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Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
December 10th, 2008, 11:28 AM
LisaB's Avatar Mom to twins + 1
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Carmel, CA
Posts: 5,872
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So there is a new study out:

High levels of psychologic distress in infertile couples

I mean, did they really need to waste money on this study?

(to read the synopsis, you can use my un/pw: lisachu, fertility)

DH & I tried to go to counseling after our 3rd m/c I think. But, the guy was a little fruity, and we only went once. (He actually said to me, "Take a deep breath... picture the air going through your Fallopian tubes to your uterus...") DH & I could not stop laughing after we left. Plus, he kept comparing my pain to the pain his wife went through when she found out she had cancer. He said his wife handled HER pain so well, and was so cheerful and gracious up until the end. The implication as I took it, that I had no right to be depressed & should be handling this better, since there are much worse things in life. I felt about an inch high. I couldn't even be depressed right! Let alone start a family. Oh boy.
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Me: Lisa, Mommy to twins +1
8/5/08 Beautiful twin girls Leigh and Lucy born after 4-year struggle with RPL & 6 losses
12/10/09 Surprise! Baby #3 is on the way, EDD 6/22/10

12/29/09 2nd ultrasound - joining team blue

6/16/10 Baby Ben is born!


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  #2  
December 10th, 2008, 06:53 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
Lisa- I had to giggle at your byline of "duh" for this article, you are so right! As a therapist I feel the need to apologize for a person in my field saying what he said to you. It is actually NOT good practice for a therapist to use their life experiences and compare them to their pateint's so the fact that he even brought up his wife's pain was questionable...then to go on about HER handeling it well...well he's an idiot. If he had to say anything at all or was trying to convey empathy maybe just talking about loss or grief over health could have been a better way to put it. Whatever the case, it's no wonder you didn't return. There are a lot of QUIRKY people in the field of psychotherapy, it can be hard to find a good one. I try and tell people it may take seeing a few bad eggs before coming out with a good one. Thanks for sharing and including this article!
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  #3  
December 11th, 2008, 06:57 AM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 12,330
I don't have time to take a look right now - but I will later. I agree with Norina - what a dink! If you needed someone to tell you to cheer & quit whining you could have asked the countless other people in your life that weren't supporting you through your struggle & gotten just as good of advice. Why was he asking you to envision air going through???? I would have giggled too - all it makes me imagine (I think I have a dirty mind) is when air gets in there (when you are having sex) and makes some uncomfortable noises & that is not a desirable thing to envision for me....
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We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
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  #4  
December 11th, 2008, 12:19 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,315
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LOL at Beckie's queef comment.

but that's a sort of waste of money study. it's a given, if you're trying for something and it's not happening it's logical you're going to stress.

That's like saying "stress levels high among the unemployed"
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  #5  
December 11th, 2008, 04:40 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 835
Your title says it all - duh!

Beckie - LOL!
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m/c - 10/8/07 (6w4d)
m/c - 2/27/08 (11w5d)
m/c - 6/20/08 (7w2d)
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