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Mini rant - cuz I need to vent it somewhere

Forum: May 2014 Playroom


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  • 1 Post By jmills1129

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November 4th, 2013, 07:13 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: North Texas
Posts: 705
My mother has a lot of medical problems. Her immune system attacks her body in so many ways they don't have a name for it. Well, her hip gave out 2 weeks ago. She didn't tell me until I got back from my honeymoon in Vegas. She needs hip replacement. Well, it's very very dangerous for her to undergo surgery. Last year she had a treatment to wipe out her immune system in the hopes to give her body some time to heal. Invasive surgery, no immune system....very dangerous.

So she told me about needing surgery yesterday. She's talking about being able to be up and "running" by March so she's ready for whenever our baby comes. We were both talking very positively about the things she will be able to do. But then she tells me we need to go baby shopping together before the surgery so she can buy my baby gift. Talking like that, it's like she needs to get this out of the way before surgery in case.....things go badly.

I hate the idea of her not being there for my first baby coming into the world. I don't know how I could survive being pregnant and losing my mom. I almost want to ask her to wait until after I deliver so that I don't risk losing the baby from grief. I mean, I know that's not easy to do, but how would my baby survive my heartbreak?

Mom had a bad pain day today. I called her tonight to see if she could hear my doppler over the phone. When she got on the phone, I heard the pain and tears in her voice. But after hearing not only the heartbeat but also all of baby's movements (thumps), her voice was pure joy. She said she needed that. She wants me to bring the doppler to the hospital after her surgery (not yet scheduled yet, but she's hoping in the next 4-6 weeks). She wants to be able to hear her grandchild. She's almost more excited about it than I am lol. If that's even possible.

I know stress is no good for me and the baby, so I thought if I let it out here, I could stop thinking about it. It's hard enough for me with just being pregnant. I feel so weird and sometimes down because I am NOT enjoying this like I hoped I would. I get so tired of being tired. I hope it gets better, but I don't want to get my hopes up. I guess the one good thing about being pregnant is pregnancy brain. Maybe I can forget about the surgery.

Lucas Xavier is here! Born 4/24/2014 at 10:47pm
7 pounds 6 ounces
20.5 inches long

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November 4th, 2013, 07:25 PM
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 269
I'm so sorry for what you are going through. Sadly, I can actually relate to you. My father finds out tomorrow if he has melanoma and I have been an emotional wreck since I found out. It's so scary to think about losing your parents. I will be praying for you and your mother!!
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November 4th, 2013, 07:57 PM
jmills1129's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 1,385
Thoughts and prayers for you both. What a scary thing.
NurseMommy19 likes this.

9w4d, June, 16 2013
Missing My Angel baby
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November 5th, 2013, 03:33 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,387
I'm so sorry I totally get where you are coming from...my mom passed away 5 years ago and I especially missed her while I was pregnant and now since I'm a mom because there are so many things that I wish I could have talked to her about. Of course I'm also sad that my kids will never meet her. I'm sorry your family is going through this; it's so hard to have a sick mom. I hope that she gets better and everything turns out ok ((hugs))

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November 5th, 2013, 07:15 AM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 17,592
I'm so sorry She will be in my thoughts. I will hope for the best out come!

My step-dad (who's basically my dad) has had his prostate cancer return, but it went to his bones. I haven't said anything but I'm afraid he won't be here for the baby. My boys love him so much, I want this baby to have that same bond. He's doing okay now, but with it being in his bones, it's very scary.

Killian Rivers born April 17th at 36 weeks

Killian's Birth Story
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