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Liliana Vale *the illustrated director's cut!*


Walk the Plank

The Birth Stories of our Pirates and Pixies

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  #1  
September 26th, 2013, 01:01 AM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freaking Louisiana
Posts: 7,778
Warning: there is one semi-graphic picture in here. Look at it! Loooook aaaat iiiiit!

Compared with my last, this birth seems a little boring to me, but here it is anyway!


I was scheduled to be induced on the night of September 24th. I had been contracting since the 23rd, irregularly every 5-15 minutes. I got a call the afternoon of the 24th, and a nurse told me they needed to push back the induction till the 25th. There were no bed available due to the sheer number of births happening that day.

My response was, "I hope you find one soon, mam, because I am already in labor." I got a call about 5 minutes later saying they found one. lol

I got to the hospital that evening, contractions even closer. Sometimes every 3, sometimes 5, sometimes later. I had to stop walking several times to wait them out. I got to the room, they hooked me up, and I wasn't surprised to see them on the monitor. They slowed down when I got in bed. The nurses said I wasn't in labor, and I pointed at the monitor. They still said I wasn't in labor, but I recognize those little hills! The OB later said those monitors don't do a great job picking things up, really. Why use them then? Seriously, they suck to wear!

They went ahead with the induction which was to be three pills on my cervix followed by pitocin. One pill, on an undilated cervix, dilated me to a four in about three hours. Contractions were 2-3 minutes apart by then. I was going to get to skip the rest! Woot woot!

I asked for some IV meds because I hate pain, you know, like most people. I am not sure why I didn't ask for the epidural then. I was pretty out of it the entire time I was in labor. I don't remember a lot of it. They gave me some Demerol and Phenergan since I also hate how Demerol makes me vomit.

They came and checked me a little later, said I was a 7-8. Demerol had worn off, but Phenergan had me loopy still. I remember thinking, "Oh, 8! That's the perfect time for an epidural! 7 is a little early and 9 would just be too late." So they maxed my fluids so I could get it ASAP. The anesthesiologist came in, I asked if he was my an-uhs-theesey-ologist.

"I am your anaesthetist."

"Not tonight, Dude. That one sounds hard to say. You are my anesthesiologist."

So he gets about stabbing my back with his nails and needles. I am so swollen, though. I knew it would be an ordeal. Took three tries to get my IV already. They even started with my good inner elbow veins. First thing they did was blow them. lol So I wasn't too surprised when he said he would be trying a second time. He was very good, explained step by step. Best part, he wasn't channeling the homicidal maniac doctor neighbor from "The Burbs" like the last one.

He looked and acted like this guy.



The Burbs is a Tom Hanks and Carrie Fisher movie. You should definitely see it once.
Anyway, back to the story...



This time the meds in the epi made me feel cozy and warm. Last time I was freezing! It worked on my uterus, it worked on my legs, and completely skipped my privates. Not surprised in the least! But again, better than last time. That one ONLY got my legs.

Just a little over an hour later my OB came in, checked me, and I guess saw fit to break waters. She said she wasn't convinced it helped labor, but maybe at 8 cm it did? Dunno. Not an hour after that, I feel a big contraction, and I feel something coming. Buzz the nurse.

"I think she's about to come out!" So they come and check right after a contraction, told me it would be a little bit. Nurses leave. One minute later, repeat. Page the nurse. "She really is coming out!" They tell me they are on their way. I page them three times telling them she is crowning. The last time I page them, they still haven't come back, but again ask how they can help me. This time I couldn't talk. My answer was, "Aaaaaauuuugggghhhhh!"

The pediatric nurse was already in there setting up, completely ignoring the moaning, screaming woman. A couple more come in, and they casually, CASUALLY, start to get some things together. Meanwhile, my uterus is doing all the pushing for me, and Lily's head is definitely coming out. Nurses still don't believe me. Between screams, I'm telling DH, "Honey, these d@mn labor beads aren't working! They aren't working!" I was squeezing them, looking at them, pressing them to my forehead, and putting them in my mouth. "I can't hold them anymore, honey. Take them. Take the beads! James, beads! Beads!" And then they were chunked across the room at his head. The nurses are laughing, the b!tches.

One finally walks over, puts her hand down there, does a yell-whisper to get the OB, and tells me, "Don't worry, I got it!" Her hand was cupping Lily's head which was was already halfway out. I dimly recall her putting some pressure on my perineum. She tells James, "When the doctor gets here, you'll have a baby." I'm laying there yelling because of "the ring of fire." By and by, my nurses had never heard it called that. I picked a winning shift for my delivery. That nurse catches the head, and the OB runs in just in time to catch the rest of her body.

I didn't push for her head at all, and I gave this little push for her body. It slithers out followed directly by the placenta. Quickest delivery for both baby and placenta out of all of mine. Her body hurt. I expect the head to hurt but not the body. Again, yay, swelling for making everything hurt!



They started to put her on my chest, and the OB commented I wanted her cleaned first which I did tell her. I don't like nasty, and I know that stuff is natural, but it's nasty! I told the nurse to wait because I was so so curious what she looked like. I remember a pair of blue gloves that sat her upright on my chest and held onto my new little slime ball, and I put my hands around baby's chest and back to make sure she didn't fall. "Aww, look honey! This one doesn't look like a spud!" Cause DD2 looked like an old potato.

I asked my doctor if I tore. Nope! "But there is a tiny little cut. Here, I'll put pressure on it." And I felt one or two fingers pressing down on the leftish of my hoohoo. "It'll sting for a few days when you pee, but it doesn't even warrant a stitch."



