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Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
July 12th, 2010, 08:10 AM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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Do you ever find yourself looking at a random parent (who may just be having a bad day) and thinking "Why can YOU have a kid but I can't?"
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  #2  
July 12th, 2010, 01:31 PM
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Yes! All the time.
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  #3  
July 12th, 2010, 08:05 PM
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Yep. That happens to me ALOT of the time.
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  #4  
July 13th, 2010, 01:07 PM
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I remember feeling like that and feeling so bitter and hurt that it felt like everybody could get pg and carry a baby to term and I couldn't. Things changed for me when I had Makenna and realized that people were probably thinking that about me when they saw us out in public and I was causing somebody pain because I had a baby, but they don't know my story or what I went through to have her.

It made me realize everybody has a story and things aren't always as they appear. Now I go around wondering if people struggled or had RPL, it's an odd way to think now.
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  #5  
July 13th, 2010, 08:28 PM
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I still do it and I had my miracles. Girl down from my mom has had 5 kids and has none of them. She and I were pregnant at the same time last year she had a normal pregnancy with no complications, I had a ton of complications and her son was born addicted to crack and I had to have a tubal because of my complications. It makes me so angry, I really wanted 6 children but I can't have any more it could kill me and here these people having them. I suffered 12 losses, the DD of my first loss just passed July 5.
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  #6  
July 14th, 2010, 08:43 AM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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Nykoal, that's a good way to look at it.

ftnjn (sorry, I don't know your name), I know that feeling. I haven't had a tubal or as many losses but my stepsister has four and doesn't have custody of any of them. My niece was born addicted to percocet and my brother has NINE and only has/supports one of them. I'm sorry that you're on this journey and that you had to have your tubes tied last time.
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  #7  
July 14th, 2010, 08:53 PM
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Oh dear god yes, although it is more "Why can you pop them out so easy just to **** them up when I have to fight and struggle just to have one just survive?"

I see bad parents being bad parents with just a trail of LOs following them and think how ****** up it is.

I have had to deliberately block out the years I spent doing foster care work.
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  #8  
July 15th, 2010, 07:26 AM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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I don't think I have the emotional capability for social work/foster care at this point. The heart yes, but I don't think I can handle the heartache.
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  #9  
July 16th, 2010, 05:57 AM
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I do all the time as well. I have a neighbour who let her 2 year old out in the streets while she napped on the couch. Police came to my door looking for his mum. They said they had found him 7 streets over. Of course I told them where she lived, but I was SO MAD!! I see stuff like this all the time and it makes me mad. I am sure I wouldn't be a perfect parent, but I would certainly be better than that.


Another thing that bugs me is women who have like 7 kids and complain about it! No one MADE them have 7 kids! I would die for just one, and they have the gall to complain around me. GRRRR! Sorry, this topic really strikes a nerve for me.
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