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  #1  
December 13th, 2009, 07:47 AM
Formerly LyndaSLP
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 6,379
Hi all. My name is Lynda (29) and DH is Jason (36). We are expecting a baby boy due Dec. 21 (according to doctor). I am really motivated to have a natural childbirth free of pain relief (I'll be receiving antibiotics though because I am GBS+). Everyone (including DH, although he is gradually improving) have been trying to convince me to get an epidural, all except one friend who did things naturally, even with pitocin. My question is, how did you stay motivated to continue without pain relief during labor? I'm worried that when the pain gets overwhelming, I will accept an epidural. I really want to be able to get the full experience of labor and childbirth. I've been practicing breathing techniques, looking into a lot of different positions for labor, and creating a relaxing environment. Anyone have any suggestions?
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Last edited by MommyLynda; December 13th, 2009 at 07:49 AM.
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  #2  
December 13th, 2009, 07:58 AM
DoulaMama's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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dedication is the absolute key! Request that pain meds not be offered by the nurses, and make a code word with your DH if you request them. Also- make a rule that you have to request it between contractions, not durring.

Other then that just stay active, labor upright and work with your body to keep progression happening well. This late in the game that is my best advice.

Also- if you can do it, find a good doula! I've had quite a few clients hire me only hours ( as little as 4 hours before!) or days before their births, so it certainly isn't too late! If you have really good support then it'll be much better for you.
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  #3  
December 13th, 2009, 07:58 AM
Kelllilee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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For me, I had to take the OPTION of pain relief out of the equation. Which is why my last two births have been out of a hospital. It can be very easy to give in during labor. My best suggestion is to not think about it during contractions. Get your support team to wait until a break and not listen to what you are saying in the "heat of the moment". Your support team will be your best way of avoiding the epi. Make sure they understand your desire to go without and encourage you and not ask about it. If YOU bring it up, let them know to wait until after the contraction to discuss it.
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  #4  
December 13th, 2009, 09:01 AM
ChicaChels's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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ditto the doula and ditto a support team. You're REALLY going to need your husband to be supportive, if you plan on having him in there! Practice relaxation between now and then as much as possible. A good practice technique for me was to have my husband hold an ice cube on my temples (you know, the spot on your head just off your forehead) for 60-90 seconds for about 45 minutes one night a week and I really REALLY had to focus to get through that. It's incredibly uncomfortable! It helped me practice relaxation as much as possible though - because the more tense your body is, the more the contraction hurt and the less effective the contraction seems to be. If you have a birth plan, put in bold hot pink letters (Or whatever color, mine are just hot pink ) that you DON'T want anyone to mention pain medication, that you won't to opt out of the routine visit from the anesthesiologist, and if you ask for pain management that everyone involved do the best until you divert the situation. They will know when you're serious if you truly need (and sometimes people do actually NEED epidurals) and when it's time to discuss your options.

it's too bad your GBS + (I was too, it sucks!) cuz then you don't have the option as much of staying home as long as possible. darn bacteria!!!!

good luck and definitely update us after your little man arrives!
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December 9, 2013
5:20PM 8lb3oz 20.5"
Hospital water birth
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  #5  
December 13th, 2009, 09:06 AM
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I will be honest Pitocin contractions are nothing like contractions that natural...

I was on Pitocin and it was the devil... they took me off of it for a couple hours and they lightened up, but I got put right back on Pitocin... The only things that helped me through the pain of Pit contractions was walking, leaning over the bed, sitting on the toliet, and DH rubbing the areas I was having most pain....

The only reason I ended up with an epidural was because I couldnt get my body to relax enough to dilate, I was stuck at 4cm for over 12 hrs and was being threatened with a c-section... thank god I only had the epidural for roughly 2 hours and then Noelle was born... I was amazed how I dilated 6cm so fast after the epidural...

OOOoo.. cool wet washcloths were the bomb too when it came to relieving my pain and concentrating on my breathing.... DH was very helpful
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  #6  
December 13th, 2009, 09:08 AM
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Dedication is key, but also having support. The doula doesn't sound like a bad idea. I'd also tell DH now that if he can't be supportive of your decision that you want him gone. Even if you don't mean it. Just let him know you mean business, and that if he isn't going to be supportive, it's the same as being against you, and you don't need anyone against you during labor.

I tried to stay very focused on my end result: a baby that was alert and ready to bond with me. A birth that I would be able to get up right away and go potty if I needed (many women with an epidural can't get up for hours because they have problems feeling their legs). A birth where I didn't have to worry about the aftermath and possibility of permanent damage (yes-it's rare, but it's still possible to have lasting damage from an epi). The list went on....

I told myself constantly during my labors that I am a woman. Women are made for giving birth, and birth is not more than I can handle. Mind over matter.

Good luck!!
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  #7  
December 13th, 2009, 12:51 PM
moon~maiden's Avatar Cheryl~ birth truster
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have you done anything to prepare? Mental readiness is VERY important. if you look in the subforum "NCB information and articles of interest" there are links on info on pain in childbirth, fear and emotional prep.

You really do need to make sure you are not being offered meds over and over. Especially in transition, you will think you can't do it. You might not know you are in transition (I didn't) and you wil doubt yourself. That is normal.

