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Hi everyone! I’m new to the forum and have many questions/concerns that I am hoping you lovely ladies can help me with.
I will try to keep it brief because I know lives are busy. Okay, here goes:
-How do you go about finding a good midwife?
-Do you do interviews with different midwives before deciding on “the one”?
-What happens if an unforeseen problem arises and you have to go to the hospital? I’ve heard so many women say they basically had medicine forced on them, but more than anything, I’ve heard women say the staff used scare tactics to get them to comply. In those situations how do you know when to listen and when to just say no?
-What are the best tips/tools to best prepare mentally and physically for a natural birth? Any particular exercises, classes, programs, books, videos?
-I know there is a risk of infection after the water breaks (with prolonged labor). How do you keep that risk down when doing a home birth?
-Do you have any personal advice for someone attempting NCB for the first time?
Any advice or suggestions will be greatly appreciated!
Yes, interview! I personally think when you find the one you feel is right, you'll know. I also think the best way to prepare is tell yourself you are having a natural childbirth, you will not get drugs, you want the best for yourself and your baby, etc, etc. Reaffirm what you want for this birth. Don't worry about the risk of infection after the water breaks - it rarely breaks before you're well into labor anyhow. And if it does, the only reason there's a risk of infection is because there's usually tons of hands going in and out of there. If your water does break before going into labor, you've usually got up to 72 hours to start labor and it usually starts within 24-48 of the water breaking. But again, like I said, it rarely breaks before that and as long as you keep hands outta there and keep the area clean, you'll be fine. My best advice is research, research and research some more. Childbirth is not difficult to find out about so do it so you know what you're talking about if you are faced with a medwife or doctor. Good luck!!!!!
-How do you go about finding a good midwife? I asked my Bradley childbirth instructor for recs on midwives she had worked with and had people work with
-Do you do interviews with different midwives before deciding on “the one”? I only interviewed my first choice and I stuck with them because we really connected. If I hadn't of connected with them then I would have interviewed more
-What happens if an unforeseen problem arises and you have to go to the hospital? I’ve heard so many women say they basically had medicine forced on them, but more than anything, I’ve heard women say the staff used scare tactics to get them to comply. In those situations how do you know when to listen and when to just say no? I had an NCB in a hospital and it was fine. I'm doing a home birth this time though. But for my hospital birth I just made it very clear what I wanted. I was lucky and had no one trying to scare me into something. I think you need to educate yourself as much as possible so you know about different scare tactics, etc and feel comfortable saying no
-What are the best tips/tools to best prepare mentally and physically for a natural birth? Any particular exercises, classes, programs, books, videos? I did Bradley classes and loved them. I walk a lot while pregnant and stretch, do squats, etc. There are tons of great books on NCB out there like Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, Natural Childbirth: The Bradley Method, and Hypnobabies, etc
-I know there is a risk of infection after the water breaks (with prolonged labor). How do you keep that risk down when doing a home birth? I would just avoid doing many internal checks, which most midwives avoid anyway. My water broke with Lily prior to me having any contractions and I stayed home until contractions started and were close together before going to the hospital. This time with a home birth my midwives would just like to see labor starting within 24 hours of water breaking
-Do you have any personal advice for someone attempting NCB for the first time? Don't let people try to dissuade you from an NCB just because it is your first time. I had an NCB with my first and it was great. Research/read all that you can. I think the more people that learn about NCB, the more motivated they are to have one
All of the advice above is great!! Same things i would have said.
I just wanted to add that once you do pick a mid-wife or caregiver you are comfortable with they will go over all of these scenarios with you and make you feel comfortable. But also equally important is to read read and read! The more information you have about pregnancy/labor/birth the better equipped you are to make decision and know when there is a real problem versus hospital staff bullying you. But as long as you made the right decision in the first place when you chose your caregiver you shouldn't be put into that kind of situation.
As far as finding the goods on midwives in your area, my best advice is to go to the Mothering.com boards, join your local tribe (not sure where you live, but my local tribe is MA/CT/RI) and ask them. Those ladies will have some great info for you I am sure. You might even make some local friends that way!
as far as tips for prepping- lots of reading, educating yourself, staying active and in shape. That last one is a big one for me. Labor takes a lot of stamina!
I personally took a Holistic Childcare class that was taught by my doula for my first. It was not any method specific but it was VERY helpful. This time I am doing the Hypnobabies home study. The Bradley Method is also very popular here. What you have available to you locally will depend on where you live. I think a good NCB specific class is pretty good for a first time mom if you can find one.
if you plan for a homebirth (provided you stay low risk) the only way you would end up at a hospital is for a big reason, so at that point pain meds might be either the least of your worries or the reason you go in the first place. ya know?
Thanks for the welcome Cheryl! I hate it when replies get eaten, lol. Congrats on your 2nd little girl! My husband and I both want a girl Any thoughts on that Shettles method, haha!
Anyway, thanks for all the great advice. I didn't notice the sub-sections until after I posted. I did go through them, and had most of my questions answered, plus more! That is some wonderful information. I feel so blessed to have found this website, truely. I feel 100% confident in the NCB now.
I will definitely check out the Midwifery link you posted. I don't know if it helps, but I live in North Georgia.
Thanks again for all the info, I've spent hours on this website just today! I can't get over all the info.