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Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  • 1 Post By Lex&angels

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  #1  
February 21st, 2012, 08:06 AM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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If you knew there was no chance of you having your rainbow, would you adopt?
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  #2  
February 21st, 2012, 11:21 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Most likely not. I want a baby. As in cries all night, wants to feed every 10 minutes baby. The wait list for that is so extensive that we'd never get the baby before our "bring home baby" limit is gone. DH isn't willing to take on a child that we haven't raised from little person hood either.

If we get no rainbow, I make do with Reme. He's a good substitute at least.


He has said he'd consider a surrogate though, so even though we may not get a biological child, we could at least have one from babyhood.
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  #3  
February 21st, 2012, 01:01 PM
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i have one allready, so if i couldnt have another one i would deff think about adoption just to give audie a brother or sister .
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  #4  
February 21st, 2012, 03:09 PM
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My husband and I have always been open to adoption. We will probably adopt whether we have another one of our own or not.
I was adopted and I think it's a wonderful thing!
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  #5  
February 21st, 2012, 05:42 PM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
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Ash, it's perfectly possible to get a baby.

DH and I plan on adopting no matter what. Starting my next cycle, we will NTNP and then will go on with the foster classes as soon as they start back up.
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  #6  
February 21st, 2012, 07:27 PM
Halloween81's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have always been open to adopting a baby but DH is not so sure. I still haven't quite figured out why but I believe he worries about the child leaving us for their biological family when they get older (ridiculous, I know).
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Kimberly, wife to Jamie
Miscarriage at 10 weeks - February 14, 2009
Miscarriage of twin boys at 11 weeks - September 21, 2009
Chemical pregnancy - January 9, 2010
Miscarriage at 10 weeks - April 21, 2010
Miscarriage at 7 weeks - October 22, 2010
Miscarriage at 10 weeks - May 14, 2011
Miscarriage at 17 weeks - December 7, 2011 (My sweet little Joshua had Achondrogenesis type 2)
Miscarriage at 5 weeks - June 5, 2013

All test results normal. Reason for RPL unknown.

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  #7  
February 21st, 2012, 08:09 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Augie View Post
Ash, it's perfectly possible to get a baby.

DH and I plan on adopting no matter what. Starting my next cycle, we will NTNP and then will go on with the foster classes as soon as they start back up.
Except we have a 5 year limit. No ttc for 1 of those years for sure... so we'd have to ttc for a bit to see if we were getting a rainbow or not.. and then if not... we'd have 2 years. I can't see them matching us with an infant in two years... we don't have kind of luck. lol.

There's also the fact dh isn't like me, and wouldn't consider a child with needs. Not with Reme already have some of his own. He'll take a risk on a biological child, but not one that we'd adopt.
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Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
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Cycle 2: Clomid cd 3-7 ~ beta negative (< 3)
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  #8  
February 22nd, 2012, 12:48 AM
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I would absolutely adopt. It was our plan all along to adopt if TTC w/medical assistance didn't work.
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  #9  
February 23rd, 2012, 05:53 PM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
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I am pretty sure I am going to sound selfish, but I really want to be honest. Before our losses, I wasn't sold on the prospect of getting pregnant. I had gone through one oopsie loss and I hated every day I was pregnant. I begged my husband for years to just plan for adoption. I didn't want to go through a pregnancy. It took him a lot to convince me to TTC. When we lost more babies TTC the desire to adopt just got heightened. I had absolutely no desire to TTC and get pregnant. I didn't want to get stretch marks. I hate the way I look and I wasn't keen on passing my genetics on. It really wasn't important to me. I didn't want to chance getting fat and not being able to loose the weight. Most things that were shallow and self centered. It was important to DH to have one biological child if we could.

Honestly, I am glad that I carried and birthed Marsi myself. I accept my stretch marks. But, I would choose to adopt the rest of my children if I had the money and time. I love the miracle of pregnancy but absolutely abhor being pregnant. I know that I will probably get pregnant again this year because we don't want to wait that long between children.

So, that is a long answer. Yes, I would definitely adopt and have been trying to convince my husband of this for several years.
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  #10  
February 26th, 2012, 07:48 PM
Happy Song's Avatar Nicole
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Halloween81 View Post
I have always been open to adopting a baby but DH is not so sure. I still haven't quite figured out why but I believe he worries about the child leaving us for their biological family when they get older (ridiculous, I know).
Actually this is not ridiculous. I know that I adopted mine when they were older, one left his mom at 18 months old and they both have this fixation that their biological parents would have been a great life. Which is unrealistic as they were both adopted from teh Foster Care Sysytem and their parents were in prison.

I adopted and had I known then what i know now I would have never done it.

I suffered infertility for 10 years before I got pregnant with my "infertility is not a good back up for the pill" baby. Once she was born I knew the difference and hated it.

After she was born it took me 7 years to get my second baby and after her I had three losses nad two rainbow babies.

So if I were to right a letter to me at 16/18or 21 I'd say be patient that my babies would come when they were ready and not to stress it. But again that is knowing how the story ends.

So Alex my final answer is no and I would also huighly recommend NOT adopting older children and having them as foster parents because as a foster parent you get tons of support and when you adopt you are on your own.
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  #11  
February 27th, 2012, 04:03 AM
Lex&angels's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I would absolutely adopt. We're in the process right now We wouldn't get a newborn, but we have a good chance of having a 2-3 month old child.
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  #12  
March 30th, 2012, 02:25 PM
*JenJen*'s Avatar impatiently waiting
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We hope to adopt whether we get a biological child or not.
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  #13  
April 3rd, 2012, 08:34 AM
IneedCoffee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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We are looking into the option now that we know we cannot have more children. We want Meg to have a sibling.
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