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Forum: Recurrent Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss

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  #2  
October 14th, 2006, 09:50 AM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 12,330
Oh Cece - hun you really need to stop with all the guilt you put on yourself. Your baby passed sweetie & your decision to have a D&C doesn't make it your fault. I relaly think you should seriously consider checking in with a counsellor hun - it makes me sad to hear you still blame yourself. We all blame ourselves at some point, but usually we start to see over time that sometimes babies pass & there is nothing we could have done to save them or no way we could have known. You didn't do anything to cause your mc & somewhere down deep you have to know this. I think if you hadn't been so freaked out initially to be pg, you would have so much guilt now. Whether you were TTC or the baby was an oops - doesn't change anything...what matters is that you loved Jude & you intended to bring him home & love him the same as the babies you have. Those girls in your class were INCREDIBLY insensitive & I am so sory for that. Some people REALLY don't get it & probably never will.

I think with your EDD appraoching you need to be extra kind to yourself sweetie - not ectra critical. It is tough to pass an EDD - I have one coming up too in less than 2 weeks. It's tough - even now, because I know I should be getting ready for maternity leave & we'd be all excited about when he'd actually be showing up, etc. But instead - I am still scared & trying to remain hopeful. You are not alone in your hurting & I hope you know that. I do hope you work on coming to terms with things & letting go of blaming yourself. You deserve to be happy again sweetie & to have some peace. I hope somewhere down deep you know that too. (((hugs)))
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We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
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