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I've been in 'recovery' for quite a while now and despite that of course I have my downfalls...
We have been ttc so I have been trying to be good and eat adequately... But after my most recent loss (two days ago) I have been in a downward spiral... It's that whole mindset-- if I can't fix it, i'll just lose weight; that fixes all...
I dunno, just venting.. I think I've eaten 200 calories in the last 2 days.. *shrug* I dont know what's wrong with me. Self destructive nature, I suppose...
I'm sorry you're having a hard time - and I'm so sorry for you're loss - i know what that's like. It's hard going through something like that and i think many of us have in hard times fallen off the wagon a bit with our ED. but you can get back on. HUGS!