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  #1  
September 3rd, 2006, 11:42 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 8
I know this forum is "Just4mommies", but this I am not. I think I was a very good daddy thought and I have been reading this forum for days trying to find answers, that obviously are unanswerable.

My Fiance Crystal and I became pregnant in April '06, It was a miracle as several doctors told her that in all likelihood she would be unable to become pregnant. Her pregnancy was deemed high risk from day 1 as she had been diagnosed with junivile diabetes at the age of 10, had lost most of her stomach function due to gasteroparesis bythe age of 18, and then lost her sight at the age of 21, as well as other medical problems the diabetes had caused.

At 24 and after 3 false calls ahe received a phone call for er long awaited pancreaus. They were ready to do a pancreaus transplant and it took well, that was on 9-11-04. Since the trance plant things have gone pretty good as she is on a certain regimen of drugs and she had 2 more eye surgeries that allowed her to regain "some" of her sight back, she still will never read or drive a vehicle, but I do those things for her.

After becoming pregnant we had seen the high risk OB at least weekly, and also seen ultrasounds weekly, Out of the 6 months we were pregnant she was hospitalized 5 of those months for monitoring, every day got better, ever day "Hunter" got stronger. Chris was so sick with the constant vomiting and the fluxuating blood pressures, it was so hard to jugle the health of Hunter versus her health as her pancreas went into rejection and needed intervention....

So here I am, and here she site beside me as I read these forums to her, We buried our beloved Hunter just 2 days ago. It was a beautifle service, It actually took us to FIGHT for a funeral home to actually have a service, most wanted a quick graveside ceremony at a low cost. We wanted a memory, we wanted to say goodbye in the proper way with all of our loved ones present.


I will only excerpt this story here, please visit my site to read more.....

Hunter Charles was born on 8-25-06 at 11:15am, a few days shy of 24 weeks with underdeveloped lungs and no life left in him. For 23 weeks and 4 days he was a daily part of our lives, we saw him at least weekly. We watched as he grew, saw him do flips and turns, and hiccup more times than I could count and he was loved more than I ever have ever loved before. Hunter taught Crystal and I the true meaning of boundless love and now the meaning of sacrifice. He was born perfect with 10 little fingers and toes and a cute button nose. He will be loved and missed FOREVER.

Robb318.com - The baby Blog

Thank you for letting us share our story, as difficult as it is.
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  #2  
September 3rd, 2006, 12:11 PM
heathernoel's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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  #3  
September 3rd, 2006, 12:15 PM
Sugar+Spicex3's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2,010
Thank you for sharing Hunter with us. I know how hard it is to talk sometimes.

I am so sorry your precious little boy is no longer with you. I lost my Alexys 12 yrs ago on Hunter's birthday. While the pain and longing never goes away, it will get easier. Day by day. I'm sending you lots of hugs.

If you two ever need to talk, feel free to PM me.
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  #4  
September 3rd, 2006, 02:05 PM
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Tears, hugs and many prayers are coming your way today. I felt so bad when I checked this board to see a new screen name. It is always a tragedy when someone has to join us. I am so sorry for the loss of your little Hunter. I love that name and DH and I thought of that name for a boy if we had another one. You can take comfort in knowing your precious little angel baby is safe with our Lord Jesus Christ as he is taking such wonderful care of our little ones for us until we get there. I am glad you got to see Hunter on a weekly basis and that you got to have him in your lives if even for the short time you had him. I would never give up one second I had with my little Macy. It was all worth it just to carry her for the 17 weeks we had together.
I am happy for you that you got to have a service for her and have those memories to take with you.

There are many warm and loving people on this site to help you through these first few difficult months you have ahead of you. There is also a pregnancy loss board that is available to you as well. Many of the articles and websites and stories listed on here helped me during my first couple of months. It helps to know that you are not alone and that there are other people out there who are going through what you have been through.

The pain will always be there but the future will get easier and the days won't seem so long. Take comfort in each other and your family and friends now. Take them up on offers to help. Don't try to do this all on your own.

