[azura24]

Well, me and my fiance have been ttc for about 4 months and if I am completely honest HE has been trying for about a year or so. I kinda was a little nervous in the beginning and would conveniently miss my O days and then...... he got smart and started calculating and going online a reading up lolol. Now that I look at it, I really dont know what I was so nervous about lol. I have a beautiful 4 (going to be 5 on thursday!!!!!) year old, she is super smart and intrigued by EVERYTHING, I love kids, I want a big family, but I didnt think it was really time. Well I have decided, NOW is the time! lol. So we have been having relations (lol) every other day. I dont really know how to chart and everything because "AF" comes always in the beginning of the month but never the same day. -frustrating- So every month I over analyze all my symptoms, until this month I kinda said blah blah blah forget it! Well today "AF" is supposed to be here and no sign. I usually start no later than the 7th. We will see but my nips are really sensitive and i feel so bloated -yuck- but again I dont know. I dont wanna take a test cuz I kinda feel disappointed when it comes out negative. So I guess I'll wait. I really dont get it because, with my lovely Lil Miss Mia-Elise, it was sooo easy to get pregnant. She wasnt planned but wasnt unplanned either, I just said if it happens it happens, kinda wish I had that attitude now. Its kinda sad, because one of my friends' is pregnant (actually 2 were) and she is so confused and is making lil comments like, "I dont want it, I think I will get an A!" The other girl I know, she has has so many that this last time she decided to keep it, she had a miscarriage! I dont know I guess I just get a lil jealous. I want a baby and am ready and the 2 people I know are ready to give em' up! Well whatever I will update on tuesday more than likely. Have a good day to anyone that reads this!

[azura24]

Well today has been a weird kinda day. I am at work right now. yesterday I went to the bathroom number 2 about 6 times, i dont know what all that was about, but when I was pregnant with mia the same thing happened. So.... I dont want to jump to any conclusions but yeah. Then today I woke up and I was sooo nausiated. Not only that but I was supposed to start AF yesterday. Nothing. Now I have a lot of cramping on my left side. I dont know what that means but we will see in the next few days I guess.

[tinkerbell5050]

good luck amber, hope af stays away x

[azura24]

oooookkkkk....today still no sign of AF. The cramping continued til I got off work last night around midnight. Today no cramping just yucky feeling in the belly and really emotional. I have alot of discharge, which is really weird for me cuz rarely do I ever get close to the amount I have right now. I still have yet to take any form of test. I guess after so many negatives Im pretty scared to take another test just to get disappointed again. I told myself I wouldnt take one until I threw up from morning sickness lol. I have been going to the bathroom app. every 20 minutes or so #1 (which is better than yesterday I should admit). Tomorrow is Mia's birthday, Im sooo excited, we are giving her a lil b-day party at the house on friday and tomorrow I have some balloons and a lil babydoll I am going to set up for her before she wakes up lol. Shes super excited for tomorrow lol, i guess i cant wait either. Well talk tomorrow! Have a great day!!

[azura24]

wow...its been a while since i have been on here writing...i guess its about time i do write something down to help get control of my emotions. DF and i are still trying for a baby, hopefully this is our month. After the m/c last month it really made me all messed up. Doc said it was ok to start ttc after my 1st af so we did and now im here waiting. I have really sore nips that are a kinda white color and i had some nausea yesterday but nothing much going on...super hungry. But then again i have been only eating ramen noodles lol. Really sleepy all the time but i will blame that on something else just so i dont get my hopes too high. I should probably be testing tomorrow, maybe i will get a BFP! I think I o the day after or the day af stops because i get an extreme amount of ewcm that is really really stretchy and i remembered that is when i concieved my daughter so i am hoping that is it and i caught the eggie!! we will see!! anyways i will keep everyone posted and that is all i have to say about that lol...everyone have a great day!

[azura24]

<span style="color:#00BFFF">Well, today is today...a little frustrated. I still have yet to start my period, no sign of it. My cervix has stayed high and medium and i have off and on had pg symptoms but no concrete symptoms. I keep telling myself that I'm not, hoping (not really hoping) that maybe if AF is supposed to be here she would come and nothing. Then I say, well what if I am pregnant and I just dont know it? I have taken about 4 hpt's and BFN but really to me it doesnt matter. When I was preggo with Mia I took a bunch and they all came out negative. When I found out i was preggo I was at the er when they ran blood and told me then at my next check up 3 days later, they told me that I wasnt (they did a urine test) and made me go home well when I got home they called me back in because they looked at my blood tests (they should have did that to begin with). Anyways so I'm trying sooo hard to stay positive and not trick myself into anything. Then again I am thinking what if the doctor did a qualitative hcg instead of a quantitive hcg test? That could be very interesting and I could very well be pregnant! Man I just wish I knew some answers!!!! Anyways, Mia graduated to kindergarten and I'm very excited but also very emotional! I just thought I would be pregnant by this time!! My best friend Melissa is starting to show it's so cute lol. Today I was pushing baby matt-her 1yo- in the stroller and she was like "aww you look cute pushing a stroller" I said thanks and laughed it off but I really felt like crap cuz it was my stroller she was using and I felt like my baby should have been in it. Oh well I guess it doesnt really matter....whatever happens is going to very well happen so I guess I have to just deal with it. Ugh........ </span>