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  #1  
August 31st, 2013, 06:50 PM
LUSHaye's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Colorado
Posts: 966
When is a general time to tell?

I'm probably going to have to let my work know before everyone else since I had a loss earlier this year and they'll need to be aware if anything comes up.
But I told SO I didn't want to make the announcement until the 1st trimester was over, which is around the beginning of November. If I really wanted, I could just wait until Thanksgiving, but...I'm thinking that may not be so good.
My sister knows because she lives with me and she's a huge source of support. SO is probably going to tell his best friend. But I'm hoping it doesn't slip out too much before I'm ready to let them all know.

Anyone else's thoughts on timing?
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  #2  
August 31st, 2013, 06:56 PM
*CAMM*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: somewhere over the rainbow
Posts: 8,635
Our immediate family members already know but we are waiting until 12 weeks for the rest of the world.

We are making our announcement while we are at Disney World =) We are planning a fun picture with Disney characters.
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  #3  
August 31st, 2013, 07:01 PM
Lyndsey2013's Avatar Mom to 2 + 3
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 848
A lot of people like to wait until 12 weeks, so they have a significantly lower chance of miscarriage. SO and I are planning to wait until Christmas, only because we had our last baby in January and don't want to deal with people saying it's too soon. Also this will be baby #5 for us (#2 for me, #5 for our blended family), and I'm worried what people will say.
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  #4  
August 31st, 2013, 08:02 PM
bella88's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,052
I am getting to be more and more of the mind that it isn't going to hurt any less if I keep it a secret and we lose this baby. I may as well enjoy every step of this pregnancy and if I feel like telling people then that is ok . I have to tell work because there are things that I'm not supposed to do and some family and close friends know already. I'm not going to keep it a secret and deny it but I am not going to be making fb announcements or anything like that either. I plan on not putting it on fb as an announcement at all actually. I figure if they are friends that know me then they will find out at some point by seeing me in person if they don't know already.
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Last edited by bella88; August 31st, 2013 at 08:07 PM.
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  #5  
August 31st, 2013, 08:20 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: SW Ohio
Posts: 360
I think we may tell after my first appointment. It'll be soon and I'm taking a chance, but since I tend to get very sick (at least I did with my last), it's difficult to hide. Also I can't keep a secret until November!
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  #6  
August 31st, 2013, 09:47 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: North Texas
Posts: 705
Everyone in our everyday lives basically already knows. I can't keep this monumental thing to myself. We are waiting to tell extended family and friends on Facebook until end of trimester 1. I think we are also waiting to tell his parents until Thanksgiving-ish. DH's parents are very traditional Thai. I'd be afraid of them thinking something is wrong with me if I miscarry.
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  #7  
August 31st, 2013, 10:23 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 119
I told my family already and most of my friends. My SO is waiting until I am into the second trimester to tell anyone. He has to tell his daughter and ex wife and we don't want to tell his 9 year old daughter too early and something happen and have to explain it. So Oct 22 is our grand reveal date for everyone that doesn't not know already
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  #8  
September 1st, 2013, 07:51 AM
ToMuchElmo's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York State
Posts: 336
My close friends know. I'm in a different situation, not planning on telling family until well into the 2nd trimester.
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  #9  
September 1st, 2013, 08:00 AM
Masesmama's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Arizona, USA
Posts: 439
I haven't told a soul yet.. of course only got BFP yesterday lol. DH is in a very stressful course at work so I'm waiting until after his finals so he doesn't have that on his mind in addition to his course already. Next week is his last week I'm pretty sure.. or the week after lol. It's going to be IMPOSSIBLE to keep quiet but I want him to be happy and not stressed. I reallllllly want to tell my sister but she is moving close to where I live in a couple days so I'm going to wait to tell anyone until after I tell DH. We will probably announce to our family by tagging them on facebook, which I plan to wait until close to the end of first trimester... Maybe I'll use halloween as a clever announcement.
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  #10  
September 1st, 2013, 08:27 AM
Sheila
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 596
With all of our last babies we had waited until at least 10- 12 weeks, because I was afraid of miscarriage. However, this last May when I started having problems at 6 1/2 weeks, I ended up having to tell everyone, and explain that it wasn't good news and that I was or did have a miscarriage. I think this time it would be much easier to tell everyone under happy circumstances at first, and then if something goes wrong I don't have to give the good news with the bad.
My DH really likes to wait. I think he tries to wait until he has come to grips with reality (HAHA) but I don't think that really hits for him until delivery.
I really want to tell people who will be genuinely happy for us... a few close friends and family and our kids. My inlaws are going to find out from my hubby on the phone. They won't be happy and I am sure will have some snide comments. Therefore, I don't want to be anywhere near them when they find out. There is nothing worse than sharing this amazing news and being met with negativity!!
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  #11  
September 1st, 2013, 10:07 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 368
We haven't told anyone at this point, I don't plan to tell until after ultrasound. It sounds strange, but i feel like i have been trying to "forget" that I am pregnant and telling people will make it a little too real . Everyone close knows about our losses and i know they would be supportive of us and this pregnancy, but I am just scared on the whole I think.
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  #12  
September 1st, 2013, 10:34 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: England
Posts: 17,599
I told my best friend (who is also my SIL) but we werent going to tell anyone else for a few weeks, DH told his dad (who then told his partner!) So not sure how long it will be secret. We have a big group of friends at church, and there are certain people i want to tell personally (this will effect various ministries we help in) so need to get those done first.
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  #13  
September 1st, 2013, 04:20 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: West Virginia
Posts: 49
I can't stand to keep the news to myself. We found out the day before my kids' photo's were done, so I made a frame with the announcement and asked the photographer to snap a shot so we could announce it to our friends on facebook. This was the shot:
I came up with the saying because the internet didn't have anything cute to announce after 2, lol. It says "Mommy and Daddy were just so surprised when the test turned pink and our family turned to five"
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  #14  
September 2nd, 2013, 06:16 AM
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Posts: 19
My sister (who is due 4-1-14!) knows as well as a couple close friends. We will tell family after our ultrasound (around 6-7 weeks) and the everyone else after that, maybe at 8 weeks or so. We also told our baby but he doesn't understand since he's only one
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  #15  
September 2nd, 2013, 08:28 AM
acmd03's Avatar Lincoln's Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 476
I can't stand keeping this to myself I love being pregnant and love when everyone knows about it, so we tell early. With our son we told our parents right away, and it accidentally leaked out, so we announced on fb probably not even a week after the first bfp. Definitely a bit earlier than I wanted, but not by much!