God bless you both.
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  #5  
September 4th, 2006, 04:10 AM
Ben,Logan&Kaitlin'sMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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First off thank you to both of your for sharing your story with us - the stillbirth forum is for both mom's and dad's - we often forget how much dad's are hurt as well as us mom's that carried our children.

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious son - I can't believe you have the strength to write and even to hear what we write after it only being two days so big hugs and prayers going out to both of you.

Please continue to read our forums to crystal and please do write - we will try to help as best we can.

Unfortunally the path that our children took is unanswerable, there is no easy answer nor is there any easy solution. our children lived in our hearts and will forever stay there.

to both of you
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  #6  
September 5th, 2006, 11:14 AM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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Location: Littleton, CO
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I'm in tears as I'm sitting here, desperately trying to come up with something to say that will take away the hurt even though I KNOW there is nothing that can be said.

I'm amazed you had the strength to come here after two days. Two days after I lost my Cora I was still in shock.

It's been four months and 3 days for me. Four months and four days since I found out her little heart had stopped (I was induced the morning after confirming there was no heartbeat). There are days when I still miss her so desperately I can't do anything but cry. However, there are more good days in between.


Please know that you are never alone. Any time you need to have someone who understands, or someone that will cry with you, we are here. It has helped me to no end to be able to come here and cry and not have people act as if I should be "over it" by now.

It never leaves you. Your Hunter will never leave you.

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  #7  
September 16th, 2006, 06:13 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 50
I am very glad you posted also. My husband and I also lost our son on Sept. 6th, so our grieving is still very fresh. We buried Braeden on Sept. 9th and it was a very nice service.

I am sorry to hear about your loss and I will keep you and your wife in my prayers. If you ever want to talk I am here for that. It helps me to talk about him too, b/c I don't want him to be forgotten. He was still very much alive when I gave birth to him and his little heart beat for almost an hour. There were no cries but I knew when he passed.

Braeden had Potters syndrome, where no kidneys develop and they said that I could keep him to term but he would not survive out of my womb and I was more or less life support for him.

Just know that God is looking after you and your wife right now and I hope the best for both of you.
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  #8  
September 17th, 2006, 07:08 AM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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Maree:
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  #9  
September 18th, 2006, 04:41 AM
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I am so sorry for all you have had to go through. I wish you both peace. Many Hugs to you both.
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  #10  
October 8th, 2006, 10:26 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 8
Quote:
I am so sorry for all you have had to go through. I wish you both peace. Many Hugs to you both.[/b]

Hey Everybody !!

Chris and I are doing a bit better, She is still in and out of the hospital alot, but things SEEM to be going a bit better lately.

We went and ordered Huntes monument just last week 20" wide 18" high is the biggest we can put in the "baby Land" section of the cemetary where he is, se we ordered that one.

The stone is rare, so It may take a few months to come in, but they will lay the footing before winter, so thats cool. Also it gives Crystal and I time to get married so out names will be the same on the monument.

We are thinking of bringing pictures of our Kitties to be sketched on the monument, like playing with a ball of yarn or something.... Something cute and fun.....

I still update the Blog (that section) from time to time.... Today was suppose to be the baby shower.... so Its a tough day but we made it through okay.... not great, but were okay.

Thanks to everyone for all the well wishes and prayers... -Robb318.
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  #11  
October 8th, 2006, 11:20 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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I'm so glad to hear from you! I was just thinking about you two the other day...I had completely forgotten about your blog though...lol.


I'm glad you have Hunter's monument chosen. That's something I didn't have to worry about, as we had our daughter's body cremated, and spread her ashes on Jenny Lake in Grand Teton National Park. Since it's a national park, they won't let us put up any sort of marker or anything. *sigh* We have lots of pictures of the lake, and the little urn is full of rocks from the bottom of the lake. So we have part of the lake with us always.


I'm glad things are "seeming" to go better at least. It makes things easier.

to you both! As time goes by the good days get more numerous and get closer together. Don't get me wrong, I still miss my baby girl terribly, and always will, but I find I can smile and laugh now, without always feeling like I shouldn't because I miss her. I truly believe that our smiles and laughter are what our angels want to see and hear most.

