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A little hospital vent


Forum: Natural Childbirth

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  #1  
September 2nd, 2010, 06:00 AM
Tiff802's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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So, now that I'm off of my 1st birth experience high (that wasn't myself, of course), I am thinking back on some of the things that the hospital staff said and did that makes me think how much of a struggle it could be for someone to have a NCB if they didn't have support! When my friend was in the examination room I was sitting outside of the room by the nurse station. One of the nurses was prepping two other nurses on my friend's situation and they were all very excited that she wanted a NCB and that she was so focused and calm and seemed very prepared (she did Hypnobabies and was listening to her scripts). 2 of the nurses went in to check on my friend and I told the remaining nurse, "I am so happy to hear that you guys are so supportive of NCB!" She said, "Oh yes, especially when they're this calm, now if they came in screaming at 5 cm. we wouldn't be as supportive because it wouldn't do anybody any good." I thought to myself, what the heck, you need a new profession if you can't handle the screaming! If someone comes in at 5 cm screaming and they still want to go natural, who gives you the right to deter her!!!! Then, of course when my friend started getting loud, screaming, she was going from 8-10 cm and her baby was posterior, the nurse runs in several times asking if she wants medication. Made me angry! She knew that my friend wanted a NCB! It's so annoying that they want to push the meds so that everyone can be calm and quiet and they don't have to deal with the crazy pregnant ladies. Anyhow, thanks for letting me vent.

BTW, for those that didn't read my other post, she did end up with a NCB.
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  #2  
September 2nd, 2010, 06:08 AM
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Unfortunately, that's everywhere. I loved my doula and most of my nurses but EVERY ONE of them suggested an epidural at some point. Because they were concerned about my energy levels or it might speed up labor if I relaxed or, or, or... My DH was the only one who never said I should get the meds. In the end it didn't matter who was there or what they said. All that mattered was that my mind was made up and pain meds were not an option as far as I was concerned.
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  #3  
September 2nd, 2010, 06:34 AM
moon~maiden's Avatar Cheryl~ birth truster
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my nurse for Cadie's birth was pretty slow and frustrating but she never once said anything about drugs, I felt "lucky" for sure. I was obviously in a ton of pain with my back spasms. Most of the time we were there was pushing though, so I guess it was pointless for her to say anything at that point.
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  #4  
September 2nd, 2010, 06:35 AM
monica8's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I can honestly say they never asked me if I wanted an epidural.

When I got it, I was the one that brought it up. The nurses were really great the whole time. Maybe it was because I was really calm, maybe it was the nurses I had, too. I made sure to get some that were NCB friendly since I didn't want to be asked about an epidural every contraction.

That's too bad those nurses didn't feel the same way. That was such a dumb comment of her to make, too.
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  #5  
September 2nd, 2010, 07:11 AM
Isaeph's Avatar Jennifer the Momma
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Oh my goodness Tiff! It's so fascinating to read the actual comments. It's kind of like working in a daycare, if you can't handle crying babies/toddlers, you need a new profession. Women cry/scream/rave during labor. It freaking hurts. Get over it.
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  #6  
September 2nd, 2010, 07:32 AM
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I told my OBGYN and nurse with Hunter that I wanted a NCB because I didn't do well with medications and I didn't want interventions because I heard that they lead to medications. They were so supportive, until I came to the hospital after 15 hours of peaceful laboring at home. Broke my waters and started pitocin for no reason. Didn't even ask me, didn't even tell me what was going on. Just did those things. After awhile I was feeling really sick from not being able to eat or drink and the nurse kept asking me to take medications so I felt better. So I did, and it made it so much worse. It sucked, I wish they would have just listened to me when I said "I DO NOT DO WELL WITH MEDICATION". Homebirth was so much better. They probably wouldn't have liked me because I talked loudly to my baby as I was pushing. No screaming, but loudly because talking loud felt like it was helping baby down.
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  #7  
September 2nd, 2010, 07:43 AM
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Deplorable. That's why I homebirth now. I'm so glad she did have her NCB
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  #8  
September 2nd, 2010, 08:36 AM
horseradishmayo's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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uh, yea those women definitely need a new profession! thankfully your friend knew her stuff and stuck to her plan....good for her.
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  #9  
September 2nd, 2010, 12:27 PM
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Thankfully my nurses never offered me anything. I'm pretty sure I would have been able to decline if they had but I'm just glad they didn't. At one point I actually asked if it was too late and she just told me it wasn't too late but didn't say anything else. Then I immediately talked myself out of it. They kept telling me I did pretty well but I know I wasn't very quiet. I was calm but somewhat loud I think, but thankfully they were all very encouraging.