This time, we told our parents right away again, and our siblings. We've also told a few close friends. But I'll probably put an announcement up on fb at the end of this week, since I'll be 6 weeks then. For my peace of mind, I don't even let a miscarriage be something I consider a possibility, so I'm ignoring the chances of it happening and telling everyone whenever we feel like it!
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  #16  
September 2nd, 2013, 10:29 AM
Masesmama's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Arizona, USA
Posts: 439
I ended up telling my sister and my 2 close friends yesterday... Then I told my husband this morning lol. I wanted to wait and tell him after his class was over but I couldn't. He wanted me to go to the doctor TODAY for a blood test. They aren't open today lol.
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  #17  
September 2nd, 2013, 10:47 AM
Sassafrass's Avatar Running Mamma
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 4,141
Ive told online "friends", and dh. Nobody else. We had a 10 week loss in June and we want to wait until the first tri is over to tell anyone. Maybe even longer.
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  #18  
September 2nd, 2013, 11:55 AM
*CAMM*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: somewhere over the rainbow
Posts: 8,635
Since this is our last pregnancy we just wanted to do something fun and exciting to announce. In the past we have told earlier but never in a fun way. Only 7 more weeks and then then everyone will know =)

We have told earlier in the past which I dont know why we did...we had a loss at 12 weeks and it was so hard to tell people the baby was gone when they would ask about morning sickness ect.
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  #19  
September 2nd, 2013, 02:41 PM
mommy2b43's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,314
Quote:
Originally Posted by xagamama View Post
I really want to tell people who will be genuinely happy for us... a few close friends and family and our kids. My inlaws are going to find out from my hubby on the phone. They won't be happy and I am sure will have some snide comments. Therefore, I don't want to be anywhere near them when they find out. There is nothing worse than sharing this amazing news and being met with negativity!!
Are you by any chance catholic? Your children's names seem catholic to me and I always wonder when people have 5+ I am btw so just curious. It really ticks me off when people make negative comments about other people having however many children they want to have! First of all, at the point in which you tell someone you're pregnant, the baby is already there so your nasty opinion isn't going to change anything. Second, I'm pretty sure it would be socially unacceptable of me to walk up to someone older who decided not to have kids and say "um why didn't you have kids? That was awfully selfish of you." (Which is how I feel but would never say something even if I knew it was by choice and not circumstance!) I have a feeling I'm going to start getting it soon even though this is only #3 which I actually feel like is a rather small family for my age (30).

Okay, rant over I have told my parents and three of my closest friends. My older dd who is 5, told my sister's family this weekend when she was visiting with my parents. I just don't feel like telling anyone yet because mostly I'm just sick and while I'm over the moon to be having another baby- I really hate being pregnant so I think I'll just keep it to myself a little longer!
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  #20  
September 2nd, 2013, 08:26 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 4,767
We will tell our parents and very close friends once we see an h/b on the u/s. Everybody else will find out at 12 weeks - I'm trying to come up with some cute way to incorporate a Halloween theme into the announcement.
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