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I didn't get ANY pics or video of my homebirth (DH just "didn't think of it" ) so this time the WHOLE THING is going to be recorded and lots of pictures I'll be sharing lots of it w/ the JM ladies here
I just want to cry all the time. DH and I keep butting heads because things are just really stressful right now w/ finishing the cabin and the holidays. Living 1/2 in the RV and 1/2 in the cabin, things are spread out all over the place, and it's a mess and hard to clean properly.
I am constantly cold, constantly. I cannot keep warm.
We keep butting heads horribly and it's making me so mad. I just want to cry all the time and sleep until next month! UGH. This is the hardest winter we've endured and it's just sucking right now.
My head/neck is killing me (pregnancy thing) and I want a back and foot massage so bad. I do NOT like massages so DH never gives them to me b/c they just don't feel good but I want one so baaaaaaaaad and I know I won't get one.
Also, cabin fever. Seriously. My kids are driving me &*(%^&%(&* nuts. It's so bad, my 4 year old is going bonkers lately anyway since announcing the pregnancy. Trying to spend more 1 on 1 time w/ her and that is helping, but still... we all just need out of here quick.
/end rant. Hey, it's my journal and I can do what I want too
I am freaking out about m/c right now and not having an appt yet. Everything keeps getting pushed back and DH's hours are being cut b/c his dept. is changing over, which means way less $ for xmas and for me to make an appt since I have to pay OOP for a homebirth.
Doesn't matter. I'm emailing the MW when I get home and setting up an appt.
Hate the medical industry and insurance... oh lets not go down that path.
I am asking for the placenta to not block the uterus, I'm asking for my tilted uterus to get it's act together and I'm hoping that baby is cooperative. I might freak out if we can't hear the HB because MWs don't have ultrasound machines in their bedroom closet to double check.