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Any tips Natural birth mommas??!!


Forum: Natural Childbirth

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  #1  
April 9th, 2012, 09:26 AM
AltMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Not to exclude anyone who has had a medicated or c-section birth.. There's no shame in that and sometimes it's necessary. My beliefs are just very strong that my body knows what it's doing and it's best for me and for baby if I do it 100 percent natural. In my mind.. Medicine is absolutely not even an option unless there is something EXTREMELY wrong.

So my question to you natural birth mommas; Have you gotten a lot of ****, or been mocked for your choice? I have been and it's really been making me SO angry. Since when have women lost complete faith in their bodies and decided that it's stupid or immature for wanting to do it on my own? Women have literally LAUGHED in my face. And told me how ridiculous I am for wanting to do it that way. And that I have no idea what i'm talking about and there's no way I will be able to handle it. I feel so utterly disrespected. Since when do they know my mental and physical capabilities??! As if because i'm young my threshold or capacity for pain or knowledge is somehow far less than theirs. I've been studying midwifery and everything to do with birth for years. I've always been interested and I do know what I'm talking about. It just really upsets me when people put me down for my beliefs.It's almost like someone making fun of my religion. That's just how important this is to me. My body and my baby mean everything and I WILL do this on my own.

I just don't know how to deal with the negative and mean comments I receive on the DAILY.



(Copy and pasted from my DDC.. Figured I could get some good opinions from this board as well)
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  #2  
April 9th, 2012, 10:07 AM
LaceyMay2630's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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You can do it Mama! You and I are in the same boat here! Sometimes I just want to smack people for their comments. Like I'll be with my SIL at the grocery store, she's going to be my doula, and we're talking about natural birth and complete strangers will stop us and tell us that what we're doing is selfish and wrong. GRRR.
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  #3  
April 9th, 2012, 10:12 AM
AltMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Isn't it crazy how easy it is for people to pass judgement when they know SO much less or close to nothing!

As if we were doing this to be selfish.. As if we didn't look into it or research. Ugh. I could go on for hours about how badly it pisses me off when people act like know-it-all's yet refuse to learn anything true on the subject!!
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  #4  
April 9th, 2012, 10:17 AM
LaceyMay2630's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Seriously. Most of the people that I've talked to know nothing about natural births, and a lot of them are younger girls that I work with that have seen births only in movies where the mom is screaming in pain. It doesn't have to be like that! If they would, like you said, do some research they'd understand more. Ugh.
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  #5  
April 9th, 2012, 11:30 AM
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I hear ya! I have gotten the same thing from the women around me. I think it's just a shame that we can't support eachother as women. I tend to get a very "oh, honey, you'll end up getting the drugs" as they do the perverbial head tap as if I'm a child. And I think to myself, I'm a 35 year old woman, I know what I'm doing and I've done my homework on this. It's just sad.

However, we all need to remember this when other women talk about wanting a medicated birth or scheduling a c-section...it's not our place to judge, just support them in their decision. That's one thing I have learned from this experience and I'm happy about that.
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  #6  
April 9th, 2012, 01:30 PM
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You can totally do this! I honestly stopped talking to people about my birth plans when I was pregnant with Kennedy. Now i only share them with certain people - kike all of my friends from the birth center's mom's group, etc. It's easier than dealing with people's negativity and comments. In fact, my SIL keeps telling me they want to come help while we're in the hospital. I haven't mentioned that we'll be having a home birth yet!
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  #7  
April 9th, 2012, 02:09 PM
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Welcome to the board.
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  #8  
April 9th, 2012, 02:38 PM
HappyHippy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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You can do it! Those other women are probably jealous and if you get it from a man or a woman who has never had a kid, then they have no idea what a woman's body can do.

I was never mocked IRL, but online, yes.
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  #9  
April 11th, 2012, 06:13 PM
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I learned very early in my pregnancy to not mention my birth plans to anyone unless I wanted to hear about how dangerous it was or how I would be begging for drugs. I'm like you and didn't want that negativity. Because I was a first time mom people would just roll their eyes when they heard that I was having a home birth and make comments about how I was naive because I had never experienced childbirth before and once I knew what I was in for I would change my mind. When people asked me who my doctor was I would just casually say "oh, I'm seeing a midwife" and that would be the end of it. I'm much more vocal about how I gave birth now that I've had a successful NCB.
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  #10  
April 11th, 2012, 07:00 PM
therevslady's Avatar Built for Birth
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I stayed pretty quiet about my plans last time around as well. When I got the birth I wanted, I wanted to shout it from the roof tops to all the haters. But I didn't. I pretty much only talk about it when asked directly. People always freak out, and I just tell them that it really wasn't all that bad; I liked it actually and I'm looking forward to doing it again.
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  #11  
April 11th, 2012, 10:09 PM
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You can do it!

I got a lot of flack from people when I was pregnant with my first. Then, I had her naturally and everyone shut up for a bit. But then I had my second at home and I got a ton of stuff about that from people. I'm due soon with my 3rd and am planning a NCB at the hospital (just like with my first) and I'm still getting comments about why would I want to have another NCB, etc. It's just really annoying. I don't sit around and ask people why they aren't having a NCB, so why do they get to question me and make fun of my choice?
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  #12  
April 12th, 2012, 01:50 AM
daneeleigh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissusF View Post
I learned very early in my pregnancy to not mention my birth plans to anyone unless I wanted to hear about how dangerous it was or how I would be begging for drugs. I'm like you and didn't want that negativity. Because I was a first time mom people would just roll their eyes when they heard that I was having a home birth and make comments about how I was naive because I had never experienced childbirth before and once I knew what I was in for I would change my mind. When people asked me who my doctor was I would just casually say "oh, I'm seeing a midwife" and that would be the end of it. I'm much more vocal about how I gave birth now that I've had a successful NCB.
Ditto
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