Hunter is watching you, and I know he misses you as much as you miss him, and is grateful for the time he got to spend with you, and be loved by you, however short it was.
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  #12  
October 26th, 2006, 08:00 AM
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Hey you guys...

Yesterday was 2 months since Hunter passed. The marker is not in place yet as the rock quory is having difficulties finding the spefic kind of stone we requested. They are however going to lay the footing before the ground freezes in the winter.

We went to "see" him yesterday and I made a kind of make shift marker temporarily.... Just so theres "something" cute there.... Things are progressing day by day....

We are going ov vacation to vegas in 2hours just to get away.... If only we could get away from ourselves...

This is in the cemetary.... Just for now, Until we get our monument...




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  #13  
December 14th, 2006, 11:39 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 8
Hunter Charles,

We lost our baby almost 4 months ago. Crystal still cries ALOT !!!
I cried today, I usually do it when she is sleeping, as to not upset her more.

The monument is in, we just have to sketch it out.

I Moved what I once called "the baby blog" to a new home
as it is no longer focused on our baby, but still houses his story
and the tramatic events.

PLEASE, check out the new blog.... And If applicable, support our forums. (there bran new)

http://apartment305.blogsome.com/
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  #14  
December 17th, 2006, 05:19 PM
heathernoel's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Maitland, Florida
Posts: 9,385
Please know that I think about the three of you often, and have been praying for healing for Chrystal. I know you are going through more than most people have to experience.
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  #15  
December 23rd, 2006, 04:25 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 308
I am so, so sorry for your loss. There really isnt anything anyone can say or do to stop or even ease the pain, this I know, but I really wish I could help you guys. I am so sorry about your wife, too. She has been through so much in her lifetime...no one should EVER have to endure.

I am not sure what to say...I am just really sorry and your story really broke my heart. You are in my thoughts. Keep your head up and please, please be strong. You guys have eachother...and you know something, shes sooo lucky to have a man like you in her life. You have stood by her thru it all and thats something so rare and beautiful. I wish you guys the best of luck in everything. Happy Holidays and remember, you are welcomed to write here any time you want!
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  #16  
February 19th, 2007, 07:41 AM
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Thank you for sharing your story. It's not often we hear the father's side. It's touching and sad. My thoughts and prayers are with you and Crystal.

Melissa
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  #17  
August 10th, 2007, 01:54 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 8
Hi -

We are coming up on 1 year -

Things are still hard and always will be, (I think)

I want to reach out to the lady that Photoshops the Angel pictures...
I would love to get Hunters done as the picture they took of him at
birth before he was washed and such is unflattering to say the least.\

Is that lady still doing that ?!?

It would mean so much to us....

I can be mailed at Robb318@gmail.com

or called at 841-810-0062

Thanks sooooo Much...!!!

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  #18  
August 10th, 2007, 08:24 AM
claire1979's Avatar mummy to a special angel
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hello robb

you are in my thoughts and prayers as the 1st angelversary approaches of your little angel....

i don't know which lady this is...but i have photo shop are you talking about a picture to frame or just the picture enhancing for your siggy hun? i can enhance your pictue and see if it looks better...(although im sure your angel is beautiful )

hugs to you x

love claire
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  #19  
August 18th, 2007, 07:13 PM
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Quote:
hello robb

you are in my thoughts and prayers as the 1st angelversary approaches of your little angel....

i don't know which lady this is...but i have photo shop are you talking about a picture to frame or just the picture enhancing for your siggy hun? i can enhance your pictue and see if it looks better...(although im sure your angel is beautiful )

hugs to you x

love claire[/b]
Claire -

Hi - I really would just love to get a picture that is enhanced a bit so our baby doesn't look so.... so.... "transparent"
I think they took the pic before they washed him and it just looks as if he has white lotion on him in certain spots..

If your a photoshop lady maybe you could make it look a bit more presentable ?!?

Its not even for a Siggy its just for Crystal and I to look at yearly or so...

Do you have an email addy to mail it to you - or can you email me ??

Thanks,,,

Robb.
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