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Newborn + taking care of your other children....

Forum: 2013 Playroom


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  • 2 Post By MamaLemonade
  • 1 Post By keekopeeko
  • 4 Post By writergurrl
  • 1 Post By lhug_nar
  • 2 Post By Logiesmomma
  • 1 Post By mommamuffin
  • 3 Post By .:fearless:.

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June 10th, 2013, 10:31 PM
OnesOnTheWay's Avatar #3 Due November 2016
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Southwest
Posts: 4,651
Do any BTDT mamas have any advice on how to cope with caring for a newborn and your other children at the same time?
I have some huge fears that I am not going to be able to meet my 6 year old's needs. She starts 1st grade a few weeks after baby is due. I worry that because I'll be functioning on little to no sleep that I will struggle to get her to school in the morning. DH will be back at work and he goes to work early in the am and will be long gone.. so I will have no other help.

Any tips/advice/encouragement?
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June 11th, 2013, 03:49 AM
MamaLemonade's Avatar ~~Whitney~~
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Somewhere in CA
Posts: 2,881
I have no advice on the school thing as I don't have school age children yet. But i do have 2 already at home and the biggest thing that helped us was getting the older child involved. He would bring me diapers, wipes, her pacifier, her blankets etc... When she was napping I spent time with him, we would cuddle & nap if possible, play games, read. I made sure he knew he was still my babe, and kept him in he loop with everything. This time they both are older and I plan on doing the same thing. It is rough the first couple days but everyone will fall into place
OnesOnTheWay and apradams like this.
Mommy to:C(6), M(5), T(2)
Married to my <3 since 8/09

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June 11th, 2013, 04:40 AM
tela's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: PA
Posts: 15,207
i'm scared about this as well. jacob has been my one and only for 4+ years. he still demands a LOT of mommy time. i remember how exhausted i was those first few weeks/months, and i have no idea how i'm going to do it again AND keep jacob happy. let alone when i go back to work at 12 weeks. oy.
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June 11th, 2013, 05:57 AM
keekopeeko's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: virginia
Posts: 7,949
It does change things.. And it adds complications.. But things fall into place!

I have found babywearing to be my absolute saving grace numerous times.. I am not looking forward to wrangling 4 kids every school morning and afternoon (only my oldest goes to school) but right now I am just l

forward to school ENDING next week!

I figure next year the routine will include waking up and nursin the baby, popping the baby in a wrap, taking care of the other 3.. Then off to school !
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~Em, Married to Matt since 7/3/04. Mommy to Layla 3/29/06, Eva 10/18/08, Zeke 2/4/11, and Jonah 7/28/13

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June 11th, 2013, 07:43 AM
Shea131's Avatar Peyton Rylee's Mommy!!
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Illinois
Posts: 4,636
I'm worried about this as well. I've had a couple meltdowns about my DD not being my only baby anymore.

Thank you Quantum_Leap for my fabulous signature!!!
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June 11th, 2013, 07:48 AM
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 495
You're actually lucky that your elder child will be in school. That gives you a large chunk of time during the day to be with just baby, and that includes the age-old advice of napping when the baby naps. I strongly recommend it. Forget the dishes. Forget sweeping the floor. NAP! It will help you be in better shape to get your elder child ready for school.

When I was pregnant with my second kid, I got this advice: If the new baby is crying and needs something, and your older kid needs something, take care of your older kid's needs first. For one thing, this need is likely to be easier/less time-consuming (it is quicker to give an older kid a hug/kiss and a drink than it is to nurse a baby). For another, it helps make sure that your older kid knows they are still important, that they haven't been completely usurped by the baby, and that you will always love them.

I didn't follow that advice all the time, but I did do it a lot. And it seemed to work out okay.
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June 11th, 2013, 07:49 AM
lhug_nar's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I usually babywear when I have a chance. It's going to take a couple weeks to get into a routine but it does help to get the older kiddos involved with bringing diapers, wipes, etc. Know that there is going to be a transition period and there may be some tears on both your part and theirs but it's a big change and one that they WILL adjust to.

