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  #1  
November 11th, 2011, 11:13 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 451
HI! I usually only post in the cloth diapering forum but I was wandering around and found you ladies..My name is Missy I am a SAHM/WAHM/foster to adopt mom to 6 kids.. My oldest is the only one I had.. she is now 18.. I have a foster daughter that is almost 14 recently diagnosed with ADHD and take 20mg of adderall xr in the am and 10mg at noon, next is an 11 yr old gir(adopted)l that was diagnosed with ADD about 3 yrs ago and takes 10 mg adderallxr in the am and 5mg at noon, then a 8yr old son(adopted) that was diagnosed at 3 with ADHD with aggressivity and impulsivity(they stand out the most) and he takes 15 mg of adderall xr in the am and 5 mg at noon and then a 7 yr old foster to soon be adopted son that was diagnosed 1 yr ago with ADHD and was born with FASD he takes 15mg of adderall xr in the am...and a almost 3yr old boy(adopted) that is full of energy(his bio mom has ADHD)...my question to you is how do you do it.. I am loosing my mind with all this.. I love my kids dearly but the don't respect me, obey me.. my 8 yr old yells at us constantly...the 11 yr old is horrible.. won't do anything we ask just talks back full time...is there any trick to all this.. before I go insane!!!
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  #2  
November 11th, 2011, 12:52 PM
AlexKatieAiden Mommy's Avatar Linda
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,009
I'm so glad you found us, we are a slower board but everyone here is very supportive and awesome.

Wow, I don't know what else to say. We have so much in common. I could have written that except I only have 3 kiddos and they are quite a bit younger than your 6.

I'm Linda, single mommy to Alexzander (my only bio) who has autism and ADHD, my soon to be adopted daughter (biologically my niece) who has pFAS (partial fetal alcohol syndrome) and ADHD (in the process of getting an actual diagnosis, but I know it's true), and my soon to be adopted son who is two (biologically my nephew) and most likely has pFAS and ADHD as well. I am also a foster mom.

Honestly the only advice I have is to be very consistant. Be on top of your game when it comes to meds, makes sure you tell the doc exactly what is going on and make sure that he/she is knowledgable about FAS.
I know its hard but if you ignore your 8 year old when he yells he will eventually stop doing it. Explain to him that you will not listen to him when he yells but you would be more than happy to listen to him if he talks to you.
Also, if you haven't already, look up sensory processing disorder (spd). With my son and daughter, deep pressure (example, bear hugs) has a calming effect on them. My son has a weighted blanket and weighted lap pad to keep him on track. My daughter does better with bear hugs. If you have a therapy place around you call them up and see if they do sensory integration therapy (its usually called OT but some OT doesn't include sensory integration) and will screen your children.
Reward jars are very effective with my children (a jar that has a specific amount of something they really like, I take out some if they misbehave, and put some more in when they are behaving). It might not be as effective with your kiddos cause they are a bit older.
If you have anymore questions, need to share, vent, etc we are always here. I think all of us can understand the frustrations of raising a child/ren with ADD/ADHD.
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  #3  
November 11th, 2011, 06:12 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,417
Hi Missy, my name is Missy I have a 16 year old son with adhd on adderall xr 20mg in the am.

We have our struggles at times but what has helped us the most is focusing on the positive. And what I mean is this: My son's favorite things in life are his cell phone, xbox and computer. These things are privileges for him... he has to earn time with each one by doing good things and having a good attitude towards everyone in the house. If he is acting bad he just doesn't get time with his "toys". So in essence I don't ever ground him or take away his fun, it is something that he earns. It is a psychological thing that his physiologist taught me when he was 5.

We have a chores chart on our fridge which helps us all stay on task with chores each day.

If we are going somewhere or the routine of the house is going to change I try to give the boys as much notice beforehand as possible. Like "In 20 minutes we are eating dinner" or "in 15 minutes we are going to the grocery store".

Big hugs help when they are a little out of control.


I hope these help. Welcome again!!
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  #4  
November 19th, 2011, 05:04 PM
lovemyboysandabbey2's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: wisconsin
Posts: 82,834
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welcome!
I am Angie and the mommy of 4..my 13 and 9 year old are my ADHD kids, Tyler (13) is ADHD and bi-polar, we just recently added a pill in the afternoon and went to the maximum for his bi-polar meds and I ca proudly say I can see a differnce, I have my kid back!
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