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As I've said in other posts, with DS we put him in his crib in the nursery from night 1. Our bedroom is quite small (def no room for a pack n play!), we don't like the idea of baby noises or adult noises keeping the other party awake, and figured we put all that time into the nursery that the kid might as well be in there. DS was never the best sleeper and I always wondered if he'd have been better off close to us/me at first.
SOOOO.... this time around we'll start with the crib in the other room, but I'm more open to the idea of borrowing a cosleeper thing like the Arm's Reach that sidecars to the bed, but I still totally don't get how other parents handle all the other middle of the night things besides feeding. For nursing, having baby right there so you don't have to get up sounds awesome. But what about really wet or poopy diapers? Or wet PJs?
How have BTDT mamas handled it? Do you just get up and go to the other room? Do you have space in your bedrooms to set up changing stations? And if so, isn't all that commotion going to wake Daddy (or Mommy if Daddy is doing a bottle feeding) up, which sucks? I do not understand the logistics here if we're trying to be as quiet and transitionless as possible. If I have to go in another room anyway, I'd rather keep baby over there so there is less motion for baby.
We didn't bed-share (at least not often), but we did have a pack n play set up in our room (it has a changing table attachment). So, for the first 3 or 4 months she slept in our room in the pack n play, and did all the changes and stuff in there. Luckily (for him), DH is a heavy sleeper, so it didn't ever bother him. He did sometimes get up and change her and then bring her to me to nurse.
But I agree...if there is no place in the parents' bedroom to do changes, it seems like it would be easier to have the baby in the same room where changes will happen--carrying baby back and forth doesn't seem like the best plan for me, as we tried to minimize activity at nighttime as much as possible.
We have a dresser in our room and I change baby on the dresser like a changing table as needed (no nursery here, baby shares our room totally) but I've also just used the cosleeper where baby is sleeping for a quick middle of the night change. I layer a sheet so I can just pull off top layer if there is a mess. Meaning I do sheet, a waterproof type pad then another sheet. If baby leaks at night or a diaper change goes wrong I just pul that top layer off and I'm good to go. The cosleeper has pockets that I keep wipes and dipes in for night time changes. I have a very low watt light in my room near the cosleeper if I need it basically a nightlight but maybe just a tiny bit brighter. As for waking my husband? It happens but he wakes if/when the other kids wake at night too. He adjusts and doesn't wake for every noise but in the beginning it's an adjustment for us all
We have the Arms Reach Cosleeper and it had a bunch of pockets so I just had diapers, wipes and everything else there so I could just sit up and change baby in the sleeper. If it was especially messy then we would get up and go to the nursery for a complete wipe down and change but it was rarely a problem for us.
For my daughter I never had a changing table. On my side of the bed I traded my night stand for a tall skinny drawers thing from ikea, so her diapers and clothes were right next to me. I'd just sit up and change her on the bed. When she started sleeping in the crib part of the night I'd bring her to our bed to change her. This time baby does have a dresser with a changing table and it's in our room. But I don't think I'll be doing that in the middle of the night lol. I'll have the arms reach co sleeper and I'll just put enough diaper and extra outfits in it to change baby as needed during the night. I'd rather not get out of bed unless absolutely necessary, and definitely don't want to stumble around with a baby in my arms.
We've done it both ways. With the last one, she was in our room from day 1, but we have enough room for a crib and dresser with a changing pad on top so she started out in the crib every night. Any diaper changes would be done right in our room. I would just turn on our bathroom light so it wasn't the overhead light. If it was an extreme mess, which sometimes happened on both the changing table and the bed, I stripped down what I could and then went somewhere else to sleep with her. My husband sleeps rather soundly so there were very, very few times where he ever heard us. There were even times where I removed the comforter and replaced it, and he never stirred.
It seems to be my experience that my kids sleep better when they are NOT in the same room as me. My 2nd and 3rd both had their own rooms from the day we brought them home, and they both slept through the night at 6-8 weeks. Maybe it's just a coincidence, but the 1st and 4th have both been in the same room as me, and they slept through much later. The 1st was over 2, and the the 4th was about 1.
A lot of it depends on how soundly either of you sleep, your comfort level, etc. Regardless of where they started out sleeping, whenever they woke in the middle of the night to be fed, they just came into bed with us for the rest of the night. Not that my post has been much help....
Mommy to Jasmine (18), Kirsten (14), Ana (13), Katie (3), Xavier (1), and Gunnar (born 10-15-14)
I know this sounds crazy, but my daughter rarely, if ever, pooped at night. I had the pack & play next to the bed, so I didn't even have to stand up to get her. It did have the changing table attachment, but I don't think I ever used it. Just changed her right on the bed, nursed her & put her right back in the pack & play. I had a very small dim lamp on the floor. DH never woke up, but I could probably drive a train through the room & he wouldn't notice. Nursing made me so hungry & thirsty, so once she was back to sleep, I always got up anyways to get a drink, so I took her diaper out with me.
I've had a pack n play in the past and changed them in the bassinet part of that, but this time I have the rock and play and I will just change her on our bed. My dh works nights so I don't have to worry about waking anyone up.
Krystal mommy to Alexander-7, Elizabeth-3 and our baby Morgan born with Angel Wings 2-27-08
Mia bedshares with us, and has since she was 3 weeks. She was in the bed with us(no co-sleeper). What we had was a plastic basket with some diapers and wipes. I'd change her right in the bed with us. I was lazy lol. Mia rarely ever peed enough to need new pjs.
Miss B: September 3rd, 2008(stepdaughter)
Amelia Rose Annabelle aka Mia: December 1st, 2011
John Henry Clifton aka Henry: April 11th 2013
Elizabeth Flora Ruth: March 6th, 2015