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Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
September 3rd, 2006, 02:39 AM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 12,330
I am so sorry for your recent loss & for all of your losses. I know your loss is recent & want you to share as much/little as you feel comfortable right now. We have all been there & we all understand. You are not going to find a better group of women to support & love you through such a difficult time. I am sorry that you have a reason to join us - but if you are having to deal with so much saddness, there is no better place for it. I hope you find love, support, healing & understanding here.

Sending you much love-
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We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet




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  #2  
September 3rd, 2006, 08:49 PM
srs srs is offline
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I'm glad you found us, although I'm always sorry that any of us have to be here.
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  #3  
September 3rd, 2006, 08:56 PM
DawnN's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: IL
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Thank you for your welcome. I shared a little bit on the other post for newbies.

I've been diagnosed with PCOS and hypothyroidism. After 13 years of infertility, I was treated with Metformin in July of 2003, for the pcos. We conceived within 3 months...but I didn't know I was pregnant. I had a little bit of spotting before my now regulated cycle was due, so I called my gyn's office and told him. Just a little background...he wasn't the one who put me on the Metformin. My endocrinologist was. In fact, he was confused why I would be on it seeing as how I didn't have diabetes. That should've been my clue to find another doctor.

Well, anyways, he didn't check me for pregnancy. I never thought to ask..I mean, after 13 years...and I'd never heard of implantation spotting. So he put me on bcp's to "straighten me out". He said I should go on them for 2-3 months. I immediately started to bleed real heavy. I called his office several times and kept getting the message back from the nurse to stay on the pill. That it would eventually regulate me.

The third week in, I was bleeding so bad that I was going through over 20 overnight pads a day. I could no longer wear tampons (sorry tmi) because something up there "hurt"....probably my dialating cervix. During that week, I called his office again and got the same response. Then on a Nov. 26th, I started having severe cramping. I told my dh (who was sleeping), that I would need to go to the ER if it got worse. Something was seriously wrong. Within the hour, I passed a huge fleshy clot that filled both my hands. I just "knew" that I had m/c'd a baby. I called the doctor's office the next day, but only got the same response from the nurse.

If it weren't for my insurance co. having a nurse's hotline, I'd have probably hemorraged to death. I ended up in the ER...a week later and had to have an emergency dnc. They said that my blood pressure was so high that it was probably what saved me. My heart was working overtime to pump enough blood to replenish the unbelievable amount that I was losing. During the dnc, the doctor did a hysteroscopy and when I came to, he said that my cervix was completely dialated and my uterus was enlarged and relaxed like someone who was, or who had recently been pregnant! Well...duh...needless to say, I found another dr.

Wow! This has become quite a novel. I'm so sorry. But maybe...somehow....this will help someone else out there.

July of 2004, we found ourselves pregnant again...after a round of clomid cd 3-7 and the Metformin combo. Because he didn't know the effects of metformin on a pregnancy he told me to get off of it when I got pregnant. Around cd 40 I tested (I hated bfn's lol). It was about a week later that I got off the metformin. Within 48 hours I started bleeding.

We got to see that little one on the u/s...his heart just beating away. I lost him 45 minutes after the u/s, in the ER. He was 7 weeks and 2 days along. DH and I were devastated!! That was July 15th, 2004. I ended up having to have another dnc for hemorraging.

Two months later, we started ttc again (armed with the new knowledge about NEVER EVER EVER to go off of Metformin again). Again did the cd 3-7 clomid. We got pregnant the 2nd month of trying. My sweet Sarah is our miracle baby who was born on June 24th, 2005....a month and a half before our 15th wedding anniversary.

I bf her until 9 months. My cycles were wacky..we weren't ttc yet, but were thinking about it. So I started charting. My cycles were running like 40+ days. I knew when I had ovulated because of the temps, but didn't think I was pregnant because of timing .

Well I was. I had a very short LP...temp dropped on 9 or 10 dpo (very short for me). So I thought it was my period. 9 days later and having a strange period...I was so nauseous that I took a pg. test. BFP! But I knew it was bad. I went to the ER to find that my betas were only 88. Two days later, 49. A week later, 7. We had lost another babyduring that crazy "cycle"...that was the beginning of April this year. We believe it was a girl as girl-spermies live longer.

After waiting a cycle, we decided to try again. The doctor gave me a prescription for clomid cd 3-7 and for progesterone (for once I found out I was pg.) We got pg. our 2nd month ttc. Again we were elated!!! Around 6 weeks, I started spotting. I freaked!!! I went and got an u/s done and betas and progesterone checked. The u/s showed only a small gest. sac. Betas were about 9, 300 and something. But my progesterone was dangerously low. Only 9.5. My progesterone suppositories were upped to 2x a day. I got rechecked two days later. The sac was a little larger and it had something that looked a little cloudy in it. My betas were about 14,000. But my progesterone had only gone up to 11.4. So I was upped to 3x a day. An u/s two days later showed a clear gestational sac and now a yolk sac...but what looked like a fetal pole beginning. They said I was only measuring about 5 1/2 weeks. I should've been closer to 7 weeks by then. So they had me come in 10 days later. I then measured 6 1/2 to 7 weeks (when I should've been 8...but I was coming to grips with the fact that somehow timing must've been off..somehow). They had me come in 10 days after that.....the gestational sac and yolk sac had only grown by 1-2 mm. There was no hb. I was 10 weeks pg.

