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Forum: Stillbirth

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  #1  
December 4th, 2010, 12:44 PM
claire1979's Avatar mummy to a special angel
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ladies

im over the moon that my sisters little girl came into this word safe and healthy, she had her friday 3rd weighing 7lb 2oz called megan. i stress the whole time someone is pregnant its literally hell for me!!! when i was cuddling her i was secretly crying inside i miss jessica so much even 5 1/2 years later i get so emotional when holding newborn baby girls.

she is just gorgeous thou.
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  #2  
December 4th, 2010, 04:47 PM
austinmommy3's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I am so glad she made it safely into everyone's arms! I stress out when people are pregnant I know, and being pregnant right now I am a nervous mess daily!
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  #3  
December 5th, 2010, 01:54 AM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Such a blessing for her to be born safely!

I have been around more lately, really thinking about my little guy a lot right now. It seems the 'firsts' this year are harder. I guess maybe because we should have just had his birthday? He would be getting ready to walk and just at such a fun age now.
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  #4  
December 5th, 2010, 12:40 PM
littlebeansmommy's Avatar Super Mommy
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I'm around too, but I've been super busy with my oldest and preschool and the holiday's....it's just been crazy.

I'm having a really hard time with Christmas this year and missing my little one. I think even more so than last year. I think I've come to the conclusion that it's because I was soooo preoccupied with doctor's appointments and being pregnant that I really didn't have time to think about my DS's first Christmas. This year things are a lot less stressful and with another little one in the house, seeing him reminds me of what we never experienced with our 2nd DS. Sigh. I was doing really good until the tree went up!
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  #5  
December 5th, 2010, 02:04 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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I'm around.

All things considered I'm doing very well. I just started my 3rd trimester and am starting to feel overwhelmed and nervous about the baby coming, but at the same time I'm excited. Everything is going super smooth with the pregnancy and my little man appears in all ways to be healthy which is such a wonderful blessing.

Lucy's 1st birthday is coming up in about a month. I think of her often.
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  #6  
December 5th, 2010, 02:49 PM
AndyBee's Avatar Super Mommy
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I'm here, never really knowing what to say. My co-worker is pregnant right now, and got some maybe bad news at her u/s. Fluid in the kidneys, so of course she came to me. I'm just not strong enough to support her though. I know she needs comfort and reassurance, but I can't giver her that.
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  #7  
December 5th, 2010, 03:06 PM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Amanda, even if you can't be an emotional support, can you help her to get the resources she might need if the outcome is bad?

I wish I had known about NILMDTS, to get more handprints and footprints, to bring something special to have a photo with, etc. No one wants to have to know this stuff, but knowing it can prevent regrets later. Even if you think it would upset her to get the links and ideas, maybe someone else that is close to both of you could help her out.
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  #8  
December 5th, 2010, 04:27 PM
AndyBee's Avatar Super Mommy
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Due to the nature of our work, we are all very well connected with bereavement and loss support. One of our nurses has a sister that is a NILMDTS photographer. Child life does hand prints and foot prints, they really do a great job. I agree she should know, luckily she already does.

It's not that I don't want to support her, it's just that my heart is still so raw, I can't handle her. That may seem rude, but I can barely handle my own emotions. And the fact that her baby could be perfectly fine, well, I find it almost rude on her part to even bring it up to me. It's not like she knows for sure that any thing is even really wrong, let alone life threatning.

I'm not in a place where I can give support, and I wish that our loss had been more private here at work.
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  #9  
December 5th, 2010, 05:21 PM
Ben,Logan&Kaitlin'sMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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glad she arrived safely Claire

I am around - just busy
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  #10  
December 5th, 2010, 05:22 PM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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If she is already able to find a place for support and has an understanding of how to handle the situation if her baby does die, then you should not feel bad about not being able to be there for her right now. You loss is so fresh that it is understandable. If she doesn't get it then she is the one being selfish.
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  #11  
December 6th, 2010, 07:59 AM
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Meghan, when was Colm's due date again. I know it was close to Eli's so I'm just wondering.
Anyway, I'm here and I'm doing all right. I did have a hard time for a couple of days around Eli's due date (12/4). He would be a year old. And it's hard to think of that around Christmas time, he would be old enough to enjoy Christmas this year.
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  #12  
December 6th, 2010, 08:49 AM
Mom 2 Avery's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I'm still bouncing around...can't believe this year is gone already!!!
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  #13  
December 6th, 2010, 08:52 AM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Colm was due Sept 9th.
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When they persisted in questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "Let the person among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." John 8:7
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  #14  
December 6th, 2010, 09:39 AM
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I'm here, new but here... Not too happy about the holidays again this year, but am trying my best to try this year because of DS & DD...
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  #15  
December 6th, 2010, 11:26 AM
lex1078's Avatar Waiting patiently....
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I"m around, lurking more than anything.
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  #16  
December 6th, 2010, 01:09 PM
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I'm sorry I haven't been around much. We're ttc again and I'm really excited but super nervous.

I hope this doesn't sound weird but we'r going to see Elijah in about a week to take some flowers up and I can't wait. I just want to be near him again, I miss him so much and all I can see is how much he looked like Ethanael. They could have passed for twins
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  #17  
December 6th, 2010, 09:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AndyBee View Post
It's not that I don't want to support her, it's just that my heart is still so raw, I can't handle her. .
This is completely normal and not something you should feel bad about. You are still sifting through your own grief. It took me a long time to be able to deal with anyone's problems besides my own after Lucy passed. I just didn't have the energy for it. It took all of my energy to just get out of bed and get through the day without breaking down.
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  #18  
December 7th, 2010, 06:54 AM
Aeterna's Avatar Super Speshil
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Still here. Doing pretty good. Duncan's 2nd 'angelversary' was a few weeks ago. He was due in December. It's bittersweet. Henry turns a year on the 26th.
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  #19  
December 7th, 2010, 08:01 PM
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I'm here but busy and not doing too well emotionslly
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  #20  
December 11th, 2010, 11:57 PM
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December sucks. It's been really hard for me this year. More so then usual
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