Remember to BREATHE and try not to stress about stuff too much. It does get easier!
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June 11th, 2013, 08:56 AM
MeggysMommy's Avatar 3 + 1
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Oregon
Posts: 10,202
I've been super nervous about this myself. Megan is still definitely at the "I need someone to help me with things stage". She is pretty independent but basic needs she needs someone. Hoping that it goes better than my worse case scenario is playing out in my head.
Cay wife to David mom to Megan 10/01/2010 and April 7/14/2013

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June 11th, 2013, 09:34 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: SB, California
Posts: 1,280
Baby wearing will save your life. Do as much as you can to prepare for the day the night before. Give your daughter jobs she can complete on her own while you feed the baby, like putting on her socks and shoes, getting her jacket in, brushing her teeth. I pack lunches and backpacks the night before and we pick out our clothes the night before and set them on the end of their beds. Mornings can be rushed but I think dinner is way harder! My babies and big kids all get fussy around 5 when I need to make dinner. Then it's the non stop madness of cooking, eating, bath time, story time & bedtime. If I didn't wear my baby I wouldn't have been able to do it all with my last baby.
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June 11th, 2013, 07:55 PM
mommamuffin's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
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Originally Posted by Shea131 View Post
I'm worried about this as well. I've had a couple meltdowns about my DD not being my only baby anymore.
Same here! I know I will love and bond with this baby just as much as I have with Isabelle, but right now it's hard for me to fathom loving anything or anyone as much as as I love her. She demands A LOT of me, cries and kicks and screams when I try to pass her off to anyone else (including Daddy). MommaMommaMomma all the time. We've tried talking about the baby coming, but she's just barely over two and doesn't seem to really "get it". So, I'm pretty nervous and actually feel a little guilty to be taking some of Mommy and Daddy away from her.

As for advice on how to handle two kids, I have no idea. But thank you for making the post because I've been wondering that myself!
Shea131 likes this.
Our little number two, Leonardo, was born July 26, 2013. Welcome baby Leo!

http://i1359.photobucket.com/albums/q796/DLLovell/SquishyDDC_zps630852e9.gif[/IMG] [IMG]

[FONT="Garamond"][COLOR="Green"]Christina (me), Steve (SO), Isabelle & Leonardo.
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June 11th, 2013, 08:58 PM
.:fearless:.'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: ohio
Posts: 11,295
Well, my dahling.... You just do it Ya'll see how many I have, and that doesn't include my step kids lol! It REALLY helps to have some type of a schedule/routine. Yes, you will be sleep deprived..but guess what..since your oldest will go to school..you can come home and nap if you chose to! WOO! You'll be a zombie, there will be days where you forget to brush your own teeth (or your DD), dinner may consist of cold sandwiches and chips (which kids love by the way!)...but you will make it through! I promise you It seems SO daunting right now, and it won't be roses, but you will get into a groove and just go
Now, let me remind myself of all these things before K shows up

Also, if you haven't already...give your DD some responsibilities. All of my kids have them, even my newly turned 5 year old He showers himself, puts his own crap away, brings his laundry down and so on. It will help, a lot!
Ethan Michael 6*13*2000, Toryn Elizabeth 6*18*04, Julian Alexander 2*8*08, Jaxson Lea 5*4*12
Married to my best friend since 3*26*12
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June 12th, 2013, 06:56 PM
LilSunshine's Avatar ♥ Super Moderator ♥
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: USA
Posts: 32,198
I'm hoping that DS will be a big help and that involving him will make him feel worthwhile. DH is planning on taking some time off too, so he can play outside with him and play games with him while I'm feeding the baby.

September 2009 @ 6 weeks May 2011 @ 11 weeks
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June 13th, 2013, 11:16 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,142
Despite what it may feel like in the beginning, everyone will adjust and there will be a normal routine again. I'll have a five year old, two year old, and newborn come July and I am going to be homeschooling the five year old come August/September. It'll all work out though I have no idea yet how to manage getting out of the house solo with three little ones in tow.
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June 14th, 2013, 01:42 AM
ninja_mommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Oahu
Posts: 7,228
Yeah, I wonder how things will all work out. I'm sure they will. I'm most nervous about making it places on time. I'm already bad about it even though I budget plenty of time. I'm sure I'll be late and probably not look so presentable!

Oct '11 June '12
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