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Not happy with my midwife. :/


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  #1  
October 17th, 2013, 04:24 PM
Masesmama's Avatar Veteran
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So I chose to see a midwife here in the small town I live in. There's only one midwife and 4 ob's. The ob's all have horrible reviews. I'm looking for a more natural experience than I had with my son.

I have been to two appointments and haven't met the midwife yet. They told me I needed to call today and schedule an appointment at the lab to get bloodwork, HIV test, urine test and a glucose test done. A glucose test at 11-12 weeks?! They wouldn't explain to me what the bloodwork is but said it's just routine. I don't really feel comfortable with doing it. I don't think a glucose test is necessary this early in pregnancy and I'm still sick, there's no way I can fast all morning and then go in and so the test without being sick. I don't feel like drinking that junk drink that is all highly processed sugar, no way it can be good for you.

Then they told me at my next appointment I will be given a flu shot. No choice. I'm not feeling like this is the natural midwife experience I was looking for. My only other option is to switch to a birth center that is 75 miles away. I don't mind the drive, it's a little inconvenient since my son has preschool but I won't be delivering in this area anyway since we will move around 25 weeks. What would you do?
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  #2  
October 17th, 2013, 04:33 PM
Tree_Love's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Go to the other place. Your current office sounds like they are not doing things based on medical knowledge, just outdated norms. Especially if you are moving, don't waste your time at the crappy place. Anf I would be a total crazy lady and write them a letter explaining how awful they are and why they are wrong and that's why I left... But you know, that's me... Haha.
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  #3  
October 17th, 2013, 04:45 PM
Masesmama's Avatar Veteran
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Hahaha. I do feel like it's really outdated and my whole reason for choosing a midwife was to have some choice and control over what I would do in my prenatal care. I think glucose tests are useless because an A1c panel can be done without even drinking that nasty horrible drink.. Not to mention ob offices don't even use the same standArds for testing glucose so you could be diabetic by one doctors standard and not by another. I want to know what bloodwork I am having done before agreeing to it and they told me if I didn't get it all done they wouldn't see me. I don't like being told what to do lol.
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  #4  
October 17th, 2013, 04:56 PM
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Find one in the area your moving too. Good luck
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  #5  
October 17th, 2013, 05:03 PM
Andrea1122's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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It's completely normal to do a early gluecose test if you had GD in your last pregnancy, but otherwise there is NO point. I have to do mine next week, but I have had GD 2times. Your blood sugars need to be much more controlled durning pregnancy and a AIC tests your overall blood sugar not your daily levels...
Sorry your not getting the care you were looking for. Hope you figure out something that's feels good too you.
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  #6  
October 17th, 2013, 06:30 PM
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Yeah I wouldn't go for not seeing the midwife at every appt at all. It is pretty standard to run a few blood tests at this point in the pregnancy (mostly STDs) but I have never heard of anyone doing a glucose test this early unless there were known issues. And I would majorly balk at any test not explained to me personally by the dr/midwife (but maybe that is just me). My OB talks me through any tests needed/suggested thoroughly ahead of time so I can make an informed decision with no pressure.

Is the birth center near where you will be moving too? If so it might make sense to go ahead and get set up there and make the drive once a month for a while. Especially if you can get a better experience there.
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  #7  
October 17th, 2013, 07:50 PM
Masesmama's Avatar Veteran
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I will be moving to either California, Hawaii or North Carolina. lol we have no idea yet, my husband is waiting on orders from the Marine Corps. It's driving me crazy not to know because I want to know what kind of care I'll be able to get there too.

In regards to the glucose testing, I have never had high blood sugar and was not GD with my first pregnancy. I didn't have any complications so I don't see why they want me to do it now, and again in the end of the second trimester. A midwife is supposed to be all about the least invasive and the least unnecessary procedures so it's not really turning me on to using their office. And the fact I still haven't met the midwife. They also told me at the last appointment that my next appointment on Oct 30th would be with the OB for a pap smear.. so that's putting me at around 18 weeks before I even have my first appointment with the midwife!
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  #8  
October 17th, 2013, 08:18 PM
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Why in the world do you have no say in getting the flu shot... They would have to drag me kicking and screaming ...and probably crying to get one! There is just no way.
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  #9  
October 17th, 2013, 09:34 PM
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You can deny any testing or procedure. You can also ask them for a list of blood tests they will perform and they have to give it to you. Dr offices like that seem shady to me and should be more than happy to answer any questions or concerns you have.
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  #10  
October 18th, 2013, 02:36 AM
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I wouldn't trust them, it doesn't sound right at all. Definitely find someone else who can give you better care, even if it's only temporary until your move.
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  #11  
October 18th, 2013, 03:40 AM
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If the midwife is unavailable to speak to you regarding your decisions to refuse a flu shot or anything else you might want to choose in your care then I would check out the birth center. I hope it all works out!
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  #12  
October 18th, 2013, 04:25 AM
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I would definitely seek out other options. Something to get you through until the move. I have a regular, run-of-the-mill OBGN and when I told them there was no way I was geting a flu shot they told me that was fine and my choice. No guilt trip or anything.

