Do you talk to your mom about ttc?

Admin-pattyandthemoos · #1 July 12th, 2009, 06:47 AM

Does she know you are ttc? How supportive is she?

AmandaEliz · #2 July 12th, 2009, 06:54 AM

I'm still in the closet IRL about TTC this time around. Only my JM friends know (you all & the ladies in my PR). Mom was really supportive the 1st time. She lives in PA, but always came down after my mc's & both of my surgeries. This time though, I know she would think I was nuts to be TTC again so soon. Ethan is a bit of a, um, handful. She will be seriously surprised if/when I do get my BFP.

k8liz311 · #3 July 12th, 2009, 08:30 AM

No I haven't told my mom that I'm TTC. I didn't tell her the first time either. I don't know why.. but I don't really tell people IRL. I think i'd rather keep it private.. It's been 7 months too so I would be really annoyed telling people "no.. I'm not pregnant yet". I'd rather just surprise them when I'm pregnant.

Effervescence · #4 July 12th, 2009, 11:07 AM

I mentioned it to my Mom. My grandma gave me some jeans this past week. For whatever reason, my grandma things that jeans with elastic in the waste are the best. So she gave me three pairs of elastic-wasted jeans, and one of them was a bit big around the waste. I said "That's okay, I'll wear them when I get pregnant again as in-between pants; they'll be comfy for that." and my mom said "are you telling us something?" So I just grinned and said "We'll find out next week."

My mom's only concerns are that my body won't be ready for another baby. She waiteto d three years between each child.... but that also means that she is an older Mommy. My baby brother, the youngest of our brood, just graduated high school and my mom is way past due for retirement. I know it worked for her, but I don't really want to be having kids well into my 40's, but I do want to have a big family so we are trying to have the siblings close in age. She said she respects and understands that, and gives us her blessing. And then she followed up with "please don't give any details about conceiving." I don't think that's fair, because all of us (her children) know how/where/when each of us was conceived!

Carmoma · #5 July 12th, 2009, 11:17 AM

Funny story. Last night my parents, my dh and I were all walking through Ikea. My parents had no idea we were ttc. We got to the baby section and were just walking through. I had to seriously restrain myself from looking all ga-ga at the cribs and changing tables and such. I whispered to my husband, "Don't let me touch, don't let me touch! So tempted! SOooo tempted to touch!" and my mom spins around and says, "What are you whispering about? Are you pregnant?? You're pregnant aren't you!?!" And of course I started sputtering and blushing and saying I wasn't pregnant. But she noticed me blushing and asked me what was up and I told her we were trying and would find out in about a week.

Admin-pattyandthemoos · #6 July 12th, 2009, 11:25 AM

To answer my question, I don't really talk to my mom about having kids. She is not really supportive of us having a big family but she knows how I am and doesn't try to tell me what to do. She just isn't supportive really. Dh's family is the same way.

#7 July 12th, 2009, 11:38 AM

I don't talk to my mom. About anything.

So I guess the answer is no, and I couldn't care less what she thought about me ttc. She already told me when she discovered I was 20 weeks pregnant with #5 (not that I told her, and this was way back when we were talking) comments like,

"Calgary's having a population boom. It's called my daughter!"

"How COULD I come to visit you? I'm not a **** sheep herder."

"You're an idiot. I always knew your sister was the smarter of the two."

Etc, etc, etc.. then, of course, always the drama queen, "WHY didn't you tell me you were pregnant? Why did I have to hear it from someone else? When were you going to tell me? When he's born?!"

Gee. Wonder why.

DaDaLou · #8 July 12th, 2009, 12:40 PM

Mom changes her mind every time we talk about kids. First she thought I was too young, then she wanted grandbabies, then we weren't strong enough in our marriage, then we had been married too long, blah blah blah. Ugh. My whole family knows we want children. They just don't know whether or not we are actively ttc. My mom is bi-polar so it's hard to know when I can or can't talk with her about it. She had a hard journey too, so it would be nice to talk and get support from her. It's just hard to know when she'll be supportive and when she'll be negative and down.

Coley · #9 July 13th, 2009, 08:24 AM

I talk to my mom about TTC ALL THE TIME!! She is HUGELy supportive with everything. She is full of advice, since she was a charter almost all of her adult life. She has given me a shoulder to cry on when I feel like a failure and she's encouraged me with stories of how she and my dad didn't get me "right away".

She is just WONDERFUL! I couldn't ask for a more supportive, loving, understanding mom. She knows how much I want this and she is doing everything she can to help me get there.

Arya · #10 July 13th, 2009, 10:06 AM

I would give anything if my mom was still here to talk to. Sadly, she passed away last year and life will never be the same again for me

edenonearth · #11 July 13th, 2009, 10:20 AM

I would love to be able to talk to my mom about TTC but she is not the type of mom you can talk to about that stuff. I adore her but.... know what I mean?

tchelle · #12 July 13th, 2009, 11:27 AM

Absolutely not. She still thinks I'm on B/C. When I stepped on a nail and had to go to the doctor a few months ago, she came with me and I even went to the extreme of lying to the doctor saying I was still on B/C because she was there.

She wouldn't disown me or anything, but I think she would think it is highly irresponsible for us to have a child with me still being laid off and not having any health insurance right now. But having said that, we're still probably better off than she and my dad were when they had my brother and I and my BF really can't do any worse than any of my cousins that have kids (I don't think any of them deserve to have kids).

So no, I don't talk to her about it and actually having to tell my parents is one of my biggest pregnancy fears.

~ Christine ~ · #13 July 13th, 2009, 11:47 AM

I told her when we were trying to decide whether we were going to TTC, but now that we decided, we have not told anyone. She'll be excited.

Coley · #14 July 13th, 2009, 09:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arya

I would give anything if my mom was still here to talk to. Sadly, she passed away last year and life will never be the same again for me

I'm so sorry.

Admin-pattyandthemoos · #15 July 14th, 2009, 04:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coley

I talk to my mom about TTC ALL THE TIME!! She is HUGELy supportive with everything. She is full of advice, since she was a charter almost all of her adult life. She has given me a shoulder to cry on when I feel like a failure and she's encouraged me with stories of how she and my dad didn't get me "right away".

She is just WONDERFUL! I couldn't ask for a more supportive, loving, understanding mom. She knows how much I want this and she is doing everything she can to help me get there.

That is so great. I wish my mom was more like that. I hope to be that way for my girls when they get old enough to have babies.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arya

I would give anything if my mom was still here to talk to. Sadly, she passed away last year and life will never be the same again for me

I am so sorry. ((((HUGS)))))