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  #1  
October 23rd, 2011, 06:22 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 2,090
I originally posted this on another subforum, and I will link my OP to that board in case you want to see the replies I made. But as not to clutter up that board (unless you want to respond to someone there) maybe we should continue this convo here. Another momma pointed me here, so hopefully I can get some answers!

The original post I made and link (the second post on the forum is the original post... the order got messed up somehow):
http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f4...cate-kids.html (At what point - Move to Medicate Kids)

At what point did you all decide to medicate your children? Have any of you transferred your children to a new school, and it made a big difference?

BTW... I might be popping in here more for help... my name is Jenn, the person in question is my boyfriends son. We have been together 4 years, off and on for 7. My boyfriend has custody of his son, and my daughter is not my boyfriends daughter. We are very much an involved family with each other, and our kids love each other. My boyfriends son does have a bit of a history with his school, I don't think I fully touched upon it in that post because I have talked about it on the board before and the girls should remember at least some of it. I can talk more about it if you guys would like, and think it would help.

So I welcome any advice you girls might have! Looking forward to getting to know you too!
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  #2  
October 23rd, 2011, 06:38 AM
AlexKatieAiden Mommy's Avatar Linda
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Wisconsin
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Welcome Jenn. I am Linda, mommy to 3 including a 6 year old with autism and ADHD, a 5 year old with probable ADHD and a 2 year old who is well more active than most but not out of control. I also have ADHD myself, and can tell you that I wish my mom would have known about it sooner. I was 9 when I was diagnosed and started on meds but by that point I was already labeled "the bad kid". And it stuck with me for quite a while. I haven't read your other post yet (my 6 year old needs attention) but will come back and comment more later after I read it.
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  #3  
October 23rd, 2011, 06:59 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlexKatieAiden Mommy View Post
Welcome Jenn. I am Linda, mommy to 3 including a 6 year old with autism and ADHD, a 5 year old with probable ADHD and a 2 year old who is well more active than most but not out of control. I also have ADHD myself, and can tell you that I wish my mom would have known about it sooner. I was 9 when I was diagnosed and started on meds but by that point I was already labeled "the bad kid". And it stuck with me for quite a while. I haven't read your other post yet (my 6 year old needs attention) but will come back and comment more later after I read it.
Yeah, he has been labeled the "bad kid" by some teachers though his principal has been mostly understanding and such. But he's looking at being expelled so he might really, REALLY need to have something give with his behavior.
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  #4  
October 23rd, 2011, 12:11 PM
AlexKatieAiden Mommy's Avatar Linda
Join Date: Apr 2009
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Being labeled the bad kid sticks with you, not forever but quite a while, so a switch of schools and a fresh start might not be such a bad idea, IMHO. My 6 year old isn't medicated because we found other things that he uses to control it, deep pressure, noise cancelling head phones, and a low sugar diet. I wouldn't hesitate trying meds if I thought it was necessary for him to be able to function successfully in school or other settings. I know how big of a change I am when I am not on my meds, I cannot concentrate, am extremely distractable, have next to no impulse control, etc (and to me being without meds is like trying to focus while sitting in the middle of a high way with all the noise, smells, and cars sailing around you. No one would be able to concentrate or sit still ).
For the children who need them ADHD meds are a godsend to help them function. I often hear parents say that they wish they would have tried them sooner and their child wouldn't have suffered in school as long as they did. But also hear other parents who find natural approaches just as effeciant as meds, which is great too. It's all about finding what works for the child.
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  #5  
October 23rd, 2011, 01:33 PM
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Well tomorrow is the meeting/call (Im not sure which my SO has with the principal) to see what is going on. I told him that if he has any indication that he is going to be expelled, that I will help him get all the information he needs to show why this school is a better fit and why he shouldn't be expelled. Additionally... he needs to get to the doctor again soon and he will be put on medication if thats what it takes to keep him in school. He is just hoping all goes well, he just doesn't want him to be expelled from the district. He still wants him to switch schools, but is scared about an expulsion jeopardizing that chance. I am glad that I know a lot about his educational rights and know a fair amount of rights of SPED students too, and thats why I said that at this point in time, it might be time to "label" him because at least it's going to help save him in instances where him acting out is because of a disability. If we can just get him in a new school, a new setting, and no medication is needed, great! But I am not quite sure he will be free from meds forever... if it's even ADHD. It can be something else, but whatever it is... medication may very well help him a ton.

We shall see how tomorrow goes. Its the first step, just seeing what the school says. Its pretty much set that at the end of the semester he will switch schools, unless the school puts a bigger push on him switching before then.

We are just greatly hoping he doesnt get expelled tomorrow
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  #6  
October 23rd, 2011, 02:15 PM
AlexKatieAiden Mommy's Avatar Linda
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Make sure to bring up a 504 behavior plan, and see if that helps. Sometimes just having extra support at school is a big help. Here is the information on the 504...
What is a 504 Behavior Plan?
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  #7  
October 24th, 2011, 08:30 PM
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The school didn't call my SO today. So not only did they not call my SO until late Friday night after the incident happening Thursday... they didn't even call him today. My SO had work today and school himself and he just wanted to see if the school would drop the ball again contacting him... and they did.

So he isn't too concerned that his son is going to be expelled, but he is going to raise hell over the fact that there is absolutely no communication happening in a timely manner.
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  #8  
October 24th, 2011, 09:45 PM
AlexKatieAiden Mommy's Avatar Linda
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Froggy View Post
So he isn't too concerned that his son is going to be expelled, but he is going to raise hell over the fact that there is absolutely no communication happening in a timely manner.
That's good that the threat of him being expelled is pretty much out of the picture but the lack of communication from the school is scary.
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  #9  
October 25th, 2011, 12:35 AM
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Yup. He wasnt going to press the school, he wanted to see what they would do. When they called on Friday night I was all "What the heck... WHY weren't you called RIGHT THEN AND THERE??!!?!?" Granted I am in education, but I call/write my daughters teacher right when there is a problem. When my future students have a problem... they will have a phone call home or a note ASAP. Not a day later.... at night.

So when we didnt get a call over the weekend, we kind of expected it. But nothing all day? My SO was busy and didnt want to press it too much, because really... its not his job. Additionally, he wanted to see what the school would do. Its his mindset that if he waits to see what the school wants to do and if they do say they want him expelled, this is only ammo for him to use against the school and push for him to just be allowed to transfer schools. Its not his job to chase down the school. So while he wants to talk to the school, he does want to see how long it takes the school to call him. Just in case anything happens it helps him have a case.

So far, it's okay, and that's good. But the lack of having a phone call or anything isnt good at all. Hes just waiting until the end of the semester, waiting until he can get his son into the new school!
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  #10  
October 25th, 2011, 05:18 PM
LindseyE117's Avatar Wookie's Girl
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Hopefully you can find some answers soon. I am glad that you came over to this board.
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  #11  
October 27th, 2011, 07:16 PM
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Everything is okay... the school finally called and the boy never felt threatened and said that he wasn't threatened at all. But it is pretty much BS that no one called until today.

Not sure what is going to happen for the rest of the year, my SO is mad at the school that there has been no conversation until now. He wants to transfer schools, and wants to look into medication and therapy. He's exploring options now, this was an eye opener for him at least. He doesnt want his son kicked out of school, even though nothing came out of it. His son is angry, very angry, even though this wasn't anything like the school said it was. He is going to find out more tonight so Ill find out more later, and Ill update everyone later!
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