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Thoughts on Becoming a Mother


Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
July 20th, 2010, 02:11 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Illinois
Posts: 1,560
Thoughts on Becoming a Mother
There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children, I know that I will be better.
I will be better not because of genetics, or money or that I have read more books,
but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.
I have longed and waited. I have cried and prayed.
I have endured and planned over and over again.
Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.
I will notice everything about my child.
I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.
I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me.
I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see.
Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love.
I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend and sister because I have known pain.
I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body, I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.
I have prevailed.
I have succeeded.
I have won.
So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.
I listen.
And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely. I have learned the immerse power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.
I have learned to appreciate life.
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  #2  
July 20th, 2010, 04:53 PM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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I love this. Thank you for posting this on here.
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Proud former foster parent to a teen. Waiting on our next call. Proud Aunt to 22.
Proud mommy to 7 angels. Survivor of 4 failed adoptions (5 kids)
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  #3  
July 20th, 2010, 06:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Illinois
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No problem!!! I found a website with a bunch of different things---I will post something new periodically.
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  #4  
July 20th, 2010, 06:24 PM
Soleil's Avatar Happy & Blessed
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So, so beautiful. An exactly what I needed to read tonight. Thank you.
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  #5  
July 20th, 2010, 06:53 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 18,680
That's soooooo true! I'm a better Mother after going through what I've been through and don't for once take it for granted. I've got a new sense of understanding and see things through different eyes now. This goes for anybody going through any type of loss or struggle. It's like once you experience the heartache that comes with RPL and infertility you grasp a better understand of what it is to loss a dream and the fear and pain that it brings. No matter what others are going through the feelings are the same and something we can now better understand and relate to.

Don't ever lose hope ladies!!! Miracles can and do happen. I struggled with infertility for 7yrs before suffering 3 losses in a 9 month span before having Makenna and Maddie (only to have another loss recently).
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  #6  
July 20th, 2010, 10:07 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,842
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nykoal View Post
Don't ever lose hope ladies!!! Miracles can and do happen. I struggled with infertility for 7yrs before suffering 3 losses in a 9 month span before having Makenna and Maddie (only to have another loss recently).


I needed 3 years, 6 types of fertility drugs, and 2 artificial inseminations to conceive 2 pregnancies. Three of the 4 babies did not survive. It took intensive high risk prenatal care, but one of my children lived and it is worth it. There is a reason they call them rainbow babies.
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  #7  
July 22nd, 2010, 10:32 AM
ambee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 5,740
Love, love, love this. I know I will never take a second with my little rainbow baby for granted. Ever.

I agree with Nykoal, keep up the hope ladies. Against all of the odds, miracles can and do happen. You are all some of the most amazing women I know.
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