[OnesOnTheWay]

So, I just realized that this month will be our first month really trying..
I hate to admit it but we just never DTD anymore. Like last month we got into a huge fight right when I got a positive OPK and the month before I didn't even know when I ovulated so we didn't even DTD.. It's pathetic..I am embarrassed that we do it so little.. I don't know why... I just never have the energy anymore and neither does DH.. we always go to bed at different times....and.. blah blah blah.. BUT I think we're BOTH motivated now....... Let the baby dancing begin!

SOOOOOOO.. I have a good feeling about this month

Edited to add: We stoped protecting in June.. and.. like last month DH asked me "So are you pregnant yet?" and I was like "We have to have SEX to get pregnant.. having sex once a month won't cut it" LOL He was like "Oh."

[AngelM82]

You sound EXACTLY like us!! I was pretty bitter there for a while because we stopped "preventing" in June also but rarely every BDed either and then DH would also ask questions about me being pregnant yet and I would get upset and say, "Um how do you expect I would have concieved, imaculate conception?!"

But we have started getting better. Not just with the TTC piece of it, we're just trying to make more time for each other ya know.. That way it also doesnt have to make the BDing feel like its only for a specific reason. I wanted for our "starting to try" to actually help us reconnect in general, it can help us make a baby but also just feel closer. We still go through little stints where we don't seem to but its getting more frequent, it used to feel like over a month at a time in between which I agree, does feel embarassing somehow...

Good luck in your journey!!

[crazybabybrain]

Don't feel embarrassed, I think that is a situation that a lot of us can relate to. With work, and stress, and life, sometimes it just seems like another thing to do! Before we were trying, it was the same story for us. Good luck this month!

[Admin-pattyandthemoos]

You know dh and I went through a spell in our marriage where we weren't having a lot of sex. One thing I have learned is that you can get out of practice with it and then you don't like it as much. The more you do it the more you want to. We try to do it at least a couple times a week even if we don't really feel like it.

When we first started ttc dh and I would have fights because he didn't want to do it when I needed him to. I would go to bed crying sometimes or if he would finally cave and say he would I didn't want to because who wants to bd with someone that is being forced to. But, now that we have been at this a while he gets it now. Before, I don't think he understood how important timing was and I also think he was still having mixed feelings about having another baby. Now that he has had some time he is ready for another baby and we bd a lot now.

I would just start trying to bd at least 2 or 3 times a week throughout your whole cycle and I bet you will get pregnant.

[AngelM82]

That is so true! The less often we would do it, it seemed like it seemed harder to bring ourselves to. Not that we arent attracted to each other but we just sort of didnt need or want to that often and then it would almost feel akward initiating it after a long period of time.. lol, I would almost feel like a shy teenager! But we do that same thing now, try to initiate having sex a couple of times a month even when it isn't our "have to" period of time for the month. That way we can feel like we have a sex life for ourselves and it isnt just a job.

Also Patty, we came across the same situation you mentioned. He would get mad at me if I would want him to have sex because if he was tired or whatever else, he felt like he had to and didnt like that. And me, I would cry because we could be losing our chance plus I felt hurt because I figured, what guy would turn down sex with his wife?! So then he would do it but I felt like he would be resentful so then I would be more upset and not want to do it. We would end up doing it usually but those nights felt a little strained which is so not fun. Luckily we don't have that much of an issue now, DH is definately more aware of everything now so is more into all of this. And I think because we had a period of time where it was like that, it is what made us have to talk about it and be more aware of eachother in general so we try to have more time for us, whether it be having sex or just cuddling or whatever.