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How is this fair?


Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
September 4th, 2010, 08:07 AM
hollann1984's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Over the past year that we have been ttc, about 12 different people on my facebook have annoucned their pregnancy. All of them have put a post on facebook about it within days of actually finding out they are pregnant. I know with both of my pregnancies i was not planning on telling anyone at all till after 12 weeks, especially the second one since i m/c the first. This might be mean of me and im sorry if i am, but i dont see how its fair that they put it all out there and we get stuck with nothing. I dont wish what has happend to me on anyone ever but im just going through a "why me" days.
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  #2  
September 4th, 2010, 09:30 AM
Lex&angels's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have days like that too
I think it's normal.
And statistically, if they're all announcing it early, it will bite at least a few of them hard when they have to let everyone they've ever met know about a miscarriage. Letting everyone know is something I'm not brave enough for yet, so I think it's very unwise of them unless they are prepared for the idea.
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  #3  
September 4th, 2010, 10:34 AM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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*hugs* With my latest loss, we did start telling people right away (we hadn't with the first three). My reasoning was that I am very open about what we've been through and decided that I didn't want to rob our families of whatever time they may get with the little one/knowing about their existence. I haven't decided what we'll do next time.

It does bother me though when people announce it and don't even stop to think about what could happen.
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  #4  
September 4th, 2010, 12:42 PM
Lex&angels's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Augie View Post
*hugs* With my latest loss, we did start telling people right away (we hadn't with the first three). My reasoning was that I am very open about what we've been through and decided that I didn't want to rob our families of whatever time they may get with the little one/knowing about their existence. I haven't decided what we'll do next time.

It does bother me though when people announce it and don't even stop to think about what could happen.
I agree - I announce it immediately to family and close friends for that very reason. But not to facebook (I'm not brave enough for that yet)
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  #5  
September 4th, 2010, 12:53 PM
MommytoaMiracle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm sorry you are having "one of those days", hun!
I know, it is SO hard to see people get pregnant, day after day on FB.
I usualy "hide" the pregnant gals

I hope your day gets better!
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  #6  
September 4th, 2010, 01:30 PM
hollann1984's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mommyto4AngelBabies View Post


I'm sorry you are having "one of those days", hun!
I know, it is SO hard to see people get pregnant, day after day on FB.
I usualy "hide" the pregnant gals

I hope your day gets better!
i think im going to have to start doing that
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  #7  
September 5th, 2010, 12:27 PM
ambee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It's not fair. Even now, after a rainbow baby, I still feel myself getting a little pissy that so many people seem to be able to just think about getting pregnant, and it's done with zero complications. I will never understand why it's so hard for women I know would be great mothers, and so easy for those who really don't seem to want or care for their children. One of the great mysteries of life I guess!

Big hugs sweetie.
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  #8  
September 5th, 2010, 04:43 PM
JessP's Avatar Lovin life and family
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That is totally normal. It made me cry especially right after our losses and right about the time they are due all the births. Knowing I should be announcing ours. With our first loss we told everyone. He was our third child. I had no reason not to. My other two were fine. At 13 weeks we bought diapers, car seat etc. I had no reason to think something was wrong we had a heartbeat. Everyone knew. 2 Weeks later we had to tell everyone what had happened. No matter what it wouldn't have changed waiting until 12 weeks or not. I miss that blissful ignorance. The "it won't happen to me". Sorry you are having a rough patch. I hope your day got better. I have thought about hiding the pregnant people .
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