Kind of O/T Vent....(x posted in my TTC#1 journal)

CandaceDianne · #1 August 12th, 2009, 08:14 AM

(this is copied and pasted)

LADIES I AM OFFICIALLY 3 DPO!!!!!

I feel all of those emotions right now. My heart has been pounding since I woke up to temp...I am so thrilled, excited, and nervous. I am more so nervous because of the way DH has been feeling about himself. Not tomake this too long, but he was a Deputy Sheriff up until June and he LOVED his job! An innocent incident happened (that's a long story) that happened when the county was mentioning budget cuts, so they let him go.

Since, my DH has been somewhat unhappy with the way his career is going. He feels like a loser! He is now working at a cabinent shop, where everyone there is missing teeth, has criminal records, uneducated (as in NO GED/High School Diploma) and make rude comments about cops all the time. I am not judging those people, but my DH came from a place where he was respected and was SO proud of his work....to well, the opposite. I get it and I wish there was something I could do. Then yesterday, his new superviser told him they are going to make cuts soon (i.e. temps, which DH is NOT) and hopefully they would be able to keep him on (that's real comforting). Then my DH spoke with our BIL (who helped get him the job) and his supervisor told him the opposite...WTH?. Our BIL told DH the guy just tells people that to keep them motivated, which my DH is!!! Anyway, I didnt mean to ramble, its just a very stressful time for my DH.

I asked him last night if we didn't get a BFP this cycle, if he wanted to wait this out. He basically said No, because there is never a perect time to have a baby and he doesn't even know what to believe at work. Worst case, he could file unemployment until he found something else. Oh, and to top it off, his supervisor promised to give him a certain pay rate. Well, his first check was a dollar short and then his last pay check was 50 cents short...now they came back and told him they can only pay him what his last paycheck rate was and not receive any backpay from the first check. GREAT, real professional.

So, now, I ask myself....what IF he loses his job, again? Would YOU stop TTC if that was a possibility? I feel selfish for continuing to TTC if there is a chance we cannot provide!! I dunno, I am just at a loss. I wish I could help DH's morale, but there is nothing I can do. I tell him how proud of him I am all the time, but I realize its a lot deeper than that for him. Ok, enough 'Whoa is me'.....

Arya · #2 August 12th, 2009, 08:31 AM

THat would be so frustrating for you DH and you. I can kind of relate in a way that my DF's work supervisors are similar in that they try to motivate them by telling them that there are lots of other people who need jobs right now and if they don't work their butts off by working 10 or 11 hour shifts every day there are plenty of other people who will. That makes me so mad! DF gets upset about it but what can he do?

I hope it works out for you guys. On the happier note, so happy that you have finally ovulated and that everything seems good now!

CandaceDianne · #3 August 12th, 2009, 09:39 AM

Thanks Deniela!!

Why cant people manage/supervise like they should, its not right the threaten jobs to motivate people!

I guess wahtever will happen will happen.God ahs always taken care of us, through the good and bad.

kbpeanut · #4 August 12th, 2009, 09:47 AM

Sorry to hear about DH's work situation

I know how stressful that kind of thing can be...I got laid off last October, and wouldn't you know, we had planned to start TTC in Nov (our first anniversary). We did talk a lot about waiting, holding off, etc until I found another job, but decided to just keep with our plan. Fast forward 10 months later...I still haven't found a job, and still not PG...so it's seemingly working out well. But, IMHO, I would keep on TTC. You never know when it's going to happen, and I've become a firm believer in fate...when you get your BFP, it's meant to be...

Coley · #5 August 12th, 2009, 09:58 AM

That sucks! I'm so sorry your DH has to deal with this. Unfortunately, whenever we find ourselves in an economic downturn there are always people who will use it to take advantage of others and to try to turn their employees into indentured servants. Sadly, they know what the job market is right now and they know that most people know that they cannot simply up and quit and find a better job around the corner, ya know?

I agree with DH there is no perfect time to have a baby. If you wait for the perfect time, you'll be waiting your whole life. Trust me... I spent 7 1/2 years of my life waiting for the perfect time with the wrong man... and now that I've found the right man, there are times when I wonder if it will ever happen. So yeah... keep TTC, when you get that BFP no matter the work situation, you'll find a way.

It's awful and it sucks, but I hope that he can stick it out until a better opportunity comes along. I know it's got to be difficult for him going from a position of authority to just another Joe... but try to remember if God brings you to it... he will bring you through it.

CandaceDianne · #6 August 12th, 2009, 11:29 AM

Thanks everyone!! That truly does make me feel better!! You have no idea!

A guy at work, who is in the military, is speaking with some friends at a local air base here. So we will see what comes from that, plus there is always enlisting in the military. I just hope I am strong enough if it comes to that.

Thanks so much!!!!

Admin-pattyandthemoos · #7 August 13th, 2009, 04:33 AM

I agree with the other ladies. You don't know what is going to happen and where you will be in a few months. If something should happen you can worry about that then.

I have been in stinky jobs like that before so I hope your dh can get in a position where he can look for a new job. I just don't get the feeling that he is going to eventually be happy with this one. ((((HUGS)))