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Which type of NFP/FAM??


Forum: Natural Family Planning and FAM

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  #1  
July 21st, 2007, 12:20 PM
mrsroseblack's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Originally from Texas, In Delaware and moving to Alaska!
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I have been reading the resources and found that the Crighton is something I am not going to use but would like to do another form of NFP, or rather FAM, I believe.

I am exclusively breastfeeding and am a SAHM so I hope to do so until Jett is a year old at least. I would like to do a natural form of prevention but I will need to use condoms for the week I am ovulating. I am extremely fertile and don't want to rely solely on a natural form during that week. I am too apprehensive.

I am fine with this. I just need to know which plan supports this. I visited the other plan website and didn't get any information on the plan itself.

What I mean is, which one am I talking about? lol And how does it work? I am not even 3 weeks PP but I need to spend the rest of this time learning exactly what I am doing before I am cleared to DTD again.

Thanks for all your help!
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  #2  
July 23rd, 2007, 09:44 AM
SavaAngel's Avatar Mama to AJ & Katie
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I am learning the BOM method online. I like it a lot. I have used condoms on it and it just effects your discharges the day following intercourse. I chose a method that didn't require temping because DS is my alarm clock and we don't always get up at the same time every day and I get up a lot at night and toss and turn. With temping you have to sleep 4 hours without getting up or your temp will be off.

HTH.
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  #3  
July 26th, 2007, 09:11 PM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm not sure what you mean about being apprehensive about natural forms of prevention during the week of ovulation. Natural Family Planning means you abstain completely during times of fertility, even condoms are too risky. This is because barriers/spermicides have failure rates, so if you're using something like that at a time when you are most fertile - the chance of pregnancy is actually quite high. I would be more apprehensive about using condoms during times of fertility than abstaining! When you learn to correctly evaluate your fertility on a day by day basis, it's virtually impossible to get pregnant if you follow the rules of NFP - even before your periods return, even while you're breastfeeding (because you can ovulate prior to your first post partum period, NFP teaches you to watch for that). We use the Billings Ovulation Method because it was found to be 99.64% reliable in it's clinical trials.

But, if your personal preference is FAM (it carries the same effectiveness as whichever barrier is chosen), you can easily learn to chart post partum. You can learn from an instructor, through an online course, or by reading a book.

Hope that clears up some of the confusion!
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  #4  
July 27th, 2007, 09:00 AM
mrsroseblack's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
I'm not sure what you mean about being apprehensive about natural forms of prevention during the week of ovulation. Natural Family Planning means you abstain completely during times of fertility, even condoms are too risky. This is because barriers/spermicides have failure rates, so if you're using something like that at a time when you are most fertile - the chance of pregnancy is actually quite high. I would be more apprehensive about using condoms during times of fertility than abstaining! When you learn to correctly evaluate your fertility on a day by day basis, it's virtually impossible to get pregnant if you follow the rules of NFP - even before your periods return, even while you're breastfeeding (because you can ovulate prior to your first post partum period, NFP teaches you to watch for that). We use the Billings Ovulation Method because it was found to be 99.64% reliable in it's clinical trials.

But, if your personal preference is FAM (it carries the same effectiveness as whichever barrier is chosen), you can easily learn to chart post partum. You can learn from an instructor, through an online course, or by reading a book.

Hope that clears up some of the confusion![/b]

I just don't want to be stuck with abstinence for 1 week out of the month. That kind of kills the fun part of sex... making it to where I can't have sex at certain times...

Anyway, we've never had a problem with condoms before... no busting or leaking or anything. I'll have to find a book on it or something because there are no classes around here.
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  #5  
July 27th, 2007, 10:31 AM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Gotcha! Yeah, the abstinence can be a little scary at first...but from personal experience, I can say that it has definitely provided some huge benefits in our marriage that I never expected at all! We may have to wait during a certain part of the cycle, but when we are together again it's like a honeymoon. It's so special and it really helps us not to take eachother for granted. It has also increased the respect we have for eachother. Seeing that my husband is willing to wait for me so we can be together without anything between us shows me how much he really cherishes me as I am. It's pretty counter-culture in this day and age to suggest that we treat sexuality in the same way as other good things in life (in moderation) - there *are* perks to periodic abstinence. It deepens the non-sexual parts of the relationship - the friendship part, the respect part, the self control part (which comes in handy in other areas like temper, or spending, or wherever self control is needed.) Every couple has different dynamics, but for us it completely FLOORED me how abstaining was the one thing that finally helped me overcome my distrust. I'll just share a little about that because that's what this board is about...sharing the nitty gritty of our NFP experiences. When I was very young, I saw my Grandparent's marriage fall apart because of infidelity. I had this irrational fear that no matter how great a guy I found, he would inevitably cheat some day. I knew in my head that it was stupid, but I was always suspicious anyway. My Dh has never given me any reason to be worried, but I still held on to that fear. It wasn't him telling me how much he cared that helped me trust, it wasn't him being an awesome husband that helped me trust, it was abstinence because of NFP! One day, like a light bulb went off, I realized that if he could control his desires with me - even when his desire was very strong at times - then I could trust that if he ever found himself in a tempting situation outside of our marriage - he would also be able to control his desires there too. It showed me that he was the master of his body, it wasn't the master of him the way I thought all guys were. The moral of the story is that when it comes to periodic abstinence, there is more to it than meets the eye. Effectiveness in avoiding pregnancy is the main perk, but there are others that can touch much deeper parts of the relationship.