Are you and your husband familiar with the stages of labor? Does he know what to look for and what to expect? The Bradley method book has a great chapter for dads with lots of great info.

Also physical readiness is important. LOts of walking can help get you ready. Labor is hard work, so getting some cardio in now can be a big help.
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  #8  
December 13th, 2009, 01:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cheryl33 View Post
have you done anything to prepare? Mental readiness is VERY important. if you look in the subforum "NCB information and articles of interest" there are links on info on pain in childbirth, fear and emotional prep.

You really do need to make sure you are not being offered meds over and over. Especially in transition, you will think you can't do it. You might not know you are in transition (I didn't) and you wil doubt yourself. That is normal.

Are you and your husband familiar with the stages of labor? Does he know what to look for and what to expect? The Bradley method book has a great chapter for dads with lots of great info.

Also physical readiness is important. LOts of walking can help get you ready. Labor is hard work, so getting some cardio in now can be a big help.

That was one thing I was happy about none of the nurses I had made mention of any pain meds... It wasn't until I was threatened with the c-section that one brought up epidural and how it can relax me to dilate more....

Definately mental preparedness is key... I read numerous books on NCB and they were very helpful....
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  #9  
December 13th, 2009, 02:18 PM
ChicaChels's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Transition can be awful. I had no idea I was in it either (I went through it at 6cm after being at 6cm for 9 hours)...but it's really the stage of self doubt. Bradley is great for helping your husband get more comfortable with the idea. Are you going to a midwife or an OB?
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Maverick Jude
December 9, 2013
5:20PM 8lb3oz 20.5"
Hospital water birth
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  #10  
December 13th, 2009, 04:49 PM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
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Location: New York
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I'm with Kellliee.. I had to take the option of pain relief out of the equation... so my last baby was born at home, as will this baby. I remember with my second birth (my first natural one), I was in transition, in the tub, minutes away from pushing telling my DH I couldn't do it, and I wanted an epidural right then. Looking back on it, it was crazy talk, but I MEANT it at the time. So glad he didn't listen to me. We had talked about it all ahead of time and he knew of my strong wishes to go naturally. My Mom and MIL were also there and they knew of my plans and wishes as well. I had great support from them... they knew what I wanted, and even in the hard parts of labor, they were there telling me and reassuring me. I think the right support is incredibly important!
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  #11  
December 13th, 2009, 05:24 PM
Formerly LyndaSLP
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Long Island, NY
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Thank you so much for all of your input! DH and I took a childbirth class that reviewed all the stages of labor (I already knew them but it was a learning experience for DH). We've been practicing the breathing techniques we were taught and I've put together some things I find relaxing to bring with me to the hospital. I've also been trying out different labor positions so when the time comes, I don't forget!

I figure when I get to the hospital I will tell the nurses I do not want to be offered pain meds/epidural. I told DH he needs to be my rock and not let me get the epidural, even if I ask for it during painful contractions. I went over all my reasons for not wanting pain meds with him and told him he will need to remind me of them during labor. We wanted to do this just the two of us, that's why I haven't gotten a doula. I've been working on mentally preparing myself for this experience and feel I have been getting more and more prepared.
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  #12  
December 14th, 2009, 06:19 AM
DoulaMama's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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A lot of parents think a doula will make it less about you, but in my experience I find the exact opposite is true- it makes birth a more powerful and stronger connection between you. Just food for thought.
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Cheryl, mama to Noah Paul born 12/26/09, wife to wonderful hubby Rob
I am proudly a homebirthing, excluively breastfeeding from the tap, constantly babywearing, bed sharing, attached mama to a high needs baby. He is a part time diaper-free baby!

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  #13  
December 14th, 2009, 09:08 PM
ChicaChels's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama View Post
A lot of parents think a doula will make it less about you, but in my experience I find the exact opposite is true- it makes birth a more powerful and stronger connection between you. Just food for thought.
i think this is probably very true...i regret not having a doula everyday.
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Maverick Jude
December 9, 2013
5:20PM 8lb3oz 20.5"
Hospital water birth
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  #14  
December 15th, 2009, 05:30 AM
mgm78's Avatar Zoe's mom Meredith
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Location: PA
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having a doula was a god send to me!
moving is the best defense. i spent over 24 hours walking, moving, etc. i was at birth center so there was no pain med option heat packs and ice packs can help too. i ended up needing a c section, but survived 26 hours of intense labor, medication free by staying mobile. after being up all night the midwife suggested i try to sleep, but once i got into bed, the contractions felt a thousand times worse!

and reread ina may's book!
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  #15  
December 15th, 2009, 11:56 AM
QueenCrafty's Avatar Courtney
Join Date: May 2007
Location: North Carolina
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Support is huge! My DH isn't super thrilled about the idea of a natural birth. I also threatened to not let him in the room if he wasn't going be supportive of my decision. He finally admitted that he didn't want to be the bad guy to talk me out of an epidural if I was asking for it during a moment of weakness. I had to reassure him that I wanted him and will probably need him to be that bad guy because I'll regret another epidural. He gets it now. Good luck!
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