They took her off for her tests and vaccines, and I start listening to the OB and nurse. There was a knot in her cord. I asked if I could feel it, the cord in general, before they tossed it, and the doc held it up for me. Feels neat, totally ask to feel that thing, ladies! I chose that first pic of her so y'all could see it, the knot I mean. I know, I know... I shouldn't have, but I did anyway!

And I finally got her. Got to nurse for a little while. DH asked me to convey in expression how happy I was that this would never ever happen again:








Liliana (Lily) Vale
September 25, 2013
7:54 AM
8 lbs 9 oz
14" head
20.5" long





(They told us she was 21", wrote down that she was 20", and we decided to just go with 20.5". Also told us originally that the time of birth was 7:45. Written is 7:54. Goodness, they are a mess. I'm surprised we got out alive.)

This is one of our first nursing sessions the first day in our recovery room. Oh, and all the tub rooms got taken! F******* shower in my room! I chose the path of pain and misery for a tub, and I deserved my tub! Just fails all around for our hospital!



My swelling is going down pretty fast, and my body feels like it was in a car wreck. Just sore everywhere. My pelvis feels broken, and I have all this pain just everywhere. I still waddle! lol My skin is sensitive to the touch. Wherever there is or was swelling. I've had a lot of clotting, but knock on wood, my bleeding is at spotting just 3-4 days later.


That's all! Hope you enjoyed!
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Last edited by Spyctre; October 20th, 2014 at 08:27 PM. Reason: revised, expanded, and illustrated
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  #2  
September 26th, 2013, 03:06 AM
Julie
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Great story, congrats again
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  #3  
September 26th, 2013, 03:52 AM
jennyrae03's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spyctre View Post
I remembered my labor beads, and halfway through crowning I threw them across the room because they did not work. They did nothing to distract me!
LOL!!! This made me laugh

What a great birth story - thank you for sharing it!

I can't believe that they didn't take your word for it when you said she was coming out! That's pretty impressive that you just had to push once and out she came! We can all hope for such an easy delivery!
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  #4  
September 26th, 2013, 05:25 AM
1fabulousfem's Avatar Mommy to Finn + 1!
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Sounds like it went smoothly to me! LOL!
I hope you start to feel some normalcy soon and I cannot wait to see pics.
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  #5  
September 26th, 2013, 06:33 AM
fancypants27's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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LOL about the beads!!

Congrats on your baby girl. Can't wait to see some pics!!
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  #6  
September 26th, 2013, 06:36 AM
MrsPea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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The bead thing made me laugh too!

What's with nurses not believing women? I've read so many birth stories that include nurses not believing the woman was crowning!

Glad it all went pretty smoothly for you Arwen! Congratulations, can't wait to see pics. Rest up girl and enjoy your time away from home.
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  #7  
September 26th, 2013, 08:48 AM
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Congrats, can't wait to see pics. Wahoo for no tearing!!
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  #8  
September 26th, 2013, 12:31 PM
Leah
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Ha! She doesn't look like a spud. Sounds relatively smooth. I'd be so frustrated with those nurses! Can't wait to see pics. Rest up! Congratulations!
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  #9  
September 26th, 2013, 12:34 PM
jamieshalon2's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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How awesome that you only had to push once. I hope I get the same luck!

the whole bead thing is super funny. Love it!!

I can't wait to see the pics.
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  #10  
September 26th, 2013, 02:13 PM
Loni's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Congrats on your little girl!! I completely understand about the bead throwing, with my first I ended up throwing the oxygen mask across the room because it pissed me off.

Can't wait to see pics!
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  #11  
September 26th, 2013, 07:38 PM
ILoveStorm2011's Avatar Mack :)
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Yayyy congrats
Loved the bead thing! I'm worried I'll do the same with my tablet/phone
I can't wait to see pictures!
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  #12  
September 26th, 2013, 11:09 PM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
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Thanks, y'all! I was really drugged when I wrote this. I think I will expand on some stuff when I add pics.
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  #13  
September 27th, 2013, 02:33 PM
Wren's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I can't wait to see pictures of your non-spud daughter!
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  #14  
September 27th, 2013, 03:09 PM
FishermansWife4's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I can't wait to see pictures of your little Lily. I'm glad she was born happy and healthy. Those poor birth beads though... LOL I hope you enjoyed your bath and yay for no cutting or tearing!
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  #15  
September 27th, 2013, 03:18 PM
slmehaffey's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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sounds like a great birth! I bet the fact that you only had to push once contributed to your not tearing.. which I'm so happy you didn't, tearin and being sewn up is no fun as I'm sure you know.
Congrats! I can't wait to see those pictures!
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  #16  
September 27th, 2013, 10:13 PM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
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Amber, your bead is very strong I'll have you know. It survived being hurled at my husband. The nurses were laughing, but I was really upset those things did not work better!
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  #17  
September 28th, 2013, 06:19 AM
FishermansWife4's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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LOL AWESOME!! But poor hubby. I'd be upset too that they didn't work better. How are you and Lily doing today??
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  #18  
September 29th, 2013, 02:26 AM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
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We're as good as can be when my mom is "helping!" Well, she is helping some. I got to take a nice long bath, and she did some dishes. Lily is sleeping a bunch, eating a bunch. Eating a whole bunch. I think she's going to be fat one day. She eats a lot!

Updated my story now that I have a moment.
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  #19  
September 29th, 2013, 02:48 AM
jennyrae03's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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FYI, you are the best story teller EVER.

And I love your pictures - most especially the one of you lol
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  #20  
September 29th, 2013, 09:06 AM
FishermansWife4's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I love the pictures and what an awesome story. Lily is so gosh darn cute! I just want to cuddle her to pieces!
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