But to each his own so to speak, there are lots of great books out there and I am sure you will have no trouble learning to chart. If you would like any assistance double checking to see if there are any classes near you, feel free to contact me privately and tell me where you live. There are also several methods which offer online and correspondance courses. Best wishes!

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  #6  
July 27th, 2007, 11:44 PM
SavaAngel's Avatar Mama to AJ & Katie
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As for the abstinence - it is difficult, especially with my DH and the fact that I have lots of wet days right now since it doesn't seem I have ovulated yet since I had my son. We don't really know for sure cause I started charting when my son was 7 months old. I was breastfeeding up until this past week with my son.
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  #7  
July 28th, 2007, 10:56 AM
mrsroseblack's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Originally from Texas, In Delaware and moving to Alaska!
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Quote:
Gotcha! Yeah, the abstinence can be a little scary at first...but from personal experience, I can say that it has definitely provided some huge benefits in our marriage that I never expected at all! We may have to wait during a certain part of the cycle, but when we are together again it's like a honeymoon. It's so special and it really helps us not to take eachother for granted. It has also increased the respect we have for eachother. Seeing that my husband is willing to wait for me so we can be together without anything between us shows me how much he really cherishes me as I am. It's pretty counter-culture in this day and age to suggest that we treat sexuality in the same way as other good things in life (in moderation) - there *are* perks to periodic abstinence. It deepens the non-sexual parts of the relationship - the friendship part, the respect part, the self control part (which comes in handy in other areas like temper, or spending, or wherever self control is needed.) Every couple has different dynamics, but for us it completely FLOORED me how abstaining was the one thing that finally helped me overcome my distrust. I'll just share a little about that because that's what this board is about...sharing the nitty gritty of our NFP experiences. When I was very young, I saw my Grandparent's marriage fall apart because of infidelity. I had this irrational fear that no matter how great a guy I found, he would inevitably cheat some day. I knew in my head that it was stupid, but I was always suspicious anyway. My Dh has never given me any reason to be worried, but I still held on to that fear. It wasn't him telling me how much he cared that helped me trust, it wasn't him being an awesome husband that helped me trust, it was abstinence because of NFP! One day, like a light bulb went off, I realized that if he could control his desires with me - even when his desire was very strong at times - then I could trust that if he ever found himself in a tempting situation outside of our marriage - he would also be able to control his desires there too. It showed me that he was the master of his body, it wasn't the master of him the way I thought all guys were. The moral of the story is that when it comes to periodic abstinence, there is more to it than meets the eye. Effectiveness in avoiding pregnancy is the main perk, but there are others that can touch much deeper parts of the relationship.

But to each his own so to speak, there are lots of great books out there and I am sure you will have no trouble learning to chart. If you would like any assistance double checking to see if there are any classes near you, feel free to contact me privately and tell me where you live. There are also several methods which offer online and correspondance courses. Best wishes![/b]
Wow... I never thought of it like that. We are very Christian so everything sexual is between us and nothing else. I will talk to my DH and see what he thinks about it. Then I will go to the library and see if they have a book on it so I can better understand. My city and state are under my avatar... how much do classes cost? Thanks so much!
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  #8  
July 28th, 2007, 11:35 AM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 11,397
Well, if you want a few good reads not so much about the "how-to" of NFP, but the Christian considerations regarding married sexuality here are few:
"Open Embrace: A Protestant Couple Rethinks Contraception" by Sam and Bethany Torode
"Good News about Sex and Marriage" by Christopher West

Books about how to chart:
The Billings Ovulation Method by Evelyn Billings and Ann Westmore
Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler

As for classes, here's what I found:

Billings Ovulation Method

None in Delaware, but lots in Maryland, and New Jersey. I know a PHENOMENAL lady in Maryland, I put a star by her name. There's also the online course.

Maryland:
Lynn Carol Fisher
Annapolis, Maryland 21403
410-263-3289
natfamplan@aol.com

Jennifer Hunter
Annapolis, MD 21146
202-626-2857

Hanna Klaus, M.D.
Bethesda, Maryland 20817-3810
301- 530-9383
301-897-9323
hannaklaus@earthlink.net

*Sara Peterson*
Joppa, Maryland 21085
410-612-9117
sfp@thosepetersons.com

Alice Harris, RN
Severna Park, MD 21146
410-544-2895
aharris@familink.com

Theresa Mandeville
Severna Park, MD 21146
410-647-8158
Tmandev@aol.com

Laura McClay, RN
Severna Park, MD 21146
410-647-2857
mcclay@annap.infi.net

New Jersey
Steve & Jeanine Juth
Bernardsville, NJ 07924
908-953-8373
sjuth@verizon.net

Perlita & Rene Tolentino
Jersey City, NJ 07302
201-451-2161
rptolentino@comcast.net

Fr. Carlos Viego
Spanish/English
Newark, NJ 07104
973-482-6663
frcarlosviego@gmail.com


Damon Owens
West Orange, NJ 07052
973-847-0165
damonowens@comcast.net



Couple to Couple League Sympto Thermal Method

Gonzalo & Cecilia Escobedo
Bear, Delaware
(302) 832-3442 ESCOBEDO@CCLDE.ORG

Andrew & Catherine Riddle
Ellendale, Delaware
302-684-4318 delawarenfp@gmail.com

Lots of Creighton Model teachers around too, but you already said you weren't interested in that one.

Hope that helps!
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