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We have kept this pregnancy very quiet until the last few days, as I wanted to wait until I had finished playing netball before we announced. However over the three weeks I have heard of 3 girls with early miscarriages, 1 who lost their baby at 15 weeks and one who had a stillborn at 39 weeks, all in our small town of about 600 people.
Really surprising and a little concerning as so far I am the only one still pregnant. Lost quite a few on my other DIG (Australian one) as well.
Oh wow. :[ I felt the same way. I kept seeing things about miscarriages and no heartbeat (plus having a miscarriage myself before this pregnancy...) and having my first appointment so far out... I felt like I was going to implode from impatience. Seeing the heartbeat was amazing and lifted a lot of my worries right off my shoulders, though. :] Just gotta focus on the good things and put out the bad.
I am really struggling to connect with this bubba or pregnancy at all and I think all these things aren't helping. I was hoping once I saw the 12 week scan I would feel differently but I don't. Will keep plodding along and hope that the excitement eventually kicks in!
I think that not connecting at this stage is typical. You don't want to be too attached in case the worst happens. It's a defense thing. Also, when all you have is pg symptoms it doesn't make it feel real, you just feel sick. Once baby starts kicking you, that will help. Unfortunately that worry is never going away. That will stick with you even as your kids grow up!
The just feeling sick, not pregnant...I have been telling Justin this all the time. He just looks at me like, huh? He just thinks it's the same thing. And after the miscarriages and taking so many months to conceive, I still have to remind myself that we are actually having this baby. I thought I was just being weird, because I felt like I connected earlier with my other babies. I guess it's just probably normal. I love my baby...but I struggle to feel that he/she is real.
And that is really odd about your small town. That's about the size of my town also. Makes ya wonder doesn't it?
I can understand not feeling connected in a way you might want/expect, especially surrounded by so many losses. A dating u/s last week helped me to feel a little more confident and start to get excited, but I seem to be one of those people who experiences pregnancy as a likely future baby, not necessarily an actively present baby ... I think we all connect in our own time. There is no magical perfect way to bond, I know for some people it takes a while after their baby is born to really connect - it did for me, and now he's my best little buddy.
I hope you can relax and give yourself the time you need. It will come.