I would be so frustrated!! Hugs and hope you find something you are happier with very soon!
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  #13  
October 18th, 2013, 04:58 AM
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Ugh, I'd be very upset too! They cannot force these things on you but, they can choose to not continue on with you as a patient. I would seriously be looking around, even if it meant I had to drive to another town and deliver elsewhere. They NEED to tell you what these things are, they cannot try and pass it off as routine, it's your body, your baby, your choice!

However, I was told they want me to do the glucose test early because of my weight. I knew it was coming, whatever. I'm fat, yup. Not as fat as my heaviest, but I'm still considered fat.
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  #14  
October 18th, 2013, 05:15 AM
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I would definitely run away from someone who said I had "no say" in getting the flu vaccine! Since you are moving anyway, and you would only have to go every 4 weeks I think I would try to switch. It is a bit of a drive, but I wouldn't let anyone force me to do things I didn't want to do.
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  #15  
October 18th, 2013, 09:32 AM
Masesmama's Avatar Veteran
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I'm glad I'm not just crazy lol. I really want this to be a good experience with this pregnancy like I did not have with my first child. I don't like when the nurse just assumes that I'm going to go along with everything I say without giving me any say in it or even information. It doesn't feel right to me and I don't think it's a good fit. Maybe all of those things are okay for some people and that's fine but it's not for me.

I'm going to call my insurance today and see if they will switch me to a midwife at the birth center. I hate that with military insurance I need a referral to be switched but hopefully that will be quick and painless too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by inyourhonor View Post
Ugh, I'd be very upset too! They cannot force these things on you but, they can choose to not continue on with you as a patient. I would seriously be looking around, even if it meant I had to drive to another town and deliver elsewhere. They NEED to tell you what these things are, they cannot try and pass it off as routine, it's your body, your baby, your choice!

However, I was told they want me to do the glucose test early because of my weight. I knew it was coming, whatever. I'm fat, yup. Not as fat as my heaviest, but I'm still considered fat.


I am also a little overweight, but not by a whole lot. Not in the obese category. I know they request the test early for some overweight moms.. I have no family history of GD or diabetes at all and didn't have it with my first pregnancy so I really didn't like them requesting to do it this early in pregnancy, especially when they are going to do it again in 14 weeks or so. I don't mind doing it then if I have to, but not twice, given I have no real risk factors for it.
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  #16  
October 18th, 2013, 10:25 AM
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If it were me, I would just say no. you will only be at your current city for another 3 months. that's 3 appointments....and if you're like me only 2 appointments. I'd save my money on gas and time. just go to the midwife you're at currently and refuse the stuff you don't want to do. They can't make you do anything. Tell them you will take the Glucose test at such in such time & you do not want a flu shot. If the midwife says she wont see you if you refuse then go to the place 75 miles away. If you do decide to get the flu shot make sure its thermosal free (the kid one in a pink syringe) it's the safer one.

I am with an OB, I refuse the glucose test, flu shots, while in hospital iv's, full time monitoring, staying in bed, not eating, etc. he just says "well i recommend it but it is your ultamite decision."
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  #17  
October 18th, 2013, 10:56 AM
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While I personally believe that the GTT is important because an a1c won't necessarily catch GD early, there is no reason to have it done this early if you haven't had GD before. Having type I diabetes I get to skip that test

Just remember, you can refuse any and all medical procedures, it is your right. Don't let them bully or scare you into doing anything you don't want to! I believe we have to be our own advocates and do research ourselves because often doctors make decisions on old information or out of fear of getting sued. I have learned this over the years from dealing with a lot of ****** health care professionals.

Hope you're able to find a medical professional that you trust and will let you have control.
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  #18  
October 18th, 2013, 11:10 AM
anjewellove's Avatar Super Mommy
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oh and I still get checked for GD just not with the glucose sugary drink test, I get a blodd test instead.
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