I was speaking with a lady at church who used to be a L&D nurse (and a doula) and she said whenever a woman would say she wanted to try to have a NCB they just had the attitude of "Let's see how long she will last" like it's impossible or something. I mean I'm sure they do see lots of women who probably try to go without pain meds but don't have much of a plan for it and end up getting an epi, but c'mon. Have a little faith in a person - maybe if they were more supportive and didn't say and do so many things that would make it difficult to achieve a drug-free birth then more women would be successful.
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  #10  
September 2nd, 2010, 12:34 PM
Kathode's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vincent'sMommy View Post
maybe if they were more supportive and didn't say and do so many things that would make it difficult to achieve a drug-free birth then more women would be successful.
I absolutely agree! If they HELPED instead of pushing the meds at every turn, they might see successful NCBs more often! I had a fantastic nurse this time around. When I asked for meds, she talked me out of it, reminding me that I didn't really want them. Awesome. She even told the stupid doctor off once or twice, as in 'she didn't ask for that' or 'she doesn't want you to do that'. She was really more like a doula in that respect. I was so grateful to have her because it is very difficult to achieve a NCB in a hospital. We need more nurses like her.
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  #11  
September 2nd, 2010, 12:41 PM
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The nurse I had with my daughter was great. She kept telling me what great job I was doing. And when I apologized for being loud during pushing and possibly scaring the other moms, she told me that there was nothing to apologize for.

At a different hospital that my friend uses, she had nurses tell her that it was okay to scream and if she wanted to swear to go right ahead.
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  #12  
September 2nd, 2010, 03:53 PM
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I think part of it is nursing training. (i do not work in labor and delivery though) I know they train us to do everything you can to make your patient comfortable. They even make us document their pain scale every few hours, and if they have pain, they want you to document what you did about it and if it worked. If it didn't work they expect MORE documentation. And if the patient doesn't want anything for pain, you better document the hell out of it. Becuase you WILL get written up or fired for "not providing adequate care". Thank you Joint Commission.

Labor and delivery is a special environment though. Almost all patients are expected to have pain. But we are still legally bound to ask the patient about pain, and whether or not they want assistance. Which can be awkward when a birth plan reads (do not offer pain relief).
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  #13  
September 2nd, 2010, 04:10 PM
GranolaMamaOf3's Avatar ~Heather~
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sara~b View Post
Unfortunately, that's everywhere. I loved my doula and most of my nurses but EVERY ONE of them suggested an epidural at some point. Because they were concerned about my energy levels or it might speed up labor if I relaxed or, or, or... My DH was the only one who never said I should get the meds. In the end it didn't matter who was there or what they said. All that mattered was that my mind was made up and pain meds were not an option as far as I was concerned.
Your DOULA recommended that you get meds?! I can't imagine!
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  #14  
September 3rd, 2010, 09:39 AM
BobbityBoo's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alicenwonderland View Post
I think part of it is nursing training. (i do not work in labor and delivery though) I know they train us to do everything you can to make your patient comfortable. They even make us document their pain scale every few hours, and if they have pain, they want you to document what you did about it and if it worked. If it didn't work they expect MORE documentation. And if the patient doesn't want anything for pain, you better document the hell out of it. Becuase you WILL get written up or fired for "not providing adequate care". Thank you Joint Commission.

Labor and delivery is a special environment though. Almost all patients are expected to have pain. But we are still legally bound to ask the patient about pain, and whether or not they want assistance. Which can be awkward when a birth plan reads (do not offer pain relief).
That's actually a really interesting view on things. All of it just seems like such a conflict of interest. Doctors and nurses are taught how to fix things but obviously labor and birth is something that doesn't need to be fixed. Even if they want to be supportive it's hard for them to be because the nature of their job and how they were trained.
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  #15  
September 3rd, 2010, 10:59 AM
moon~maiden's Avatar Cheryl~ birth truster
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yeah, nice viewpoint Alice, thanks for sharing that!
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  #16  
September 3rd, 2010, 11:17 AM
Jule'sMomInOR's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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My nurse and doctor actually read through my birth plan line by line. The nurse didn't directly offer me pain meds, but she said "Your birth plan says not to offer you pain meds so I won't. However, if you want them you better speak up now." Uh ... isn't this almost the same as offering me pain meds?? Ugh.
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  #17  
September 3rd, 2010, 08:43 PM
Earthy.Mama's Avatar .*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.
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What's funny is that when in the hospital w/ Kailey medicine never even occurred to me. It was like it didn't exist. Once my cervix started closing and the pain set in my MW suggested pitocin and epi to calm me down enough to re-open my cervix. It was then that I was like, "Oh yea, they do have meds for this stuff"
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  #18  
September 4th, 2010, 09:23 AM
alicenwonderland's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by moon~maiden View Post
yeah, nice viewpoint Alice, thanks for sharing that!

A good example is the average headache. Normally if you have a headache, and tylenol doesn't work, you go to bed and try to sleep it off. The the hospital.... we offer tylenol... then percocet.... then morphine.... etc.
It's overkill! But the crazy thing is the patients seem to go right along with it and want somehting.
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  #19  
September 5th, 2010, 08:06 PM
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Glad she got her NCB!

I had an awesome nurse during the day with AJ (I had walked in there saying that I didn't want an epi). I had done 3 days of contractions (2 hours of it was even with pitocin - and an awful dose of staydol) and was starting my 4th. I was only there a few hours before the broke my water and started pitocin again. Luckily, DH won't let them near me with pitocin this time. The problem will come with the meds - he doesn't like to see me in pain and then he will be worthless.
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