We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
It's been almost 2 years since Ella's death now...I'm about to have a baby (due a day after her birthday), and I still have a hard time seeing other babies...Tonight at my daughter's soccer practice one of the mom's was there with her newborn daughter...I had such a hard time seeing her, and talking to her, or even looking at the baby...Maybe because it was a girl and it's the closest i've been to a newborn baby girl? Is it going to be hard for me to even see my own baby? I've seen newborns from a distance lately, and it hasn't bothered me...I don't know why I have this sad feeling from today...I'm now worried about how i'm going to react when I see/hold my own baby.
I haven't been pregnant since Mary, but from talking to other Moms online it sounds like the grief from losing one child hasn't interfered with bonding with another. *hug* I'm sorry you have to go through this.
i was the same hun but then when i held keeley i just cried my eyes out and just so relieved that she was alive.... only someone in our shoes will understand when we say ''that she was alive'' the love was instant...of course your going to be sad for ella when you hold him as i was for jessica.
I agree whole heartedly with Claire. Ceilidh was my first baby, so every pregnancy after my first was fraught with fear. It got easier to handle pregnancy and any fear over bonding with each subsequent baby, but during my second pregnancy I was on edge. The first question I asked when Elijah was born was "Is she alive?" As soon as I heard her scream the place down all I could say was "She's alive" over and over again through floods of tears. You will cherish this little boy hun, have no fear of that.
I agree with the others. Grief makes it different, but not harder to bond. Now, when Erin was born I felt like I had to start over in my grief for Cora because Cora was my first and I didn't actually know what I was losing, so everything Erin did made me grieve for those moments with Cora. So there will be a bit of that coming back to you I think.
But there will still be that mommy bond with your baby when you get him in your arms.
I'm glad to hear the replies of the mom's who chimed in. I've worried this same thing. I'm due a few days after I had Carter, and I'm worried that missing him will make it difficult to be happy about this baby's arrival.
DD Brooklynn 8-4-01
DD Libby 6-18-04
DS Gavin 8-20-08
DS Carter born still 3-2-11 (20 weeks)
It's a GIRL!!! EDD 3-6-12