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Hi, I'm new here. I lost my daughter Abigail 6 months ago yesterday. She was born on September 26, 2010 and died on September 30. We didn't have any warning that something fatal would be wrong with her. The Friday before I delivered the doctors told me worst case scenario she'd lose an ovary. She was born with a midgut volvulus so sever that all of her intestines had to be removed. We had to make the difficult decision to remove her from the ventilator, and we had 20 beautiful, tense, stressful, bittersweet hours with her before her perfect heart quit beating.
Last night my SO told me we need help, so here I am. I need help. How do I go on? How do I continue to live when the only thing I want is gone? Any advice is appreciated. Thanks.
First, I want to say I'm so sorry for your loss. My husband I lost our daughter 87 minutes after birth 2 years ago this April 9th.
It will get easier but there's no easy way to get to that point. There have been many times where I just had to take it one day at a time...and occasionally one hour or minute at a time. You breath in, you breath out, you talk about your daughter as much or as little as you want, and it's okay to cry (I still do!). If no one wants to listen to you it's okay to find a counselor or therapist. I found a support group online for my daughter's condition and found that very helpful.
I am so sorry for your loss. I have no idea how we go on, except that we have no choice. I find meaning in keeping my daughters memory alive, otherwise she would be forgotten. And I also found blogging about my grief helpful. It is different for everyone.