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What's the hardest thing for you right now?


Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
October 10th, 2006, 09:05 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think for me, the hardest thing is waiting for the first EDD. I don't know if it will be a peaceful day or a day of grief or somewhere in between. It's also the day before my dad's birthday and a little over a week before Christmas. I'm trying not to dwell on it or worry about it, but it's always kind of in the back of my mind.

How about you? What is the hardest thing for you right now?
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  #2  
October 10th, 2006, 09:42 AM
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Dealing with the unknown and waiting is hard right now. I've got my 2nd EDD coming up on December 14th and much to my dismay I'm still in the midst of testing. Grrr....I feel like we're wasting time all because a nurse forgot to schedule something the dr wanted done. Oct 31st marks 1 yr ago from my 1st loss and the ectopic surgery that I had. For some reason this has become harder than the EDD this past June.
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  #4  
October 10th, 2006, 12:05 PM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm glad I'm not alone on the date thing.

Nykoal, our EDDs are only 2 days apart. Mine's Dec. 16th. Too bad we don't live closer together. We could go shopping or something.

Cece, that's kind of how I am. It's a date, why is it bugging me so much?
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  #5  
October 10th, 2006, 01:12 PM
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I'm really sad on any of my m/c days... so any 9th or 27th just gets me down. And then there's the due dates =/ I keep thinking "my little boy should be..." and all that. And the girls would still be on their way. So dates are definately hammering into my head.
November 27th will be a year since losing Asher... wow. That one's going to be rough.
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  #6  
October 10th, 2006, 02:31 PM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Goodness, we've got a lot of dates coming up between now and the end of the year.
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  #7  
October 10th, 2006, 04:35 PM
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The fact I will never hold my baby angels ever
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  #8  
October 11th, 2006, 07:30 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That is tough. When that starts to get me down I remember that even though I can't hold them physically, I hold them in my heart every day. I know that's not the same, by any stretch, but it does bring some peace and comfort.
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  #9  
October 11th, 2006, 10:34 AM
Mom2MacyandDru's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think the hardest thing for me is knowing that our ds was alive when he was born but we were not told that and we missed out on some precious time. We did get to hold and love him, but not knowing his heart was still beating- thats tough!!
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  #10  
October 11th, 2006, 10:40 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I can't even imagine how hard that must have been (is) for you.
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  #11  
October 11th, 2006, 10:57 AM
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The hardest thing for me right now is having everyone in my RL pregnant! Ok not everyone but a lot of people...I just want 1 healthy baby...not knowing when I will get him/her is what is bothering me the most currently.
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  #13  
October 11th, 2006, 04:11 PM
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This sunday I'm going to see a family friend who had a baby boy called james (the same name as charlie's father) about 3 months ago now..
And I know I'm going to come away from there and want to curl up in a corner... thats hard right now
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  #14  
October 11th, 2006, 08:17 PM
MrsMandy
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I think what is really bugging me right now is that i just passed my birthday (on the 9th) and when i found out we were finally pregnant i was so happy to realize that i would be huge by my b-day. But here i sit today on what should have just started my 38th week and my due date looming over my head with a completly empty arms and empty heart. God this sucks.
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  #15  
October 12th, 2006, 07:05 AM
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By far the hardest thing is anything where my whole family is involved. My nephew was born exactly one week after Charlie, so it's really difficult to be around him. I love him to death and he's the sweetest little thing but every time I see him, I of course think about what Charlie would be doing and how big Charlie would be. Then of course I start feeling guilty for not wanting to be in the same room with the sweet little thing because I know it's not his fault... I imagine this will always be a huge struggle.

Also, as you all have said... it seems like EVERYONE around me and everyone I see is either pregnant or has a brand new baby. I haven't made it to the point where I compare anyone to this last loss because at this point, obviously the baby wouldn't be born yet (EDD 04/08/07)and I probably wouldn't even be showing but the baby I lost in March was due in August so I see the newborn babies and think that we should have a newborn as well. That's tough...
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<div align="center">



1st Loss~08/14/00-No EDD
03/10/92-My beautiful daughter Kalina's Birthday!
05/12/94-My beautiful daughter Sierra's Birthday!
2nd Loss at 28 weeks~09/12/05 (Charlie's angel day - Trisomy 18)
3rd Loss at 15 weeks~03/04/06-EDD 08/23/06
4th Loss at 9 1/2 weeks~09/12/06-EDD 04/08/07
5th Loss at 9 1/2 weeks~girl 01/14/08-EDD 07/23/08
6th Loss at 19 weeks~10/04/08 (Joey's angel Day - Cord accident)</div>

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