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Looking for advice for a family member who lost her daughter


Forum: Loss of a Child

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  #1  
July 5th, 2009, 02:51 PM
LisaB's Avatar Mom to twins + 1
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Carmel, CA
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I hope it's ok to post here... I posted about the loss of my niece a while back, since I was having a hard time coming to terms with it. My question for today is about her mom, my SIL. She is sinking deeper and deeper into depression. She recognizes it and is undergoing treatment, but I'm just wondering if there's anything I can do for her. She doesn't want visitors right now so that isn't an option. But next month I'm having a birthday party for my twins turning one, and I'll see my SIL there. Would it be ok for me to give her a small photo book with all the pictures of her daughter that I have in it? I would wait until the end of the party to give it to her.

Thank you, and my condolences to all on this board. I think there is nothing worse than losing a child. No parent should ever have to bury their child.
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Me: Lisa, Mommy to twins +1
8/5/08 Beautiful twin girls Leigh and Lucy born after 4-year struggle with RPL & 6 losses
12/10/09 Surprise! Baby #3 is on the way, EDD 6/22/10

12/29/09 2nd ultrasound - joining team blue

6/16/10 Baby Ben is born!


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  #2  
July 5th, 2009, 03:07 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Grand Rapids Michigan United States
Posts: 2,890
I went through major depression after losing Madison, but liked having company. I would have loved for someone to share pics of Madison with me. I would hand it to her when no one is around. I would just say that I wanted her to have them. She may or may not look at them when your their. I am sure she will value having them.
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  #3  
July 5th, 2009, 05:29 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Indiana
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Quote:
She may or may not look at them when your their. I am sure she will value having them.
I agree with this. she may not be up to looking at the photos right away but she will value them in time.
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  #4  
July 5th, 2009, 05:55 PM
Member
Join Date: May 2009
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I also agree. My SIL made me a CD with different photos of my daughter set to music. It is in a special place with her things, but I have yet to look at it and it is 9 months later for me. However, I love knowing that I have it and when I am ready I can watch it.

Yolonda
Angel D'Lon Grace Mommy
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  #5  
July 5th, 2009, 09:06 PM
Delekatala's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Rhode Island
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I would adore it if someone did that for me. It would show that not everyone is moving on and leaving her with her grief alone, and that people are thinking of her daughter. However I want to warn, I would also probably cry. It would be happy crying though. Because iot means so much to me. SO if she cries it is not a bad thing.
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  #6  
July 6th, 2009, 04:14 AM
LisaB's Avatar Mom to twins + 1
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Carmel, CA
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Thank you ladies, I feel much better about giving her the photos now. If I knew how to put them on a DVD with music I would. We all miss my niece, she was really something special. Thank you again.
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Me: Lisa, Mommy to twins +1
8/5/08 Beautiful twin girls Leigh and Lucy born after 4-year struggle with RPL & 6 losses
12/10/09 Surprise! Baby #3 is on the way, EDD 6/22/10

12/29/09 2nd ultrasound - joining team blue

6/16/10 Baby Ben is born!


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