones comments, including my MOTHER'S (she can be mean). I will try my best to not b*tch and moan about how miserable I feel during my pregnancy and I will relish every moment of it. I promise to be the best mom I can be.
I will never forget my babies. I will always love them and will always tell them that. I will always remember their special days. My life will now never be "complete" cause my babies will always be missing from it, but my heart will always be filled with their love.
Oh honey. It's not a punishment. I wish nothing more than your subsequents could have been flawless. If there was something to be punished for, it wouldn't be you standing in your shoes. And this forum wouldn't be made up of all the wonderful women that are here.
I've been praying for you. I'm so glad everything looks so good right now! A mother never forgets her children. You have every right to do whatever you need to to remember them. I'm sorry that your mother's not very supportive.
And I give you permission to complain if you need to. If anyone deserves to be able to, it's you.