We stopped the prog. suppositories as I was now being deemed "waiting to miscarry". They gave me the option for a dnc, but I didn't want further scarring. I'd had two dnc's and a dne (from two of the m/c's and from uterine polyps years before). We decided to wait it out. I started spotting after missing 3 doses.

By Sunday night, August 27th, 2006, I was having contrax. Just like I did with my dd when I was delivering her. It was pretty intense. I passed our little Teddy around midnight. There wasn't as many blood clots as with any of my other m/c's, but there was a lot more tissue.

Because I was further along than any other m/c I had experienced previously, we decided to cremate our baby. We had our son (we believe it was a boy), Theodore David, cremated this past Wednesday and just received his ashes back in a small wooden box/urn on Saturday.

I miss him so much! I think I am still in shock. I have waves of grief where I just sob...but then I have times where I just feel so numb.

I have an appt. on Wednesday to see a fertility specialist to find out why we are miscarrying. Please pray for me.

If you have read through this long book....thank you for taking the time to listen. I can't believe how much I shared. But it felt good to get all of that out.
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Married 8/11/90 ~ Terry Bechor m/c'd 11/26/03, Thomas A. III m/c'd 7/15/04,
Sarah E. born 6/24/05, Tabitha Zipporah m/c'd 4/?/06, Theodore David m/c'd 8/27/06,
Taylor Lynn m/c'd 2/07/07, Benjamin E. born 3/25/08, Catherine A. born 6/03/09


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  #4  
September 3rd, 2006, 09:01 PM
srs srs is offline
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
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Dawn,
I'm glad you were able to share. What a horrible nightmare this has been for you. I hope you get some answers.
Sara
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  #5  
September 3rd, 2006, 09:09 PM
sweetpea13's Avatar Veteran
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Location: Wichita,Ks
Posts: 127
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Dawn~i am so sorry for all the losses you are experiencing.hopefully your dr can find some answers for you.God Bless,Lisa
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  #6  
September 3rd, 2006, 11:03 PM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 12,330
Dawn - thank you so much for opening up & sharing your story. I am so sorry for all the pain you have been through & the misinformation you have received from the medical community. It is so sad how often I hear stories where Dr's could have done so much more. I applaud you opening up & again - I am so sorry for your losses. I hope you find lots of support & love here. I don't know how many boards you have checked out ehre at JM - but I also want to be sure you know there is a PCOS board & the ladies there are full of info & support as well, if you haven't checked out that board yet as well. I send you much love-
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B - Crazy momma to my two boys
We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet




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  #7  
September 4th, 2006, 11:38 AM
Mari13007's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Maryland
Posts: 3,468
I am so sorry for your losses and you will be in my thoughts and prayers. God Bless.
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  #8  
September 5th, 2006, 10:05 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 10,732
Thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry for all of your losses. I'm glad you found JM and hope that we can bring you friendship and support.
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  #9  
September 5th, 2006, 10:31 AM
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I'm so sorry hun for your losses and the struggles that you've had to go through. Thank you for sharing your story and welcome to our little corner.
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  #10  
September 5th, 2006, 04:31 PM
StephLS's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 653
Thanks for sharing with us Dawn. You've definitely been through the ringer and then some. Hopefully you'll be able to take some comfort in the fact that you are not alone. Everyone here is really supportive in our times of need!
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  #11  
September 5th, 2006, 09:30 PM
DawnN's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: IL
Posts: 4,517
Thank you for all of your replies.

I have my appointment with a fertility specialist tomorrow. Hopefully we'll be able to determine what is causing the miscarriages.
__________________
Married 8/11/90 ~ Terry Bechor m/c'd 11/26/03, Thomas A. III m/c'd 7/15/04,
Sarah E. born 6/24/05, Tabitha Zipporah m/c'd 4/?/06, Theodore David m/c'd 8/27/06,
Taylor Lynn m/c'd 2/07/07, Benjamin E. born 3/25/08, Catherine A. born 6/03/09


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  #12  
September 5th, 2006, 11:42 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
Quote:
Thank you for all of your replies.

I have my appointment with a fertility specialist tomorrow. Hopefully we'll be able to determine what is causing the miscarriages.[/b]
dawn, I read your story through my tears. i am so sorry for all the misinformation, negligence, and heartache you have experienced. I am relieved to know you are going to see a specialist and get some answers. you are very much in my prayers. Please let us know what happens at your appt tomorrow. I will be anxiously awaiting.
I thank you for trusting us with your heart by sharing your story. Icould relate very much to what you said about it feeling good to get it out. I have experienced this same relief by sharing here too.
may tomorrow bring you some peace during this difficult time. Take care.
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  #13  
September 6th, 2006, 10:36 AM
ambee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 5,740
There's not much more that I could say that these wonderful ladies havn't already said. I am so sorry for your losses...I pray that with this appointment you can start to get some answers. to you during this difficult time...
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