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  #1  
November 23rd, 2009, 09:58 AM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
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I posted on the Fertility Charting board, but I'm not TTC. I just want to chart to avoid. I've just recently stopped using the NuvaRing because of side effects and have decided that I will not be using any more hormonal birth control. I even had a ParaGard IUD that fell into my cervix after it was inserted, so I'm just letting my body rest for the time being, probably for a few years at least. I would like to have one more child, but I can not convince my SO that we should TTC so ... here I am.

By the way, for those who don't know me, I'm Rachel, mom of 21 year old Sarah, 18 year old James and 4 year old Daniel. I also have two step sons, 10 year old William and 8 year old Clayton who live with us full time.
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  #2  
November 23rd, 2009, 11:30 AM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Alberta, Canada
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Welcome Rachel! Take a few minutes to read through the FAQ and Online Resources stickies. That should help you understand the various options available for charting to avoid. Once you have an idea which option would suit you best, we can help you get started!

The fastest and most reliable way to learn is to work with an instructor. There are live classes, online courses, home study courses that all pair you up with a teacher for personalized support.
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  #3  
November 23rd, 2009, 02:06 PM
SavaAngel's Avatar Mama to AJ & Katie
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Welcome Rachel! Good Luck! I hope you get your SO to agree to TTC - how fun would that me to be pregnant at the same time!
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  #4  
November 24th, 2009, 06:49 AM
fka teresarunningmommy
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Michigan
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I think I would start by figuring out which method you want to use. That is where I am at. I ordered a couple books - TCOYF and the Billings Method. I haven't got them in yet, but that is where I am at. For now I am using temperature charting until I figure things out a little better and since I am also charting to conceive. I just like seeing my temps, but trying to get a better understanding of charting CM to avoid. Dh is thankfully doing really good with the abstaining thing while I figure things out.
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  #5  
November 24th, 2009, 09:46 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Thanks everyone! I'm going to look on amazon for a book or two. I've started temping already, but mostly to get the hang of things. I also started bleeding and I'm not sure if it's the start of an AF or just because I'm coming off hormones.

I doubt we'll go with the NFP because Neely is not sold on that at all. I've tried to convince him that it's safe, but he's not buying it. Thinks I'm trying to trick him into an "oops". We'll probably use the trusty old "pull and pray" method during my most fertile times, once I figure out my cycle and all.
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  #6  
November 24th, 2009, 10:58 PM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That's funny because statistically, modern forms of NFP have a much higher effectiveness rate than pull & pray does. Maybe he's thinking NFP is the Rhythm or Calender Method? Those are not very reliable.
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  #7  
November 25th, 2009, 04:57 AM
fka teresarunningmommy
Join Date: Feb 2004
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShawnaCAN View Post
That's funny because statistically, modern forms of NFP have a much higher effectiveness rate than pull & pray does. Maybe he's thinking NFP is the Rhythm or Calender Method? Those are not very reliable.

I think NFP requires a lot of trust in a relationship. My dh and I were talking about it the other night when I told him he was in charge because I wasn't sure I could hold out and not try. He said back to me "it's not like I can take your temperature for you". I think that it is two fold the reason men get nervous with NFP/FAM, one they don't trust the method, and two they do not feel in control of the birth control.
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  #8  
November 25th, 2009, 07:35 AM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by teresarunningmommy View Post
I think NFP requires a lot of trust in a relationship. My dh and I were talking about it the other night when I told him he was in charge because I wasn't sure I could hold out and not try. He said back to me "it's not like I can take your temperature for you". I think that it is two fold the reason men get nervous with NFP/FAM, one they don't trust the method, and two they do not feel in control of the birth control.
Yes, that is true. That's part of the reason I think it's really important for husbands to attend the classes with their wives. Then they can understand the science for themselves and see just how much control they do have, but it comes in the form of self control. A husband can't observe his wife's fertility for her, but he can understand how to read charts and how to apply the rules. Then they can review the chart together and the wife doesn't have to be good cop/bad cop about BD. When both understand how it all works, then each fertile day it's a mutual decision to wait or try. Plus, if the wife misunderstands something, there's a good chance her husband will catch it - two pairs of eyes going over things leads to higher effectiveness and more communication overall.
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  #9  
November 25th, 2009, 06:24 PM
benandali's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Ohio
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Yeah Teresa that's a really good point. My husband doesn't feel in control but is fully supportive. He gets frustrated when it's a no day and I swear sometimes he thinks I'm just making it up! But I'm like here...look at my chart!
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