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Told my parents...


Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
September 12th, 2006, 06:45 AM
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I finally got around to calling my Mom yesterday and told her about the scar tissue/adhesion and the how the SHG went, and how it was removed. I would have told her sooner but my parent's were really busy last week and had lots of social engagements and I didn't want to call them on their cell phone while they were out with others.

My mom was so excited to hear that the adhesion is gone and I was given a clean bill of health anatomically. I hadn't heard her that excited since I told her I was pg. I didn't think anything of it though and went on with my day. Don't get me wrong...we're excited to know that we most likely found out the cause of the 3rd m/c and we have a good feeling about next Tuesday when we go for our test results, but until we hear the complete results...let's just say we're cautiously optomistic.

Anyhoo...last night my dad called and DH picked up the phone. My dad was gushing and asking DH how he was doing with the good news. DH had a puzzled look in his face and then clued into what my dad was talking about. DH said it was great news and then passed the phone to me after a few more minutes of chit chat. I can't believe how excited my dad was. He was talking a mile a minute about how God was in control and how there were a lot of people all around the world praying for us, and how God had great things in store for us.

Now you need to know something about my dad...he doesn't deal well with "women" issues. He has 3 daughters and cringes when we start "girl" talk around him. Half the time we do it so he'll leave the room! The fact that my dad took the time to call us and he was excited meant a lot to me. I almost started to cry when I hung up the phone (after 25 minutes...my dad's a talker!). Just when I start to feel alone or hopeless somebody pops up and encourages us. I feel so blessed to have out family and friends and it's so nice to have the support of people IRL now, instead of feeling alone and grieving in silence.

I had no idea that so many people were praying for us and from some many different places. It's the little things like this that lift us up. I nearly fell of the couch when my dad asked if we were going to get started on a baby soon! It's bad enough that my dad knows that I have sex (I'm a daddy's girl) but to have him ask that...was soooo unlike him! Dad never ceases to amuse me. Our family isn't pushy about TTC so comments like that are few and far between and funny when they come up.
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  #2  
September 12th, 2006, 08:13 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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LOL!! I love dads. You never know when something's going to touch them so deeply. I'm glad you've got such great support IRL. I know you've been craving that. God does answer prayers, even if it's not in the ways we expect. Sounds like you have a wonderful family and I'm glad they're so excited for you!
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  #3  
September 12th, 2006, 03:43 PM
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nicole your post choked me up! im so happy for you and im real glad your dad called you. i know its the little things like that , that help us along in life and especially at tough times and moments in our life. i cant wait to hear how the rest of your results are, im sure all will be well! good luck sweety
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  #4  
September 12th, 2006, 07:01 PM
srs srs is offline
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Dads can definitely surprise us, that's for sure! It sounds like it was a really great moment for you. It is also good to know that so many people care. I think sometimes we shut people out because it's easier than having the possibility of maybe hearing another insensitive comment, but really sometimes people srprise us.
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  #5  
September 12th, 2006, 07:28 PM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Oh hun I am soooo glad you are getting the extra love & support you need right now from your parents. It can feel very lonely to not be able to share your worries & your good news when it seems like more than others often want to know. I am glad you were able to talk to them & that they responded in such a great way. Thank goodness for moments like this - it's what keeps us going!
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  #6  
September 12th, 2006, 07:35 PM
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Nicole...i am totally crying. My dad sounds very much like your dad...i am also from a family of three girls. My dad is sooo not in tune with women's issues...yet when I lost my third baby, he came to the hospital and hugged me so tight...I buried my head in his chest and cried...we've never had a moment like that...out of everyone (my mom, my sister, my DH) my dad was the one I felt kinda "got it" that day...and he was the least of all people I would have expected that from. Then a few weeks later when my DH asked him for his blessing to marry me my dad told him that he cried for our lost babies and that he wanted to have more grandchildren. just retyping it makes me cry all over again. There's something about dads that can grab us by the heart strings isn't there? i am so happy you have their support...
People are praying for you...I know I am. your father is soo right...God does have immense plans for you! keep that optimism sweetheart. We are all behind you every step of the way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  #7  
September 13th, 2006, 09:06 AM
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Okay...it's a complete "Hallmark" moment now. I've got tears streaming down my face and I can hardly see my screen. I'm still amazed at my dad, and so thankful that he's my dad. I know he gets it because he keeps saying that Nanny & Papa (his parents and my grandparent's) are in heaven and they are with my babies (and his grandbabies).

He once made a comment about how Nanny & Papa are so luckly because they got to see our babies before ever did, but that they're greatly loved here on earth and in heaven. (((Really crying now)))

Family is so important. My middle sister doesn't really get it though. Then again, she's too busy planning her June wedding. My baby sister (who's 19) gets it though. When she heard about the 3rd loss she just cried and said "I love you and Scott so much and hate to see you in so much pain." Then she said that I would be a great mom. She'll be an amazing aunt one day, and I just lvoe that girl to pieces.

It's so true Norina...Dad's have such a power over their daughters and their actions and reactions truly do shape our lives. I can remember when DH called my parent's last Oct to say we were pg but on the way to hospital for surgery because it was EP. My parent's live about 45 min away in another city, but they made record time and got to the hospital just in time to find me while I was being rolled down the hall to surgery.

I'll never forget my dady leaning over me as I was on the stretcher, and seeing him crying these huge tears and saying how proud he was of me, and that we would get through this. (Okay...I'm tearing up again). I remember he had a hard time letting go and my mom had to move the stretcher so she could hug me as well. *I don't know what made me think of that. i hadn't thought about that day in a long time. I guess since the anniversary is coming up next month, my mind is going over the past year.

I'm trying my best to be positive and keep faith that things will work out. It's such a hard lesson to learn and I'm a stuburn student! That song that I learned as a kid still rings true in my head "He's still working on me..."
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