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Hi! My name is Liliana, and I found this forum by googling. I lost a child last month!
I was pregnant with identical twin girls. I had my c-section sheduled for March 28th, but on March 23 rd I went for my last U/S and NST and they couldn't find the heartbeat of one baby. They make the U/S and worst happen, the baby B was dead. The doctors send me to the hopsital and they make me a emergency c-section. I was so scare, I just keep thinking on my other baby because it was a possibility she could have some problems if was blood transfusion. When they took the baby A (Emma) and she cried, i felt a relief but then I felt a pressure when they took baby B (Grace), it was a silence....
She had the cord around the neck multiple times. We saw Emma, my DH pick her up and bring her to me for I kiss her and then the NICU staff came to take her because they wanna to do some exams on her to make sure everything was fine with her! Then we went to recovery room where they bring Grace for we say goodbye to her! I couldn't pick her up but my DH and my sister-in-law did. She was like Emma, and she still was pink just the lips were purple! she was an angel sleeping! I still don't understand why this happen? Why God took my baby?
I have a 4 years old daughter, she knew about having twins, so it was difficult explain to her what happen! She went visit me and she just saw one baby, she ask me where was Grace. We said Grace is an angel in the sky, she is on a star looking for her, but this age is complicated and there was many why's, and we couldn't explain!
The nights at hospital were difficult, I just cryed, I felt so empty.
The good news is Emma is healthy baby.
We make a small service for Grace, I wasn't present because I didn't get my disharge from hospital on time and my family said that I shouldn't go because it was very cold.
I know alt least I get out of the hospital with one baby, but it is still difficult because I always going to look Emma and see Grace!
I'm so sorry for the passing of your baby Grace. I can't imagine the different emotions you must be expirencing. I hope that you can find some time to mourn and have peace, even though you are busy with a newborn.
BTW I'm an identical twin too. I don't know what I would do w/ out my sister. I'm sure that Emma will always miss her sister.
DD Brooklynn 8-4-01
DD Libby 6-18-04
DS Gavin 8-20-08
DS Carter born still 3-2-11 (20 weeks)
It's a GIRL!!! EDD 3-6-12
There are other ladies who post here occasionally who have lost one twin. It's got to be such a difficult place, since people tend to view it as not "as much" of a tragedy, since you still have a baby.
thank you all! It is a mixture of sad and happiness.
I like the name Emma Grace, but I named Emma Teresa because it's my grandma middle name, and when i was in that situation, i just pray to my grandma for at least Emma will be healthy.