Log In Sign Up

recovering from a birth experience you didn't want


Forum: Natural Childbirth

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Natural Childbirth LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
December 16th, 2009, 09:31 AM
rabbitranch's Avatar est. 2000
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: central FL
Posts: 13,288
What have you found helpful to combat all of those negative feelings about a birth experience that didn't go as you had planned? Did you find anyone you could talk to about it? Was your DH supportive or did he just not get it?

I have to say I am having some pretty low moments about having to have a c-section, and maybe even more about having the placental abruption. I just don't understand why my past 2 pregnancies have been plagued with these rare placental issues, after 2 perfectly normal pregnancies. I feel betrayed by my body. We sort of said we were done having kids but now it feels so final - it hurts so much to think another pregnancy would be dangerous to the baby. And ugh, these hormones aren't helping, and neither is feeling so helpless because of this stupid c-section. And I can't use my new Ergo yet, darnit

Now, on the other hand Hobie is just perfect in every way and I am so in love Here are a couple of pictures for you:









Thanks for letting me blubber.
__________________




Heidi, mama to 4 kiddos and an lost 11.25.13 at 11w4d
Reply With Quote
  #2  
December 16th, 2009, 11:33 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 0
I haven't been there, so I'm sorry, I don't know. I just wanted to say Hobie is beautiful and I send my love!
__________________

Thank you Kiliki for my first beautiful Siggie!

mom of 2 angels and an earth baby
Reply With Quote
  #3  
December 16th, 2009, 12:50 PM
greeneyes's Avatar <-- Just do it.
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: The Tar Heel State
Posts: 6,306
First of all, your son is absolutely gorgeous!

I used to post on this board when I was pregnant last year and I did end up having a natural childbirth, but I have a lot of hostile feelings about some of the things that happened during my labor and delivery. I don't know how to move past it because there are days when I still think about it and am upset and it's been 10 months now. But I do want you to know that what you are feeling is normal and I don't think you should try to force those feelings away. When I've expressed my feelings in the past, people will tell me, "Well, you got a healthy baby out of the deal so you should be happy about that," which I AM but it still doesn't negate the fact that I'm upset about what I didn't get - the birth of my choosing. Birth is an incredibly private, intimate moment between mom, baby, and partner and when things go bad, it feels like something was stolen from us, it can be painful.

I wish you all the best in your recovery and give your beautiful new man many snuggles.
__________________
Kate






Reply With Quote
  #4  
December 16th, 2009, 01:15 PM
mgm78's Avatar Zoe's mom Meredith
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: PA
Posts: 17,089
Send a message via Yahoo to mgm78
awwww great pictures


hmmmm. i dunno. i had a c section, but i guess after my initial grieving i just accepted it. yes it upsets me and i do have a hard time reading birth stories about NCB, but for the most part i just tried to focus my energy on DD. I feel so blessed to have her that in the end, that is all that matters to me. i feel very very robbed by my birth experience, but it is what it is. i am a bit farther out from my birth than you, and time does help. the hormones for sure do not help at all!! I really thought i was going to die during the c section that i guess i am just happy to have lived thru it. It was by far the scariest thing I have ever gone thru. it was so unexpected (as was yours) and the last thing i expected after 1+ days laboring at the birth center was a c section.
__________________





Reply With Quote
  #5  
December 16th, 2009, 05:21 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 7,429
A couple things have been helping me...

Talking about it on here...

Crying about it.... honestly crying has been a HUGE release for me...

And trying to focus on have Noelle here and healthy...

DH just doesn't understand how I feel and its pointless to me to try and talk to him about it...

I have a strong mommy guilt about getting the epidural and having the meds go to my Noelle... I still can't get over it but have been healing slowly... If you need anything please PM me!!1 We can heal together!
__________________
*9 weeks * 4/11/13
*5 weeks * 6/22/13
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:21 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0