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I know how you feel. In between my dancing on cloud nine moments are my worry-wort moments. I was so excited for my first u/s on 9/17, but then I battle with nerves and thinking "oh please let there be a strong heartbeat."
I think regardless of whether you have had a m/c previously or not, once you are pregnant, you go into protective mom mode, worrying about the best for your baby. I just try to listen to my friends who insist I stay positive and think positive.
I'm very sorry your doctor has put you in this position of worry.
I feel you! I'm also worried about it but I'm trying to push it from my mind. I have been testing with dollar store tests and praying they get darker...so far test line isn't as dark as control which makes me kind of nervous. I guess I will find out for sure what's going on on the 12th...unless I start bleeding before ( sounds awfully pessimistic )
You'll be fine. I'd say that you'll beat the odds, but there are no odds to beat - the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor. Every day, healthy babies are born. Significantly more babies are born healthy than are lost.
It's okay to face the fear. If you try to always push it away, it will stick around more. So every so often, let yourself fear it. Let yourself worry about your baby - you're going to worry for its whole life - that's what moms do!
I battle with myself every day! I stay up and night worrying about everything. I need to relax and realize how special this time is, and try not to count down every second til second trimester! You are definitely not alone!
__________________ Sheila, loving wife to Patrick and mom to Xavier (9), Gabriel (7), Michaela (4) and Dominic (2). baby #5 05/16/13